bluenightowl Posted July 9, 2011 Posted July 9, 2011 What does it mean when you have sex with someone, assume you are exclusive, give her lots of attention, who then later says things are moving too fast and she still wants to date other people yet still wants to date you? Would you go out on that date knowing you're had sex and knowing she is dating other people OR just go no contact and move on. Also keeping in mind you are looking for a LTR.
Author bluenightowl Posted July 9, 2011 Author Posted July 9, 2011 Probably her attraction to you is fading. For sure this is happening. No big deal, just want to know if I should NEXT the situation or just play it cool.
snug.bunny Posted July 9, 2011 Posted July 9, 2011 "Things are moving too fast and I want to date other people" Is pretty straightforward. Equals ------------> Open Relationship.
Author bluenightowl Posted July 9, 2011 Author Posted July 9, 2011 Depends on how much ridiculous crap I have to listen to to get sex from her, and how physically attracted I am. If she isn't manipulative or high maintenance, would continue to date, if she's a PITA (or PETA lol) probably move on to others. She is very attractive and not manipulative, with one possible exception of dating other people after having sex with me. But then we never talked about anything. It is tough because she is great but we fooled around really easy and we barely know one another. I just tend to not date anyone else after sex and she clearly feels differently or is losing interest.
Fondue Posted July 9, 2011 Posted July 9, 2011 This is your cue to continue this relationship as FWB. Just have sex with her and enjoy the ride. Do NOT harbor feelings for her.
Author bluenightowl Posted July 9, 2011 Author Posted July 9, 2011 When I have been in your situation, I make a decision to get myself to the top of the pile or simply move on, can't really help with making that decision in your case, but if possible, rethink your exclusive after sex stance and try to just keep her as a casual connection. Whatever you do, if you feel yourself getting emotionally attached, withdraw a good long way. If had to guess, would imagine she will be fine as long as you don't start making BF or "date me" signs, would call her no more than once a week, no texting, IM email, just a weekly call and make some daytime plans to just hang out and do something non datey. yes, this is tough one, because I think I could handle detaching, but my goal is a LTR not an open relationship or something super casual with sex on the side. I probably could detach.. or ignore her for now instead of telling her I'm moving on and just let her come to me or not. In a sense I've next'd her without saying anything and just start dating other people. That said, I've felt felt there is something good about just stating what you want, decide if you both want the same thing, and if not, just move on.
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