adagio012 Posted July 6, 2011 Posted July 6, 2011 (edited) I dated a guy for 7 months and we broke up 2 months ago and I'm still hurting from the separation. Yes, I know he wasn't good for me (I won't go into details, but all I'm going to say is he's the type of guy who loves the attention from other women), but I'm having difficulty getting over him. It's hard telling him my concerns because he gets defensive every time I try to bring up some concerns I have about him, since successful relationships are built upon good communication, right? Anyways the next day after the night where we had a huge argument 'cause he was always too busy texting people whenever we go out (caught him sending flirty sms messages with some girl from work and some message content suggests giving her a goodnight kiss and asking her for hugs. I felt so betrayed!), he told me he wants to meet other people and decided to break things off. I didn't want to break up, but since he wanted to and i was hurt, I let him go and rejected his offer of being friends and decided to cut him out from my life and did not contact him in any form. I think he was hurt that I refused to be friends but how could I be friends with somebody who wasn't considerate of me and made me felt I was cheated on? There's one problem. We work together at the same company (bad idea to be dating someone in the same company, I know) and see each other around 3 times a week, 'cause we work in different departments. I would avoid him or ignore his presence whenever he comes by into my department and sometimes I would catch him looking at me. Sometimes whenever we pass by each other, there's this kind of expression on his face -- don't know whether it's fear or something else-- whenever he sees me, and sometimes I would just give him a smile (although I really hate him on the inside) and continue doing what I was doing. I'm not really sure if he is doing anything with that woman whom I caught him messaging that night... not that I want to care, but I absolutely dread seeing her and whenever I see her I try to smile. The NC was broken only once when he messaged me out of the blue within 3 weeks of our separation when he asked how I was doing and whether I was alright. I was being brief and vague with him and didn't talk too long. Although I hate his guts and don't want to think of him, he's always on my mind everyday and it's killing me. Even if we can't be together, some part of me wishes he could just sincerely apologize to me. Anyways, I've been contemplating whether I should stay with my current company and live with with all these negative feelings of dread associated with work because of my ex and seeing that woman around, or resigning my job by the end of summer and applying for a better and promising position from another company before I leave. Any advice? If I stay, I feel that I won't be able to heal although I had been sticking with NC and not talking with him. If I go, would it pain him even further that he will lose me forever and will not be able to see me working at our company? Also, anybody who went through something similar as me, being in my perspective want to share what happened and what I can do? Thanks in advance. Edited July 6, 2011 by adagio012
Author adagio012 Posted July 6, 2011 Author Posted July 6, 2011 anyone? pleasee? I sometimes have the urge to text him and tell him i missed him so much, but it will be counterproductive to my healing and I have no idea how he'll respond to it... and I don't want to look weak. (Funny how everyone -- whether dumper or dumpee-- don't want their ego shattered.) I heard from a couple of people (not many people knew about us) that he's not really taking it very well because of my non-contact with him.
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