Ally-65 Posted July 7, 2011 Posted July 7, 2011 I guess I know the answer to this one..... but just checking. Ex has a birthday on Saturday. Do I send a text? No, I guess not but feel kind of sorry that I wont. He will definately be expecting one!! Ha bloody Ha!!
vsmini Posted July 7, 2011 Posted July 7, 2011 No - the Birthday's sole purpose nowadays is to give us an excuse to resume contact with our ex's. STAY AWAY
Author Ally-65 Posted July 7, 2011 Author Posted July 7, 2011 How long have you been broken up? A month! After a 2 year relationship. I think I do just keep quiet. I'm doing real well with NC and feeling more positive lately. I can't risk taking any steps back!!
lonelynyc Posted July 7, 2011 Posted July 7, 2011 I just got out of a 2 year relationship too (a few days ago). And I thought a month was lengthy enough to be on the NC path, especially if something like a birthday popped up.... I guess not. I have a lot to learn. This is going to be so freaking painful.
Author Ally-65 Posted July 7, 2011 Author Posted July 7, 2011 I just got out of a 2 year relationship too (a few days ago). And I thought a month was lengthy enough to be on the NC path, especially if something like a birthday popped up.... I guess not. I have a lot to learn. This is going to be so freaking painful. But it really does get better after a month. I have really been focussing on as much of the negative sides to him and the relationship as possible. Even written lists of plus and minus and keep them with me. Hugs to you.
sleepykitten Posted July 7, 2011 Posted July 7, 2011 Me too-have been broken up now for 6 weeks, i broke NC after i intiated it after a mere week, we saw each other but it did help as i was feeling stronger and wanted him to see me that way not the way i last was which was a tearful needy wreck....anyway....back to NC, and he too has a b/day coming up and I wont be texting, sending card etc he definatly will be expecting one and i cant wait not to do it!! Things have got so much better the first few weeks i was a mess, lost weight, crying etc but now, i can see all his faults and feel positive and happy sometimes, i have been focusing on me and doing lots of meditation,self help stuff, gratitude list-this really helped. I also did list of pus and minus, the plus list only had 3 things on!!!
69ways Posted July 7, 2011 Posted July 7, 2011 i travelled across europe to give her flowers on her bd, it was heartbreaking, stay away
sd89 Posted July 7, 2011 Posted July 7, 2011 I also have a birthday coming up, but have been making progress with my ex. As in, we talk normally, when SHE calls me and we have only met twice since the breakup. I also see us getting back together. Would it be wrong to avoid her birthday?
69ways Posted July 7, 2011 Posted July 7, 2011 I believe in your case no as you are finding that response you should but dont be over-charming, if you know what I mean. A nice text would do the trick or maybe a bd card I went the whole 9 yards and blew back in my face even if after 2 days she wanted me back. The bottom line is that every situation is different.
radiodarcy Posted July 7, 2011 Posted July 7, 2011 i would say don't do it. i have no plans to contact the ex when his birthday rolls around on the 25th. not acknowledging his birthday may seem mean, but after having broken NC when he contacted me back in february (ironically it was the day before my birthday and no he did not say "happy birthday" the next day - -in fact he never acknowledged it at all ) i now realize that even the most innocuous contact with him is enough to set me back. besides, why would i bother to break 4 months of NC to wish him a happy birthday when a.) he couldn't be bothered to so much as acknowledge mine this year - - or the year prior and b.) will be too busy celebrating with his new girlfriend?
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