ashlee12130 Posted July 17, 2011 Posted July 17, 2011 I met this guy online a couple months ago. We started as just friends but it quickly elevated to a lot more. We had plans to meet up sometime. But everything started to change. We had a conversation one night and decided that we weren't going to see other people. We used to talk almost daily. Well the two weeks following that conversation, we barely spoke. I would try texting him but would rarely get responses. He had just started a new job and was in the process of moving. I tried not to let the no contact thing bother me. But it did. I mean, it isn't difficult to send me a text and tell me hi and that you have been busy. And I said something about wanting to talk more than 1-2 times a week. Well over the next two weeks, nothing changed. We still barely spoke. Then one night we were texting. And he said something about me seeing other guys. I told him I hadn't been and he didn't believe me. Then he just ignored me the rest of the night. I asked him the next day what was wrong and told him that it upset me that he thought that low of me. He said he was in a bad mood the night before and I just left it alone. The next day he text me asking if I was giving up on him, I told him I didn't want to but felt like he wanted me to. He said he didn't but he knew I had guys that hit on me down here and thought one might get my attention since he lives so far away. I tried reassuring him, that no one had my attention but him. So over the next week, we talked like twice. And I told him that I wanted us to talk more than we were or I was going to try to move on. He acted like it upset him that I said that. But we haven't talked since. This conversation was on July 5th. I text him this past Wednesday and told him I was sorry for ever doing anything to hurt him and I missed him a lot. He never responded. I haven't tried to contact him again, but I really want to. I just don't know if I should. I miss him so much.
U1987 Posted July 17, 2011 Posted July 17, 2011 I met this guy online a couple months ago. We started as just friends but it quickly elevated to a lot more. We had plans to meet up sometime. How does it "elevate to something more" when you haven't even met? I really don't understand how you or anyone could get seriously attached with someone you only talk online with.
Author ashlee12130 Posted July 17, 2011 Author Posted July 17, 2011 It just did. I can't really explain it. We both felt there was something there.
Nexus One Posted July 17, 2011 Posted July 17, 2011 He seems to give off a controlling vibe. Whether he had a bad day or not, he had no reason to assume that other guys were hitting on you and EVEN IF that was the case, then it's not up to him to determine who you can talk to, because it would be up to you to set those boundaries and not him. The fact that he so early in the "relationship" seems already so controlling is a red flag in my opinion.
Arabella Posted July 17, 2011 Posted July 17, 2011 If he ever cared about you, he wouldn't have just stopped talking to you. The reason why he was grilling you about seeing other guys is, more than likely, a guilty conscience. Someone came along and he's been seeing her, so he felt guilty when you two spoke and tried to get you to confess that you had done the same. When he didn't get the answer he was hoping for, he retreated. This is also likely the reason why he has had no time to talk to you. Best you can do is move on.
Author ashlee12130 Posted July 17, 2011 Author Posted July 17, 2011 Thanks. I think I have known I needed to move on. Just needed someone to say it to me. I just miss him a lot and can't stop.
Valid Sintax Posted July 18, 2011 Posted July 18, 2011 If he ever cared about you, he wouldn't have just stopped talking to you. The reason why he was grilling you about seeing other guys is, more than likely, a guilty conscience. Someone came along and he's been seeing her, so he felt guilty when you two spoke and tried to get you to confess that you had done the same. When he didn't get the answer he was hoping for, he retreated. This is also likely the reason why he has had no time to talk to you. Best you can do is move on. I agree entirely with Arabella. One of the most common reactions people have from doing something wrong is by putting it on someone else. Chances are, IMHO, that he was seeing someone else or other people all along, and then when you wanted it to be exclusive, he didn't want that (or realized later that he didn't want that). Then, he feels guilty about what he did and tries to put it on you. The relationship, unfortunately for you, was likely never going anywhere and it almost certainly won't in the future either. It's best to move on.
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