brenicdou Posted July 11, 2011 Posted July 11, 2011 I have been with my boyfriend for 3 years now, 3 years that i thought were amazing. I just about three months ago had a beautiful baby boy, and i love him more than words can express. About 3 weeks ago i found out from a girl i used to work with that her and my bf messed around for months and that she didnt know that he was with me and he broke it off with her when he found out i was pregnant. (btw he was messing around with her while SHE was pregnant.) So this was about a year ago when this stopped but i'm JUST finding out. I confronted him the moment I found out. The three weeks we've spent together since has been HELL for me. i cant get it off my mind, it takes xanex to keep me from having panic attacks all throughout the day bc when i think about it i cant calm down. i love him and i want us to work but i dont know how much longer i can do this, i too think about it when i wake up, when i go to sleep. how do you get past something like this, i want to be with him but the angry side of me wants to go off and do the same he did to me so he knows how it feels. I did something tonight that i feel like i dont even regret, not something too bad but something i feel that i shouldnt have done. did you ever try to use revenge on him to make yourself feel better?? I dont know if thats the road i should choose....i'm heart broken and lost and feel like i'm going crazy. is there anyway i can just make this all go away??
oldguy Posted July 11, 2011 Posted July 11, 2011 First of all; what he did was WRONG & you doing that will just lower your standards & will untimely lead to the destruction of any hopes of this relationship lasting. You don't want to do that. Second; Your 18 & your a mom, what other goals do you have now?
linwood Posted July 12, 2011 Posted July 12, 2011 Pregnant at 18 is a bigger problem than a boyfriend who fools around. I`d dump him now and start preparing for the child without him because that`s likely how it`s going to be in the long run. Also Xanax and pregnancy don`t mix, stop taking it.
Sazerac Posted July 13, 2011 Posted July 13, 2011 Um...Linwood, she's not pregnant, she had the baby already three months ago. What you need to do, Brenicdou, is to make decisions that are the best for you and your child...forget the loser. Establish legal paternity with him and make him step up to the plate financially for your baby, whether or not you stay with him (I strongly counsel against that; he's proven his utter lack of character).
NervisPervis Posted July 13, 2011 Posted July 13, 2011 Whatever you decide to do for yourself, I wish you luck. But after you get settled, go on a Middle School speaking tour and tell all the kids what a HUGE mistake it is to get pregnant in high school. Make sure they know that EVERYONE who is single with a child thought their relationship was "different" than the 90% that fail.
whatisinfidelity Posted July 13, 2011 Posted July 13, 2011 Sorry for your pain. Pls keep calm before you make any decision. You have your baby and bright future. You have a long long way to go , full with joyful and love. I have been with my boyfriend for 3 years now, 3 years that i thought were amazing. I just about three months ago had a beautiful baby boy, and i love him more than words can express. About 3 weeks ago i found out from a girl i used to work with that her and my bf messed around for months and that she didnt know that he was with me and he broke it off with her when he found out i was pregnant. (btw he was messing around with her while SHE was pregnant.) So this was about a year ago when this stopped but i'm JUST finding out. I confronted him the moment I found out. The three weeks we've spent together since has been HELL for me. i cant get it off my mind, it takes xanex to keep me from having panic attacks all throughout the day bc when i think about it i cant calm down. i love him and i want us to work but i dont know how much longer i can do this, i too think about it when i wake up, when i go to sleep. how do you get past something like this, i want to be with him but the angry side of me wants to go off and do the same he did to me so he knows how it feels. I did something tonight that i feel like i dont even regret, not something too bad but something i feel that i shouldnt have done. did you ever try to use revenge on him to make yourself feel better?? I dont know if thats the road i should choose....i'm heart broken and lost and feel like i'm going crazy. is there anyway i can just make this all go away??
bigmomma1974 Posted July 14, 2011 Posted July 14, 2011 congrads on the little baby boy. As for the boyfriend your feelings are normal. It may take some time to work through this if you want it to work with him. getting even wont solve a thing It will more likely cause more issues and cause you to break up/ take some time for you and the baby and think about what you want to do; If you want to work it out with your boyfriend you both need to sit down and discuss this. I would also let him know that if this ever happens again taht you will leave.
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