Janey01 Posted July 8, 2011 Posted July 8, 2011 Hi All, I wrote on this forum earlier in the week....thread is http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t286015/ Basically I was with my BF for 10 years and we broke up just over a month ago. Yesterday was the first time that I actually started to feel myself again and have planned a great weekend meeting up with friends instead of staying at home and feeling sorry for myself. As I said in the last post, my BF is not that experienced on the Internet. A few years ago I set up a facebook page for him as some of our friends have moved abroad and I thought it would be a nice gesture for him to keep in touch with them. He was NOT HAPPY:mad: and said whats the points in been so nosey and wanting to know everyones business etc and demanded I close the account. Anyways, I came home yesterday after work to see that he has reactivated this account and has now proceeded to add most of my friends. Some of my close friends have thankfully emailed me and said they rejected his request but I have two questions... 1) Should I block him. We are not friends on facebook but as we already have many mutual friends,some of whom I still keep in regular contact with, I'm awkward about posting things on their site and possibly seen his comments too. 2)Should I be upset at the fact that some of my close friends have accepted his friend request,even thou they know how hurtful he has been to me in the last month i.e. walking out and NC. I'm probably been too paranoid about the whole situation but I would really appreciate some advice, thanks
69ways Posted July 8, 2011 Posted July 8, 2011 ten years is a long time and some of your friends are his also. maybe keeping in contact with your friends is like him keeping a part of you, why you want to ruined that for him by you overanalysing this and making yourself unhappy. he is your ex, is not important what he does not do,maybe in the long run you will also find out who your real friends are this way........ actually i noticed you are not angry with your friends that accepted him but only with him, thats wrong in my opinion because as said, the guy might be hurting and keeping a contact with your friends is just him reaching out....
Author Janey01 Posted July 8, 2011 Author Posted July 8, 2011 ten years is a long time and some of your friends are his also. maybe keeping in contact with your friends is like him keeping a part of you, why you want to ruined that for him by you overanalysing this and making yourself unhappy. he is your ex, is not important what he does not do,maybe in the long run you will also find out who your real friends are this way........ actually i noticed you are not angry with your friends that accepted him but only with him, thats wrong in my opinion because as said, the guy might be hurting and keeping a contact with your friends is just him reaching out.... Thank you 69ways, to be honest Im not too bothered about my girlfriends been freinds with him...at least my close ones have rejected his request. I am trying to get over him and move on and do not want to stay in contact with him. I guess at the moment I am feeling hurt, and anger too as he did just walk out without a dicussion and after 10 years together, I feel I deserve a text or some sort of contact at least. Would you agree its best to block him on facebook. The way I look at it is, if I really need to post something on a mutual friends wall, I can either email or text them.
amethyste Posted July 8, 2011 Posted July 8, 2011 Do all of your friends know who he is? I'm asking because not everybody has a profile pic on Fb, or they're not always using their real name. Some people would accept anyone as a "friend" - do you know if your friends are like this? Anyway, I think you should block him. You don't need to see what and how he's doing, you don't need to see his comments etc.
KathyM Posted July 8, 2011 Posted July 8, 2011 Hi All, I wrote on this forum earlier in the week....thread is http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t286015/ Basically I was with my BF for 10 years and we broke up just over a month ago. Yesterday was the first time that I actually started to feel myself again and have planned a great weekend meeting up with friends instead of staying at home and feeling sorry for myself. As I said in the last post, my BF is not that experienced on the Internet. A few years ago I set up a facebook page for him as some of our friends have moved abroad and I thought it would be a nice gesture for him to keep in touch with them. He was NOT HAPPY:mad: and said whats the points in been so nosey and wanting to know everyones business etc and demanded I close the account. Anyways, I came home yesterday after work to see that he has reactivated this account and has now proceeded to add most of my friends. Some of my close friends have thankfully emailed me and said they rejected his request but I have two questions... 1) Should I block him. We are not friends on facebook but as we already have many mutual friends,some of whom I still keep in regular contact with, I'm awkward about posting things on their site and possibly seen his comments too. 2)Should I be upset at the fact that some of my close friends have accepted his friend request,even thou they know how hurtful he has been to me in the last month i.e. walking out and NC. I'm probably been too paranoid about the whole situation but I would really appreciate some advice, thanks My sister went through the same thing with her X husband. She was hurt every time she saw news of him and what he's doing and who he's seeing that was posted on his facebook page. She blocked him, and now feels much better. I would recommend it. You can't control what your friends do. I wouldn't worry about that part of it.
Author Janey01 Posted July 8, 2011 Author Posted July 8, 2011 Do all of your friends know who he is? I'm asking because not everybody has a profile pic on Fb, or they're not always using their real name. Some people would accept anyone as a "friend" - do you know if your friends are like this? Anyway, I think you should block him. You don't need to see what and how he's doing, you don't need to see his comments etc. Thanks amethyste and yes he does have a profile pic up (an awful one I might add ) and like I said some of my friends would be mutual friends to his so they could see that it is actually him. Im not worried about who adds him or not...WHY...cause I have just blocked him. Now I dont need to see who he is friends with or his comments on friends pages...happy days. Thanks too KathyM for your advice, hope your sister is in a much happier place now.
KathyM Posted July 8, 2011 Posted July 8, 2011 Thanks amethyste and yes he does have a profile pic up (an awful one I might add ) and like I said some of my friends would be mutual friends to his so they could see that it is actually him. Im not worried about who adds him or not...WHY...cause I have just blocked him. Now I dont need to see who he is friends with or his comments on friends pages...happy days. Thanks too KathyM for your advice, hope your sister is in a much happier place now. Yes, she is. She has a new boyfriend that is much more of a match for her than her X ever was.
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