alexandria35 Posted July 18, 2011 Posted July 18, 2011 well you know her better than anyone hopefully. And I'm not trying to tell you she IS for sure having an affair. But anyone that has dealt with infidelity will tell you the 2 biggest red flags that your spouse is cheating is, lack of sex, and your spouse all of a sudden wanting to lose weight. If she isn't interested in sex for you, then lose weight for who? Some will chime in and say for herself. But that is usually if they are very overweight. This is just a few pounds from what I understand. And the purpose is to look good naked. but if it isn't to look good naked for you, then who? Again, not saying this is what is happening, but these are the 2 biggest red flags. If you knew anything about women you would know that gaining weight and losing interest in sex often go hand in hand. If a woman doesn't feel good about her body and isn't confident about her appearance she will avoid having sex. Now if she had LOST weight and then started avoiding sex with her SO I would agree with you, but the OP stated that she hasn't lost any weight so I would suspect that she feels insecure and that is probably having an impact on her interest in sex.
Memphis Raines Posted July 18, 2011 Posted July 18, 2011 If you knew anything about women you would know that gaining weight and losing interest in sex often go hand in hand. yup, and knowing situations where women, and men alike, aren't having sex with their partners, but have the desire all of a sudden to lose weight, its a huge red flag. If a woman doesn't feel good about her body and isn't confident about her appearance she will avoid having sex. Now if she had LOST weight and then started avoiding sex with her SO I would agree with you, but the OP stated that she hasn't lost any weight so I would suspect that she feels insecure and that is probably having an impact on her interest in sex. and if you read what I said, I merely brought it up as a possibility for him to ponder. I wasn't saying his wife most certainly was doing this, and that he should know her better than anyone. Just brought it up as something that tends to throw up a flag.
Spark1111 Posted July 18, 2011 Posted July 18, 2011 I think your wife is depressed. Sleeping on the couch, lack of interest in anything, exhausted, overwhelmed, not completing household tasks, etc. Has she been assessed? Treated? I would read all the books, got to IC and MC, and make a final concerted effort to repair what is damaged before I would go out and damage it further with an affair. What the hell would that fix? Nothing. If you find in one year it is not fixable, then divorce, with your integrity and self-respect in tact. Don't you owe that to the woman you claim to love? Your children? Your marriage? Her obssession with wieght loss is a red herring, a diversion. She believes if she loses weight, she will feel better about herself, and about life. The question remains: Why isn't life good enough now? I think she needs some professional help, not for her libido, but for her psyche.
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