Wings Of Love Posted July 15, 2011 Posted July 15, 2011 Well, I'm back! I have to say, so far 2011 has been a fantastic year, and I finally feel alive again, like I'm not just going through the motions. It feels amazing! But I have a small problem, and was hoping you lovely people could provide some kind of opinion? Alright, here goes. If you've read my old posts, you'll know the story between my ex and myself. In short, we split up in February 2009, he reappeared in my life August 2010 and convinced me he still loved me, we slept together and then he walked away again. In June this year, a friend of his felt I should know that my ex cheated on me back when we were still together. After the initial hurt and anger passed, I can honestly say I felt free of him. I have never been happier than I have been in the time since I found this out. If I think about him or see pictures of him, I feel nothing, complete indifference. So why is it that every time I see or hear his NAME, my heart starts racing and my body trembles and I feel like I've taken several steps back on my journey to recovery? I've taken every precaution, blocked him and most of his friends from contacting me, but it appears some have slipped through the cracks. A mutual friend of ours (and, strangely enough, another ex of mine) is still in touch via Facebook, and he sees my other ex fairly often. This is driving me crazy! I feel ready now to meet someone else, but on the odd occasion that his name pops up somewhere, I feel as though I'm just trying to make myself believe I'm over this. Memories and pictures do nothing to affect me. But the mere sight of his name, just ten little letters, turns me into a mess of emotion. Any insight at all?
livy07 Posted July 15, 2011 Posted July 15, 2011 It's completely normal to feel that way. I went through a similar situation (broke up in Oct 2009) and I STILL react that way, to a lesser degree. I no longer love him and I certainly do not want him back, but I can't get past feeling that sick wave in my stomach when I hear his name mentioned. When someone hurts and betrays you that deeply, it takes a while to heal. Just hang in there and know that it gets better.
Author Wings Of Love Posted July 17, 2011 Author Posted July 17, 2011 Thanks for the replies. I guess we all have setbacks at some point, it's just a case of working through them. It has taken me a long time to reach this point, I was worried that I hadn't truly moved past the end of our relationship and I was just internalising the pain. It is so good to know I'm not alone in feeling this way, and to know that, given time, things will get better.
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