poorguy Posted July 13, 2011 Posted July 13, 2011 Your feelings will be all over the place for quite some time. You'll feel better, then you'll feel like crap. You'll feel better again, and then you'll feel like crap again. It's part of the healing process. When you are over it, you won't even realize it, because you will be so immersed in your new life that you won't even notice. A bit of advice, try not to ask yourself (or get hung up on) questions that have no answer. Such as the one you asked, "How can I be forgotten about so quickly?" Those types of questions will never bring you answers, relief, or comfort. If you are going to ask any questions at all, they should be, "What did I do wrong?" "What can I do better next time?" "What have I learned about myself?" "What red flags do I know to look out for next time?" Things that you can answer yourself. Those will bring you the most optimism and comfort. Not to mention, it always feels good when you learn something beneficial. I agree with this!!! This is 200% realistic and what just happens. So keeping that in mind, what you have to do is treat yourself (yes you will be whole again)...like you did when you first met her/him...Now is the perfect time to do that!!! Get back to you...Remember that night when things were new???? She was amazing...you were amazing. Things are new again...just in a different way,.well without her to put a point on it. Get back and pay attention to the love of your life..YOU!!! Without you, there can never be a WE!!! Pretty much everyone here on LS is amazing...Im in the U.S. , but see people in the UK going through the exact same thing...bottom line is people are people...everyone hurts..you dont have to die to go to hell, but when you get there keep walking, with your chin up
English-Rose Posted July 13, 2011 Posted July 13, 2011 Trust me, he hasn't forgotten you. Not possible! But the thing is men are different IMO and seem to need another woman pretty fast, whereas the women I have known who've gone through break ups seem to spend a good bit longer licking their wounds and are more cautious about embarking on new relationships - once bitten twice shy syndrome. My ex told me that the act of meeting other women had nothing to do with him being over me but said he had to move forward in his life and if I wasn't able to give him what he needed then he had to cut loose and find someone who could. So he did. I understand why but it makes me so sad.... With a little patience on his part we coups have literally had it all!
Author TaintedHeart Posted July 13, 2011 Author Posted July 13, 2011 What is meeting other women so quickly got to do with moving on in life? Please read the tread I've just posted, it's called 'What a joke' x
English-Rose Posted July 13, 2011 Posted July 13, 2011 In my ex's case he couldn't cope with being lonely. He had split up with his ex wife 6 months prior to meeting me (she was cheating on him) and he moved out of his marital home, leaving her with their kids who he dotes on. So when he and I split he was a mess and his quick fix was to find someone new. He's obviously very needy and insecure and, according to his best mate, unable to be on his own. For me, moving on in my life is less about finding a new relationship, and more about improving other areas of my lifestyle, eg doing more fun stuff with my friends. I too went to see the movie Bridesmaids with some girlfriends, it was just what the doctor ordered!!
MissMoni Posted July 13, 2011 Posted July 13, 2011 I graduated with a degree in psychology and all the above symptoms are pretty normal - I remember reading an article about how the chemicals that are relased in our brain during a breakup are actually the same chemicals that are released in repsonse to physical pain. So, there is some truth in feeling "heart-broken". And that explains why we go into autopilot, and why we don't have appetites, etc. You aren't alone, Tainted Heart! When my ex broke up with me, I cried every single day for two straight months. I also lost 8 pounds in 3 days, was failing exams in subjects I am a whiz in, and couldn't drag myself out of bed unless my friends forced me to. Every day I returned to my dorm, I literally sat at my desk doing nothing for hours, staring off into space. It was a really dark time for me. The good news is - it got better!!! And you will get better too! I am at 9 months and while I will not say I am completely over my ex, I am pretty darn close, I think. Each day gets easier, but it's what you do in your time will heal you. And you will heal a lot faster if you cut off contact, believe me. I wish I did.
EricaH329 Posted July 14, 2011 Posted July 14, 2011 Please read my other threads, you will probably understand this better You're pretty helpful Is there any one in particular you wanted me to read? There are a few of them. And thank you
Author TaintedHeart Posted July 14, 2011 Author Posted July 14, 2011 Is there any one in particular you wanted me to read? There are a few of them. And thank you Erm, no, take your pick
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