ciembi Posted July 4, 2011 Posted July 4, 2011 Hello to the forum, this is my first post. I hope I get it right. I had a 3.5-month long-distance relationship that was pretty intense with a guy who broke it off 3 months ago out of the blue, saying he didn't feel the same anymore, had other stuff on his head, that he wasn't sure whether his lack of interest might be temporary or not, and in any case he didn't want to "lose" our relationship (meaning, let's be friends, I suppose). I was heartbroken and couldn't handle being just "friends", so after a couple of tries I just went plain No Contact. This lasted for 2 months, until a month ago he IMs me to tell me he had unfriended me from FB and that he regretted doing so. I accepted him back, thinking that would be it, but since then he has contacted me daily (now we're up to several times a day) on MSN during working hours, sent an occasional text message to my cellphone, and a couple of weeks ago he caught me on MSN at home and requested a videocall. I accepted, thinking he would tell me, sort of face to face (since we're LD), what he was about. But he just said a couple immaterial things and then gave me (what I thought then to be) significant looks, but before I could even gather my nerve to ask him, said "Now I've seen you. I should get back to work". All our conversations are about general things - never about feelings or "miss you" or anything like that, although he's gradually begun to introduce things from our time together, things I didn't even think he would remember, he asks about my family members, etc. Fast forward to the past week, where he asks me what he should do with his business, which has not performed well for the past year. I suggested he close it (he used to ask me the same question repeatedly when we were together, but I always responded diplomatically because I didn't want to shock him with my real opinion - this time I answered my honest opinion). I never thought he would go and set everything in motion to actually DO IT. He's now in the process, he tells me about every step (always on MSN - that's how all the contact has gone between us so far). What do you think he is doing here? I thought about asking him directly, but the latest developments (his going out of business) have made me hold back. I believe he hasn't got the mental space to define things with me right now. But was he setting anything in motion before that? Is it just his idea of friendship? I could use the forum's objective views on this. I will appreciate any help. Thank you in advance!
wilsonx Posted July 4, 2011 Posted July 4, 2011 Hello to the forum, this is my first post. I hope I get it right. I had a 3.5-month long-distance relationship that was pretty intense with a guy who broke it off 3 months ago out of the blue, saying he didn't feel the same anymore, had other stuff on his head, that he wasn't sure whether his lack of interest might be temporary or not, and in any case he didn't want to "lose" our relationship (meaning, let's be friends, I suppose). I was heartbroken and couldn't handle being just "friends", so after a couple of tries I just went plain No Contact. This lasted for 2 months, until a month ago he IMs me to tell me he had unfriended me from FB and that he regretted doing so. I accepted him back, thinking that would be it, but since then he has contacted me daily (now we're up to several times a day) on MSN during working hours, sent an occasional text message to my cellphone, and a couple of weeks ago he caught me on MSN at home and requested a videocall. I accepted, thinking he would tell me, sort of face to face (since we're LD), what he was about. But he just said a couple immaterial things and then gave me (what I thought then to be) significant looks, but before I could even gather my nerve to ask him, said "Now I've seen you. I should get back to work". All our conversations are about general things - never about feelings or "miss you" or anything like that, although he's gradually begun to introduce things from our time together, things I didn't even think he would remember, he asks about my family members, etc. Fast forward to the past week, where he asks me what he should do with his business, which has not performed well for the past year. I suggested he close it (he used to ask me the same question repeatedly when we were together, but I always responded diplomatically because I didn't want to shock him with my real opinion - this time I answered my honest opinion). I never thought he would go and set everything in motion to actually DO IT. He's now in the process, he tells me about every step (always on MSN - that's how all the contact has gone between us so far). What do you think he is doing here? I thought about asking him directly, but the latest developments (his going out of business) have made me hold back. I believe he hasn't got the mental space to define things with me right now. But was he setting anything in motion before that? Is it just his idea of friendship? I could use the forum's objective views on this. I will appreciate any help. Thank you in advance! He's just being a friend and thats all... nothing more... if you can't see this, I think you should exit from his life and block him from facebook and IMs
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