oaks Posted July 14, 2011 Posted July 14, 2011 That is really odd she so fashion conscious to buy the hottest brand purses, etc. then couldn't wash her hair and dress decently that day. Maybe she doesn't care what the OP would think about her appearance. She's already won her man, and she doesn't need to impress the OP or get her approval. I'm sure she looks a million dollars in his eyes when they go out on a date.
Nexus One Posted July 14, 2011 Posted July 14, 2011 1. Stop torturing yourself by meeting up with him, especially now that he has a girlfriend and brings her along to meet you. 2. Find yourself a boyfriend you are sexually attracted to, as you mentioned you guys didn't have sex after a certain point. Make sure to go completely NC on your ex, as that wouldn't be fair to your new boyfriend. What he is doing, i.e. letting his girlfriend meet his ex is not fair to either of you in my opinion. What is he expecting, that you all become superbestfriends?
Author irma Posted July 14, 2011 Author Posted July 14, 2011 The reason I spoke with one of his friends is he is also my friend and we were arranging a surprise party for his sister when I brought up the topic of my ex's girlfriend. When he met her last week he said he thought she looked really ill and and she only had a few sips of one drink compared to their four or five drinks that night. She hardly said a word all night as well. I found myself stickingup for her during this conversation and said she might be tired or have a long term illness. But we both agreed something's not right. The stiff about her being high maintenance also comes from our friend who said my ex has complained about this to him a couple of times. Nexus One - thanks for the advice but as I've known my ex for ages now I will still continue to keep in contact with him. Don't want to get back with him as the attraction has gone.
Nexus One Posted July 14, 2011 Posted July 14, 2011 Nexus One - thanks for the advice but as I've known my ex for ages now I will still continue to keep in contact with him. Don't want to get back with him as the attraction has gone. Not sure what your future boyfriend will think of that, perhaps you'll find one who will see no problem that you meetup with your ex, who knows. But my personal stance on this is that even if you are to be trusted, then you can still give your partner the wrong idea by meeting up with your ex, so in the case of a new partner cutting contact with your ex is a sign of respect for your partner and for your relationship. But that's just my opinion on it.
Author irma Posted July 14, 2011 Author Posted July 14, 2011 Irma will cheat on her next Man with her EX. I bet my rubles on that.... No way! I would never cheat. I don't want him back I'm just curious about his new relationship as I find it a bit odd - and I'm not the only one. I think I'm just too shallow to overlook the looks and weird personality thing and I'm not accustomed to Sanman's male perspective. Do men really start relationships just because they can get sex? My friend thinks he's on the rebound from us and is just with her for the sex. I was never into open and public displays of affection and I think he gets off on having people see him and her kiss each other when they're out but seriuosly it was over the top. She was almost sat on his lap, tongue down his throat in the middle of the day surrounded by women together lunching with their babies!
Nexus One Posted July 14, 2011 Posted July 14, 2011 Do men really start relationships just because they can get sex? Yeah some guys do.
Author irma Posted July 14, 2011 Author Posted July 14, 2011 Yeah some guys do. And how often do these become long term or even marriage? Are they not just living a lie if the only attraction is easy, regular sex? I'm not presuming this is the case with my ex just wondering....
stillafool Posted July 14, 2011 Posted July 14, 2011 (edited) [quote=irma;3510289 I was so nervous as I still hold a little flame for him! C'mon Irma, you still want this guy and you know it. Also if the sex is good enough between two people, that alone will make you want a relationship. Edited July 14, 2011 by stillafool
Mr. Savage Posted July 14, 2011 Posted July 14, 2011 I think his new girlfriend has an eating disorder of some kind. It would explain the ill look to her. The baggy clothes to cover up her bone thin body. The frail looking hair. The bags under her eyes. The only taking a few sips of a drink during a whole night out (worried about the calories).
Casablanca Posted July 14, 2011 Posted July 14, 2011 To the OP, we are all a little vain and selfish deep on the inside; especially after being dumped by someone you love, the least you can hope for is someone "not as good as you" to follow. I havent read all of the pages, but I bet the OP doesnt wish unhappiness on her ex, she just found something to make her feel a little better about herself, and she really needs that....it was a pretty low blow for him to ask you to meet her and really dumb I remember seeing the guy my ex dated after me, all I could do was chuckle as I knew the guy....it didnt last too long, but I couldn't believe it, but made me feel a little better
Woggle Posted July 14, 2011 Posted July 14, 2011 Maybe he sees qualities in her that make her attractive to him. You know nothing about her and she could have been not made up that day. I like it when a woman is secure enough in herself to be willing to go out looking plain like that.
Johnny85 Posted July 14, 2011 Posted July 14, 2011 Sorry to say 8 is not exactly thin.... A size 8 is attractive on a woman. And this is coming from a fit male!!!
eerie_reverie Posted July 15, 2011 Posted July 15, 2011 Maybe he's just banging her and has no plans to seriously commit, she's just easy company for him after the emotionally draining relationship he had with you.
Sanman Posted July 15, 2011 Posted July 15, 2011 And how often do these become long term or even marriage? Are they not just living a lie if the only attraction is easy, regular sex? I'm not presuming this is the case with my ex just wondering.... It may become a real thing and it may not. Like I said, he can figure that out later on. He may discover he really likes her, but in all likelihood it will be a few months of great sex before the fighting and lack of sex forces a break up. The bottom line is that the average guy does not have the choice of available sex without a relationship like the average woman can have. He may find a FWB if he is lucky, but that usually means he is an ex or is much better looking than the girl. Thus, a relationship/dating is the easiest route to regular sex for a guy.
Author irma Posted July 15, 2011 Author Posted July 15, 2011 Maybe he's just banging her and has no plans to seriously commit, she's just easy company for him after the emotionally draining relationship he had with you. Our relationship was not emotionally draining on either of us. We broke up, are still on good terms which is something we wouldn't be if it was. Anyway I called him today to say that I didn't think it right for me to meet up with the two of them at the moment. I said I didn't want to stand in the way of their relationship and that she might not be happy about it despite saying she is. My ex was annoyed and said he didn't even know for sure if she was going to turn up or not and that when we broke up we agreed to be friends. He says I am changing my mind now. So not on such good terms any more!!! So I said I WOULD meet them but only for a short while. HE said great and is looking forward to it. But then said He would check it's OK with his girlfriend. So she didn't even know... I don't want to jeopardise their relationship in any way so I did what I thought would be best. I am shocked at his response. I find the WHOLE thing strange now not just her!!
stillafool Posted July 18, 2011 Posted July 18, 2011 Don't go. You don't owe him ANYTHING! It's clear to me you are uncomfortable in that situation so why put yourself in it. This guy probably wants the "ego feed" of two girls together, possibly wanting him. It's not a good idea to try to remain friends with an ex, especially when your feelings are still rather raw. I think he is selfish and only thinking about what will make him feel good. He is not thinking about you or the other girls feelings.
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