GivenUp0083 Posted July 17, 2011 Posted July 17, 2011 My friend who was dating back and forth with my ex's best friend ended it with her this week. He was telling me about all the things he told her and it slipped that my ex had brought the guy she was "dating" to the airport to pick up her friend. He didn't mean to tell me, but the cat is out of the bag now. I've been really happy the last few weeks, I've met a lot of girls, none who were interested in me initially from what I know, but I've been overall having a good time. I'm still losing weight and I feel and look really good physically. I guess I just haven't found even a date and yet it's so easy for my ex to just find a brand new guy all of a sudden. I did see this coming, when she broke up with me I told all my friends she'll have a new bf in 2 months....sure enough I was right. All her BS emails about staying in touch and trying to be friends I guess was bogus. What was she thinking? She would lead me on by being friends and then poof! see ya later when she found a new guy? I don't know how I feel about this. I don't want to see or hear about it, and it's not a surprise. I guess part of me felt like there would be a chance she would come back or at least try to talk to me in person like a grown up instead of her lame email and gchat attempts, but I guess I was wrong. She clearly has moved on and I obviously didn't mean anything to her.
HeartOfAPhoenix Posted July 17, 2011 Posted July 17, 2011 Typically it's easier for a girl to find a new guy than it is for a guy to find a new girl. I think her keeping in touch with you was helping her heal. you see that in a lot because it relieves the guilt that the dumper experiences after they terminate the relationship. Luckily you kind of expected this so you were prepared at some level, I know the feeling when you find out your ex is already dating again and there's no way you can be prepared enough for it not to affect you in even the slightest way.
SWAN808 Posted July 17, 2011 Posted July 17, 2011 sorry to hear this dude. It always sucks...you are right that people can often do the 'friends' thing to soften the blow but then when a potential partner pops up 'see ya later!'...it hurts...it takes a seriously good person to stick with it when that happens... the best you can do is get support from your mates and to keep your head down - work on yourself to feel good about yourself - and keep out there so you can bounce back...maintain your dignity and self-worth. you are a man of value and character Im sure-so remember that.
Author GivenUp0083 Posted July 17, 2011 Author Posted July 17, 2011 Well I banged a girl earlier that day, she's just a FWB kind of girl, only hang out with her for that reason, but I don't have any emotional attachment to her. Somewhat of a soulless act for me, but whatever, you'd think that would keep my mind occupied from it but it doesn't. For some stupid reason this weekend I re-activated my OKCupid account and sent out some emails, but same old story: haven't gotten any responses. I even put my profile up for some people to review or critique and no one had anything bad to say about my profile, all good reviews. Anyway, even though I saw it coming, still sucks to hear about. I'm not depressed or anything, just wish other guys wouldn't make the same mistake I did and see right through her bull****.
stray Posted July 17, 2011 Posted July 17, 2011 I always kind of hate being very blunt, but seriously - you're not going to find anyone decent or ever get back with your ex if you're banging random chicks and spending time on Okcupid. I can't even imagine having the time for such a lifestyle. Don't you aspire to become anything else in life besides a douche? You should! Life is very short! Get off the internet, get some real hobbies, go back to school, work on your mind and body, and everything else will follow suit. But you're currently not dealing with this in any way that will help you in the long run, and that's the honest truth.
Author GivenUp0083 Posted July 17, 2011 Author Posted July 17, 2011 I always kind of hate being very blunt, but seriously - you're not going to find anyone decent or ever get back with your ex if you're banging random chicks and spending time on Okcupid. I can't even imagine having the time for such a lifestyle. Don't you aspire to become anything else in life besides a douche? You should! Life is very short! Get off the internet, get some real hobbies, go back to school, work on your mind and body, and everything else will follow suit. But you're currently not dealing with this in any way that will help you in the long run, and that's the honest truth. Well I work 9-5 in a good paying job, I play baseball in a mens league, I play co-ed flag football 6 months out of the year, I work out almost 2 hours each day after work, I have plenty of friends, I visit their parties/outings, have dinner with friends, I meet new people all the time, but it's usually through alcohol. How is satisfying sexual/physical needs after 2 months of nothing with someone I've known a long time making me a douche? how does trying to find someone with similar interests online make me not have real hobbies? I appreciate the honesty, but I think you should think twice before making such accusations. I've asked a couple girls for their numbers in person, but neither responded when I called. No big deal, I'll keep asking girls out that I find interesting until one goes out with me. Using a free site for a couple minutes one afternoon to send a couple emails doesn't mean I live on the internet.
stray Posted July 17, 2011 Posted July 17, 2011 There's just more to life than girls and sex, and being liked by girls. Seriously, there's a big world out there with all kinds of crazy, cool, mind-blowing events happening and information being passed around and thought-provoking questions being asked. But to each their own. I personally can't imagine being consumed by sex and admiration from men day in and day out, I would be miserable. But everyone lives their life in their own way and different things make different people happy.
Author GivenUp0083 Posted July 18, 2011 Author Posted July 18, 2011 There's just more to life than girls and sex, and being liked by girls. Seriously, there's a big world out there with all kinds of crazy, cool, mind-blowing events happening and information being passed around and thought-provoking questions being asked. But to each their own. I personally can't imagine being consumed by sex and admiration from men day in and day out, I would be miserable. But everyone lives their life in their own way and different things make different people happy. I don't see life as just girls and sex either. If you read my previous threads you'll see that I was in love with this woman. But that you for the advice, I just think I'm the wrong person for what you're trying to say. You're like a person trying to teach a priest what God is.
BrainRightHeartWrong Posted July 18, 2011 Posted July 18, 2011 Typically it's easier for a girl to find a new guy than it is for a guy to find a new girl. I think her keeping in touch with you was helping her heal. you see that in a lot because it relieves the guilt that the dumper experiences after they terminate the relationship. Luckily you kind of expected this so you were prepared at some level, I know the feeling when you find out your ex is already dating again and there's no way you can be prepared enough for it not to affect you in even the slightest way. This is what I inadvertently experienced a loooong time ago... I went out with a girl for 4 months, the bitch dumped me, 'she wanted to be friends' and I thought I could get back with her if I did... I was 'friends' with her for one month... one day I thought 'f*** this crap' and COMPLETELY ignored her, I mean blanked her out for good... She pleaded with me to contact her for ages and I kept blanking her, I got my friend to collect my stuff from her house and he told me she completely went to pieces over it... I initially didn't want revenge but thinking back boy it was sweet!
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