rita1967 Posted July 10, 2011 Posted July 10, 2011 hello. my boyfriend and i have been broken up for about a month and a half now. at first i had no intention on ever getting back with him, but now i'm doubting my decision. i'm thinking we may be able work through things. i'm still very much in love with him and he's very much in love with me. he can say it all he wants, but now i'm at the point where he needs to prove it. he moved away for a while and is going to be coming back in a month or so. he told me if i wanted to work things out he would be more than willing. i'm so confused, he did hurt me pretty badly. he needs to work on himself though, so we're currently not speaking for that reason after talking off and on since then. i love him so much and want us to be happy together. call me naive, but i just need advice.
Chuck Bartowski Posted July 10, 2011 Posted July 10, 2011 Rita, 1st and foremost, follow your heart but don't leave it unguarded. Stay strong and read as many posts as you can on LS. Some are better than others. And remember that only you know everything about your situation so only you will know how to proceed. My ex and I split 2 months ago today and I would love the opportunity you have. Unfortunately she decided that 8 years together was easily dismissed in 2 weeks and started a new relationship and she never took any time to grieve, reflect on her contribution to the demise of our relationship or to heal. Make sure both you and your ex do this so you can grow as a couple and take it slow. I wish you the best on this difficult journey.
Shaun-Dro Posted July 10, 2011 Posted July 10, 2011 hello. my boyfriend and i have been broken up for about a month and a half now. at first i had no intention on ever getting back with him, but now i'm doubting my decision. i'm thinking we may be able work through things. i'm still very much in love with him and he's very much in love with me. he can say it all he wants, but now i'm at the point where he needs to prove it. he moved away for a while and is going to be coming back in a month or so. he told me if i wanted to work things out he would be more than willing. i'm so confused, he did hurt me pretty badly. he needs to work on himself though, so we're currently not speaking for that reason after talking off and on since then. i love him so much and want us to be happy together. call me naive, but i just need advice. Please go back to him so he can treat you bad some more, I love it!
leoc1973 Posted July 10, 2011 Posted July 10, 2011 Listen to you heart I am in the same situation with my ex but I am on the other end. She broke up with me and for a while I thought maybe she would miss me and come back but she never did. We hardly talk either she says she loves me more than anything but it just isn't going to work. She got a really good job in NYC and left me here. I am just shy of finishing school and you can't find a job in ny without an education. She was unwilling to wait a little longer and try the long distance thing for a while. I guess that is what hurts the most. I would have liked to think that I was worth the wait but I guess not. I know down the road she will probably regret it I treated her very well and we were very much in love at one point. I guess she just couldn't deal with her friends thinking I was a "loser" any more. I have a full time job and trying to finish school but some women only care about a bread winner. I currently met a new girl who is also very educated and she looks at me with that same adoration that my ex used to. It feels nice for a change. She also said that she thought the social class thing went out with king george the 3rd. lol. I feel the same. I dont' know what your situation is right now or why you broke up with him but you don't let one of your great loves get away without at least giving him a chance to fix what went wrong. Unless he was abusive or a cheater. Good luck with your second chance and careful cause if the right woman comes along he will forget about getting you back.
wilsonx Posted July 11, 2011 Posted July 11, 2011 he told me if i wanted to work things out he would be more than willing I'm going to give you opposite advice as everyone else. Listen to your head, not your heart. I was in your shoes. I got a second chance. Only to find out that I was just an emotional crutch from one relationship to the next. Read what you typed. This is key. This is not a second chance, this is a string along. If he's the dumper, he should be apologizing to you for hurting you and destroying the relationship. He has not done it yet. He's putting the ball in your court and it should stay in his. Im going to tell you that the second time you get dumped, hurts way worse because you haven't had time to heal from the first time. If I was you, stick to NC and wait for "IM SO SORRY I HURT YOU I WANT TO GET BACK TOGETHER AND I WILL DO ANYTHING IT TAKES." Until this happens, stay NC, work on healing from the last breakup, making yourself better, and moving on. By the time he really realizes and does this, you should be moved on and onto someone better then him
Author rita1967 Posted July 11, 2011 Author Posted July 11, 2011 he has apologized and said he wants to get back together. he told me he's still head over heels for me and doesn't want to be with anyone else. he needs to work on himself right now though without the help of me. i guess i'm just going to play it by ear. see if he contacts me when he gets back to town and if i've moved on. we've decided to not keep in touch for right now on a regular basis, it's pointless. in the meantime, we're going to work on ourselves and see where we're at down the road.
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