blueskyday Posted July 8, 2011 Posted July 8, 2011 Please guys, just don't do it. The problem is that we women attach a different meaning to it. If I'm looking at a guy who walks by, then maybe I'm still shopping. When I'm in a relationship, other guys don't matter. I don't care if the hottest guy walks by, I'm not checking out his butt. Who cares? Not an option. I guess guys are different, but if we see our guy doing looking at another woman, it creates a bit of jealousy and insecurity. Some of us can think "Would he prefer that? Would he cheat if she gave him the time of day?" If my guy has to stare at the waitresses butt when she walks by, then I just catch his eye when he looks back at me, with a raised eyebrow...like hmmm? I would never smile and say "Wow, she's hot." That kind of invites and rewards that kind of behavior. I'm not one of the guys, sheesh... It's a question of respect. He should respect the ideal of making me feel like I am the best woman in the room, and that I've captured his attention and can keep it. Otherwise, I might try to see what my other options are, too. I wouldn't trust a guy who can't keep his eyes under control. Perhaps, he can't keep his penis under control either.... And if I feel like that, I can't be my wild uninhibited self with him in bed, so he better go call up the waitress....ha ha...
vsmini Posted July 8, 2011 Posted July 8, 2011 It's a question of respect. He should respect the ideal of making me feel like I am the best woman in the room, and that I've captured his attention and can keep it. Otherwise, I might try to see what my other options are, too. I sort of agree with this but it's also your job to keep your own insecurity in check. A glance can be natural. I'm no cheerleader for gawking or having my guy check out other girls in front of me....and I agree with how absurd it seems for a girl who hates her guy checking other girls out to actually comment about how hot, said girl actually is. Maybe I misunderstood what you're saying. I'm a strong advocate of the girl being responsible for feeling secure in her own right and just because a guy checks another girl out - that's no reason to crumble.
grkBoy Posted July 8, 2011 Posted July 8, 2011 I check out women in front of my girlfriend...and point out said women. Usually though, it's "Wow...check out the top on that girl. You could so rock that!" I even approached a girl once with my GF and asked her where she got some item of clothing. My GF doesn't mind, because she knows fully well that I'd rather come home to her than chase other females. She even sees I have a bunch of female friends, but also knows I will praise my GF to them. Although my GF wonders why any of them never snatched me up...she's quite thankful for their mistake. I even talk to female friends about modeling for me (I shoot photography). I guess it's about trust. It's one thing if I was heading out with other women and even getting into "sticky situations" with them...but another when I treat it only like friendship. My GF doesn't want to put me in a situation where I feel "jailed", and I show her simply that I want no one else. If a man or a woman is so insecure that he/she thinks their mate will cheat on them in a heartbeat...then chances are they never really "had" their mate, and they're only biding time before the insecure person makes a dumb mistake and gets dumped.
vsmini Posted July 8, 2011 Posted July 8, 2011 I check out women in front of my girlfriend...and point out said women. Usually though, it's "Wow...check out the top on that girl. You could so rock that!" I even approached a girl once with my GF and asked her where she got some item of clothing. My GF doesn't mind, because she knows fully well that I'd rather come home to her than chase other females. She even sees I have a bunch of female friends, but also knows I will praise my GF to them. Although my GF wonders why any of them never snatched me up...she's quite thankful for their mistake. I even talk to female friends about modeling for me (I shoot photography). I guess it's about trust. It's one thing if I was heading out with other women and even getting into "sticky situations" with them...but another when I treat it only like friendship. My GF doesn't want to put me in a situation where I feel "jailed", and I show her simply that I want no one else. If a man or a woman is so insecure that he/she thinks their mate will cheat on them in a heartbeat...then chances are they never really "had" their mate, and they're only biding time before the insecure person makes a dumb mistake and gets dumped. Well it's a fine line. I'm sure your girlfriend does have a very healthy amount of self-resepect and self-esteem but you also do a good job of making it known that you love her, don't hide her and praise her regularly. It sounds like you guys are in an openly mutually fulfilling relationship which would (and should) give any girl the feeling of true security. Good for you guys. Though I'm sure even secure girls would give the side eye to a guy that does what you do IF, and only if, he never mentioned the GF, flirted a bit and never really made that GF feel like a priority. Not saying it's your job to make her feel secure but I'm sure all that you're doing in the relationship is helping things run much more smoothly. Does that make logic?
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