GG3 Posted July 17, 2011 Posted July 17, 2011 I've always tended to search for the chemistry when going out on dates and meeting people. I have only dated people beyond a few dates that I have chemistry with. How many of you here do the same? How long do you date someone if you don't feel a certain click or chemistry? Or how many of you don't necessarily look for the chemistry?
grkBoy Posted July 17, 2011 Posted July 17, 2011 Chemistry is overrated. People put too much stock in that "funny feeling in their heart or tummy". Playas are skilled at creating chemistry with any woman they want, which shows how much you can't rely on it as a means of seeing if someone is ideal. When I first met my GF, I didn't feel any sparks or fires. I thought she was nice and "ok". It wasn't until I really got to know her over a period of time that the chemistry grew. Even with past GFs, they all didn't just "instantly" fall for me. It took time when they got to know me better. I watch too many men and women put way too much stock on chemistry and go on and on about how they must have it...but they're the ones constantly breaking up with people and chronically single. You do see SOME success stories where the chemistry led to "happily ever after", but I believe more people BUILT the chemistry over time rather than hope for it to instantly happen.
rafallus Posted July 17, 2011 Posted July 17, 2011 Never worked for me without it. Time frames were very varied, sometimes in years, but it was never dating prior to that. I barely even acknowledged them, and vice versa. Before prom I had one "date" without "chemistry". It was merely 2 hours of fluff talk, then when I walked her to the bus stop, I wondered "maybe I should kiss her? Maybe hug her? Nah" and just said goodbye.
Casablanca Posted July 18, 2011 Posted July 18, 2011 I'll do a couple dates and see if anything develops...some people are really shy at first My last girlfriend...I met her online, talked to her on the phone a couple times, wasnt super crazy about her, she said she had some allergy problems which was effecting the way she talks...we met for drinks, went better than expected...still wasnt super sure, but thought she had enough potential for another date, went out had a really good time getting better each moment as she opened up...she was just really shy Got to have some chemistry, but I allow a couple dates if I feel there is potential
somedude81 Posted July 18, 2011 Posted July 18, 2011 Bah, chemistry is a load of BS. It's just one more excuse why a girl won't go out with somebody. For me "chemistry" is simple. Am I attracted to her? Yes or no. If the above is true, does she seem fun and can we get along? If both are true, then tada chemistry.
murrpanda Posted July 18, 2011 Posted July 18, 2011 When I go on a date with someone, if I didn't feel a sort of connection with them, then there is probably no second date. Why would I waste my time going out with someone when I don't feel anything? If there is no chemistry right away, they automatically fall into friend zone, whether I want that or not...
Casablanca Posted July 18, 2011 Posted July 18, 2011 Bah, chemistry is a load of BS. It's just one more excuse why a girl won't go out with somebody. For me "chemistry" is simple. Am I attracted to her? Yes or no. If the above is true, does she seem fun and can we get along? If both are true, then tada chemistry. Well you just showed that chemistry isnt a load of BS for you...if you cant get along with them and cant have fun, then you don't have chemistry
cheergirl Posted July 18, 2011 Posted July 18, 2011 Never worked for me without it. Time frames were very varied, sometimes in years, but it was never dating prior to that. I barely even acknowledged them, and vice versa. Before prom I had one "date" without "chemistry". It was merely 2 hours of fluff talk, then when I walked her to the bus stop, I wondered "maybe I should kiss her? Maybe hug her? Nah" and just said goodbye. Yeah, it's even harder if you're a girl...any time spent with a man leads them to believe there's a chance... Just end up disappointing other people, hurting them which isn't cool... Means you might stay home a lot in between LTRs. but what#s life without chemistry? worth the wait. Gotta have it, me.... Well you just showed that chemistry isnt a load of BS for you...if you cant get along with them and cant have fun, then you don't have chemistry lol...
somedude81 Posted July 18, 2011 Posted July 18, 2011 Well you just showed that chemistry isnt a load of BS for you...if you cant get along with them and cant have fun, then you don't have chemistry The problem is that there are girls who I know have had a lot of fun and got along great with me but they didn't like me in that way. I have chemistry but they don't. That's the BS I'm talking about.
oaks Posted July 18, 2011 Posted July 18, 2011 How many of you here do the same? How long do you date someone if you don't feel a certain click or chemistry? Or how many of you don't necessarily look for the chemistry? It depends what you mean by Chemistry. If I enjoyed the first date I'll probably ask for a second date, but by the second or third date I want to know that I'm attracted to her and have a reasonable idea that she's at least enjoying my company to want to continue.
alexlakeman Posted July 18, 2011 Posted July 18, 2011 For a relationship potential, yeah there needs to be chemistry. If you just want to get laid, I just make up the chemistry...
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