EgoJoe Posted July 11, 2011 Posted July 11, 2011 I'm writing this because despite a lack of an answer and a lack of a response thus far (and probably for a very long time) I feel ok more than full of dread or angry at myself. I left a voicemail that said, "Hey, I really don't like how things ended. I was very angry. I'd like to have a civil conversation in the next couple of days. I turned my Facebook back on you can message me there or call me. Uh. Hope you're having a good summer." At first I thought she'll say something even if she's pissed and then I realized that my angry letter, other contact etc. had done it's work. However, I gave no ground and simply tried to make peace. My intent for the call was just that and yet afterwards bargaining picked up but I'm doing ok. Thanks to Sun_Moon and Homebrew for the support. I almost broke it again earlier just to say, "Even though you treated me bad and did all this etc. I just wanted to wish you well." instead I spoke to someone else and got some support. If she had wanted to talk to me, she would have and if she had wanted to have a civil conversation she would have responded.
TheHurtProcess Posted July 11, 2011 Posted July 11, 2011 I'm writing this because despite a lack of an answer and a lack of a response thus far (and probably for a very long time) I feel ok more than full of dread or angry at myself. I left a voicemail that said, "Hey, I really don't like how things ended. I was very angry. I'd like to have a civil conversation in the next couple of days. I turned my Facebook back on you can message me there or call me. Uh. Hope you're having a good summer." At first I thought she'll say something even if she's pissed and then I realized that my angry letter, other contact etc. had done it's work. However, I gave no ground and simply tried to make peace. My intent for the call was just that and yet afterwards bargaining picked up but I'm doing ok. Thanks to Sun_Moon and Homebrew for the support. I almost broke it again earlier just to say, "Even though you treated me bad and did all this etc. I just wanted to wish you well." instead I spoke to someone else and got some support. If she had wanted to talk to me, she would have and if she had wanted to have a civil conversation she would have responded. Yes sir. Just stick to NC. It's your best bet and only option at this time. I'm going throught the same BS. I'm on week 4 of NC at the moment. Don't feel bad, we all consider trying to contact them, several times thought the early days/weeks of NC. I've thought about contacting my ex several times up to this point. However, if she had something to say, she can contact me. The phone, email, facebook, and the many other forms of contact both work two ways. If she really wanted to, she would have done it already. Therefore there's no point in me breaking NC and killing myself over someone who could obviously care less. She did the damage and the damage is already done. It's up to her to undo it if she feels it's worth it. She can contact me. She can also show up at my door, get on her knees, plead, cry and beg for my forgiveness while she's at it, haha. I've done my bit. There's nothing left that I can do. The same goes for you bud.
aussie_bloke Posted July 11, 2011 Posted July 11, 2011 She did the damage and the damage is already done. It's up to her to undo it if she feels it's worth it. She can contact me. She can also show up at my door, get on her knees, plead, cry and beg for my forgiveness while she's at it, haha. I've done my bit. There's nothing left that I can do. The same goes for you bud. Thats great advice, the thing that sucks is its easy to read and know its the right advice, but its completely different to feel it! I wish I was at that point! Egojoe, I know it probably doesnt help but I think you're doing pretty damn well considering! Keep goin mate
TheHurtProcess Posted July 11, 2011 Posted July 11, 2011 Thats great advice, the thing that sucks is its easy to read and know its the right advice, but its completely different to feel it! I wish I was at that point! Egojoe, I know it probably doesnt help but I think you're doing pretty damn well considering! Keep goin mate Definitely. I wish I could do more than just offer advice over the internet. However, that's all we can really do with the limited resources we have here. I wish I had the power to do more... I'd take away everyone's pain if I only had that power. I seriously wish I could take everyone on this site out individually for a cup of coffee and sit there and have a good old fashioned face to face / heart to heart.
Kuite09 Posted July 11, 2011 Posted July 11, 2011 Definitely. I wish I could do more than just offer advice over the internet. However, that's all we can really do with the limited resources we have here. I wish I had the power to do more... I'd take away everyone's pain if I only had that power. I seriously wish I could take everyone on this site out individually for a cup of coffee and sit there and have a good old fashioned face to face / heart to heart. Yea, wish I can do the same too. It gets hard, every day is a new day but its hard cuz one day you may be feeling okay,when the next you feel like crap.
CaliBabe Posted July 11, 2011 Posted July 11, 2011 Stick with NC let the emotions die down a little before you guys contact one another. Try to be as emotionally strong and indifferent as possible.
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