KR10N Posted July 14, 2011 Posted July 14, 2011 Carhill, if you keep talking using this terminology, you'll just scare off the women LOL (I'm just kidding C.H. http://www.shirtsnob.com/archives/pictures/nerdyi-heart-nerds.gif
carhill Posted July 14, 2011 Posted July 14, 2011 Carhill, if you keep talking using this terminology, you'll just scare off the women LOLI don't need data points to do that! Sam, right on and I agree, though I was late to develop that mindset, beginning in my early 30's. Prior, it wasn't so much discerning leagues as it was improper emotional responses to repeated rejections. Once I solved that issue, it got better.
KathyM Posted July 14, 2011 Posted July 14, 2011 The mistake you are making is in bundling old, unattractive and overweight together as if they all come together. I know many men in their 40s and even 50s, whom you would never know they were older than 35. They go to bars, but they aren't fixtures at bars and hitting on young girls because they are busy with women who are chasing them and others waiting in line. I know a guy who is 62 and looks younger than I do at a healthy 37. He dates 23 y.o. s and they fight over him. In fact more guys I know look young than look their age, and this is without makeup or hair dye of any kind, can't say the same about women. Incidentally, how old do you think Johnny Depp is? I know Demi Moore is 49, and if you respond by wanting to compare male and female young looking celebs, my list will be as long as an arm and leg and yours will be about 6" long. No need to even go there. Men who take care of themselves age much better than comparable women, sorry it's true. I wouldn't agree with that. It's all in the genetics. There are plenty of women that look younger than they really are, because of good care and good genetics. If you look at any of the dating websites, you'll see probably just as many older-looking men than women in the above 40 age range. I don't think men age better than women.
KathyM Posted July 14, 2011 Posted July 14, 2011 Men age better than women, all other things being equal, including genetics and good care. Most of the reason is hormonal. This shows in general skin condition, wrinkling, and skin elasticity. Human animals are programmed to wither once reproductive age is passed, sounds harsh, just a fact of life. In exchange for aging worse in general appearance, women have little or none of the pattern baldness problems that can start affecting men at an early age. Women also live longer although this could even out in our lifetimes. Men don't wear makeup or use hair dye generally. If you put a bunch of 45 y.o. men and women in a room, the women stripped of all makeup of any kind and especially hair dye, what I'm talking about would be immediately obvious. Well, if you want to take away hair dye and makeup, you might put women at a disadvantage. I mean, even Katy Perry looks pretty bad without her makeup and those wigs. But I wouldn't say the skin is worse on middle-aged women than men. I think women take better care of their skin. They moisturize it, exfoliate, etc. Men do nothing to their skin, and probably use harsh deodorant soap on it. I haven't noticed women looking older than men. I do notice an awful lot of middle aged men going bald and overweight. That is the biggest aging factor that make men look old.
AD1980 Posted July 14, 2011 Posted July 14, 2011 The downside is that the man would get rejected over and over. Where is the fun in that? Men should realize that if all a beautiful woman wanted was to get laid, she would have no problem finding somebody. She doesn't have to settle. She can take her pick. I think it works out best for men to confine their hitting to someone in their own league. They are much more likely to get some interest. Hitting on a woman that is out of your league is likely to result in zero success. How do you know your league? People dont walk around with signs sayig im a 6 out of 10 Obviosuly if your overweight bald old or just a normal guy youre not getting a model but if were tlaking normal everyday people its not easy to know your "league"
iris219 Posted July 14, 2011 Posted July 14, 2011 How do you know your league? People dont walk around with signs sayig im a 6 out of 10 Obviosuly if your overweight bald old or just a normal guy youre not getting a model but if were tlaking normal everyday people its not easy to know your "league" If you're a "normal everyday person" then that's who you will have the most success dating--other "normal everyday people." It's really not that hard to determine who you'll have the greatest chance with (and I don't mean just based on looks).
bac Posted July 14, 2011 Posted July 14, 2011 How do you know your league? People dont walk around with signs sayig im a 6 out of 10 Obviosuly if your overweight bald old or just a normal guy youre not getting a model but if were tlaking normal everyday people its not easy to know your "league" Your league is a combination of all your qualities on the scale from 1 to 10:): looks, age, physical/emotional health, interests, education, intelligence, beliefs, success, family background, wealth, and many other things.The combination should match the combination of qualities of your partner. Obviosuly if you are overweight bald old but you are very wealthy you can get a model. It is easy to know your "league", you just choose people who are like you. For example, if you are a high school graduate, a girl who is a high school graduate (not a girl with medical/law school degree) is your best choice if you want a serious relationship and a rapport. If you are doing pot or vodka several times per day, a girl who is into pot or vodka is your best choice.
Author Sanman Posted July 15, 2011 Author Posted July 15, 2011 Your league is a combination of all your qualities on the scale from 1 to 10:): looks, age, physical/emotional health, interests, education, intelligence, beliefs, success, family background, wealth, and many other things.The combination should match the combination of qualities of your partner. Obviosuly if you are overweight bald old but you are very wealthy you can get a model. It is easy to know your "league", you just choose people who are like you. For example, if you are a high school graduate, a girl who is a high school graduate (not a girl with medical/law school degree) is your best choice if you want a serious relationship and a rapport. If you are doing pot or vodka several times per day, a girl who is into pot or vodka is your best choice. Yes and no. It isn't like the guys some of these posters are talking about are not rich. The truth is that they do not know and this is a purely physical issue because they are not getting to know the guy 'who is not in their league'.
Els Posted July 15, 2011 Posted July 15, 2011 So, I have heard women complain about this on here on multiple threads. I am asking the opposite question: what does that old bald guy have to lose by asking you out? Sure, you and the next 50 attractive women may turn him down. However, 51 may have daddy issues and want revenge on an ex for cheating. Then he wins. So, ladies, where is the downside for this guy if he hits on you? Worst thing that seems to happen in my book is he is exactly where he started. How the heck is the bolded 'winning'? Do you really want to be with a woman who's with you just to get revenge on an ex, just because she's hot? That's really sad.
rafallus Posted July 15, 2011 Posted July 15, 2011 Your league is a combination of all your qualities on the scale from 1 to 10:): looks, age, physical/emotional health, interests, education, intelligence, beliefs, success, family background, wealth, and many other things.The combination should match the combination of qualities of your partner. Obviosuly if you are overweight bald old but you are very wealthy you can get a model. It is easy to know your "league", you just choose people who are like you. For example, if you are a high school graduate, a girl who is a high school graduate (not a girl with medical/law school degree) is your best choice if you want a serious relationship and a rapport. If you are doing pot or vodka several times per day, a girl who is into pot or vodka is your best choice. It's not really a league. It's called "people with similar interests". "Leagues" implicate that some people are inherently superior to others, usually solely because of looks, (I often hear guys saying "she's out of your league", not necessarily to me, though they didn't ever even talk to the girl and only think so, because "she's hot" ). From there, you have 2 steps to eugenics...
GoodOnPaper Posted July 15, 2011 Posted July 15, 2011 It is easy to know your "league", you just choose people who are like you. For example, if you are a high school graduate, a girl who is a high school graduate (not a girl with medical/law school degree) is your best choice if you want a serious relationship and a rapport. I don't know if this really applies as generally as common sense would dictate. My experience could certainly be an exception but the women I knew from high school through graduate school seemed to intentionally seek "opposites-attract" relationships -- maybe they are supposed to be more exciting, I don't know. As much as I wanted it, I was never able to find someone "like me" who was interested. Regarding the OP, I don't see a downside for a guy who wants to hit on a woman that he perceives to be in a higher "league" -- if he has the right kind of mental approach to it. A lot of guys respond positively to the challenge of landing someone that most men would drool over. Personally, even if we entered the Twilight Zone and someone with model-quality looks was interested in me, I'd never be able to let my guard down with her and it would eventually drive me crazy.
bac Posted July 15, 2011 Posted July 15, 2011 Yes and no. It isn't like the guys some of these posters are talking about are not rich. The truth is that they do not know and this is a purely physical issue because they are not getting to know the guy 'who is not in their league'. It is not a physical issue. It takes to look at a guy once or 5 minutes on the first date to figure out what guy's education, job, wealth, looks, interests, health, personality are. If I am dating online, I calculate guy's league by emails before meeting him. When I meet guys from online who do not like to email and answer questions before the first meeting, I reject most of them and I guess it hurts feelings of some guys. I have no idea why men prefer to get rejected instead of sending a few emails about themselves before the first meeting.
KathyM Posted July 15, 2011 Posted July 15, 2011 How do you know your league? People dont walk around with signs sayig im a 6 out of 10 Obviosuly if your overweight bald old or just a normal guy youre not getting a model but if were tlaking normal everyday people its not easy to know your "league" I think it's pretty easy to compare yourself to others and get an idea of how you rate in comparison. I think it's pretty standard knowledge of what constitutes attractive for the most part. A good physique--not too thin or overweight. Nice facial features.
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