Ron Mexico Posted July 10, 2011 Posted July 10, 2011 (edited) Im a private investigator...former cop....I didnt want to but i had to lie to a girl i was sort of seeing, bc i couldnt tell her about a situation where i was helping an undercover police officer gather information to get her boss at a bar she worked at in some trouble for illegal things he was doing..... anyways i met her along the way 2 months after i had started my job at the bar she was a dancer at, Id frequent the place regularly and became pretty good friends with the owner and he introduced me to her. We hit it off instantly once I realized she wasnt doing bad things like the other dancers and went to college and used to have a real job. We started texting and started hanging out,she said she didnt want to date but we went on 2-3 dates a week and hooked up regularly for 4 month......but as a private investigator,4 months i lied to her about who i was, not my actions towards her.... told her after everything happened and the investigation was over and he was busted so to be 100% honest with her and now she wont even talk to me or answer my text messages.....what do i do now....I miss her so much and, i know i hurt her but she wont give me a chance and i yes I lied, but it was my job.....and now Im seriously contemplating a new career bc this has put so much stress on me these last few weeks of not talking to her and her not answering any of my texts in forever, Ive been put under so much stress from this, its like I did what was right but it was wrong to her....I really cant do this job again and maybe meet another girl and lie to her too Edited July 10, 2011 by Ron Mexico
Author Ron Mexico Posted July 10, 2011 Author Posted July 10, 2011 Im really getting depressed here....Ive never felt so bad about doing my job
fltc Posted July 10, 2011 Posted July 10, 2011 Sorry but your job required you to do as you did, you knew that when you signed on. Now you need to sit down and decided if you could go through the same thing again because you might very well have to at some future time. Consider that you hurt the woman you cared about but you also helped get rid of a criminal. I know you're hurting now but you did the right thing in my opinion so I'll say thank you, well done!
Exit Posted July 10, 2011 Posted July 10, 2011 In a career like that, it may have been in your best interest from day 1 to make a promise to yourself not to get involved with anyone related to the cases you are working on, because this is the type of situation it leads to. What upset her about it? Was she just friends with the guy and she doesn't like that you investigated him? Did him getting busted make her lose her job there? Or just the idea that you were lying in the first place? There was really no way around it, you obviously couldn't have risked telling her as an employee what you were really there for. This is definitely a unique situation and there isn't a whole lot of advice to be given. I would just leave her alone and she'll need to decide if she can come to an understanding about why you did what you did, or she'll just never want to talk to you again. Let the decision come from her. In the meantime, I would make sure not to get involved with someone on a case again, or change careers if you really feel it's that difficult to manage.
moodoo Posted July 10, 2011 Posted July 10, 2011 She was mad that I lied to her so long and she wants nothing to do with the police or getting anyone in trouble bc her boss was a dangerous guy.I just don't get why she won't even answer a text and say I hate u for lying to me or whatever she's just not responding to me and it's so frustrating
leoc1973 Posted July 11, 2011 Posted July 11, 2011 I am sure she is upset about you lieing to her but its probably more that you helped put all her friends in jail. Or get them in really bad trouble at least. I am not trying to sound like a jerk cause a lot of us have broken hearts on this site but what did you think was going to happen? If you were special to her then just somehow tell her where you stand and if she cares enough she will be back. Humans are really good at making excuses for people they care about. Give her some time I am sure she is really confused right now. Good luck man!
moodoo Posted July 11, 2011 Posted July 11, 2011 This is what she just texted me.....Look your not the person I thought you were. I don't need someone like you in my life so please stop calling and texting.
Art_Critic Posted July 11, 2011 Posted July 11, 2011 Boy.. I hope you don't do undercover police work the same way you post on LS Dude.. maybe you should explain this ?.. it looks like you got busted....
moodoo Posted July 11, 2011 Posted July 11, 2011 No computer and iPhone I forgot my login on my phone bc it's saved on computer see my last post it's abt a dancer
Art_Critic Posted July 11, 2011 Posted July 11, 2011 (edited) so i met this great girl through one of my friends 2 years ago and we dated for 2 years she's now 24 and im 22. 12th December 2008 So,this girl i like, she's 25, im 25 17th August 2010 (I own a couple restaraunts) and young (29) 1st July 2011 I thought you were a PI and a former COP ? Are you 25 or 29 ? I understand the need to keep anonymity but it seems you don't know how old you are. Edited July 11, 2011 by Art_Critic
Art_Critic Posted July 11, 2011 Posted July 11, 2011 I've been going there since I was 16, so nearly 15 years and this has never happened to me. That puts you at almost 31 years old 1st July 2011 i hear you....i cant explain it im not a kid im 26 years old 28th December 2010
Recommended Posts