Ross MwcFan Posted July 9, 2011 Posted July 9, 2011 I was wondering. When a guy does have a gf or is in a relationship, is it still possible for him to end up in the friend zone?
sm1tten Posted July 9, 2011 Posted July 9, 2011 Yep; for example. if the infatuation stage never goes beyond that, dude will get friend-zoned when she decides to look for someone else.
janica Posted July 9, 2011 Posted July 9, 2011 Yes you could become a friend when someone else better comes along.
carhill Posted July 9, 2011 Posted July 9, 2011 Often heard on LS: 'We live like roommates' 'ILYBINILWY' So yes, regardless of what the relationship appears like from the outside (LTR/cohabit/M), it can be very different on the inside.
somedude81 Posted July 9, 2011 Posted July 9, 2011 I don't think girlfriends friendzone their boyfriends. What does happen is that they might lose interest and just dump him. The worst case scenario is that they'll stay with the guy and just cheat on him.
carhill Posted July 9, 2011 Posted July 9, 2011 To me, the 'friendzone' is 'you are/seem like a good person and I care about you but you don't make my vagina wet/dick hard. You meet my needs and wants but I have no romantic love for you. I can love you as a friend'. It isn't uncommon in M's for this to happen where social status, financial status and/or child status keeps the partner in the M physically, but they've checked out emotionally/romantically/sexually. When a new prospect comes along which tickles their genitals and if that tickle exceeds their desire to retain the status quo, they leave. The time in between the decision and the paperwork catching up (the new prospect) is the 'friendzone'. Listen to the complaints of enough married women (I say MW because they complain far more about their M's to me than men do), especially those who cheat, and one gets a sense of the commonalities. Yes, such people are perhaps extreme examples but they are the canaries in the coal mine, in that their boundaries are low enough where they act out on their emotions in a clear and transparent way (to anyone who is disclosed). Men do this too (compartmentalize relationships, which 'friendzone' is a subset of) but I've never dated men nor been married to them so don't know how it 'appears' from the other side. My version of the 'friend zone' was 'my love died one day at a time' to the point where my exW was no more than a friend and a lot less than my good friends, the ones who remained by my side during difficult times. Part of that process included the perception of her distancing herself emotionally/romantically/sexually so it is entirely possible and likely that my loss of love was a response to her 'friendzoning' me prior, IDK. It just wasn't financially/emotionally expedient to divorce her at that moment in time, so I 'friendzoned' her. Was that wrong? I think so. I think we both deserved better, and now we have it. I see the friendzone as an emotional process which is the most transparent when a man approaches a woman with romantic intent. It can, however, occur at any time and with either gender. Clear and transparent communication usually obviates any ambiguity about the friendzone but humans are notable in their often nebulous ways of communicating with each other. Life goes on.
somedude81 Posted July 9, 2011 Posted July 9, 2011 OK, so that makes sense. Getting friendzoned by a partner or putting them there when breaking up isn't really a viable option. Though for most relationships, it just means the relationship is over.
kalikula Posted July 9, 2011 Posted July 9, 2011 I don't think so, to me being in the friend zone means that someone would never consider you a romantic partner. People can dump each other because they no longer feel a spark, but they've already had a romantic/sexual relationship, so I don't think that you can be in the "friend zone" once you've already had that.
thehead Posted July 9, 2011 Posted July 9, 2011 ^^This absolutely. I understand friendzone to mean they aren't interested in anything more than a friendship from the word Go. You're either in or just a friend.
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