davidguetta Posted July 1, 2011 Posted July 1, 2011 So I was with a girl for 6 months, it was my first real relationship in a long time. and i guess as it goes, everything was just perfect. we never fought, we loved spending time together, everyone was talking about how good we looked together. things happened, and for no real reason, we started to fall apart. my way of dealing with people who are upset or angry is by shutting down. and i'm also not the most vocal about my feelings. she was the exact opposite, and when she would get upset, i would mostly just stay quiet. expecting her to cool down. she started having doubts about our relationship, and i could tell because she started getting sharp with me, and losing respect for me. i could see it happening, but i didn't really understand why, at the time. and just shut myself away from her even more. until one day she said she wasn't happy. that there was something missing. i agreed because at that point, i was tired and i really didn't know what else to say, my ego and self esteem had already taken a beating and i thought that i might atleast be a man about things. once things settled in, i saw that she was moving on with her life and i panicked. i started texting her and calling her all the time, wanting to tell her how i felt and how important she was. and obviously, i pushed her away further. i even sent the "letter" telling her all of my mistakes and how amazing she was and how important she was to me. and after i got the expected polite reply. i told her i couldnt talk to her anymore because i needed to get my head straight. she agreed. telling me to talk to her when i felt better. not too much time has passed by, but the initial reason i started nc (to cheat her into missing me), is not the reason i'm doing it anymore. i believe that i still love her, but i also accept the fact that being in a relationship involves two people, both of who need to be happy. i looked back at the last month we were together, she wasn't happy being with me. and as a result, neither was i. but i was so blinded by the good times we shared that i forgot about that. we didn't work out our problems because neither of us was willing to make a compromise. doing nc and fooling someone into taking you back will only last for a short while before things end up the same way. unless you're willing to actually talk and understand each other. a relationship may start based on love, but really, what makes it stand is compromise, trust and commitment. i just wish i had learnt this while i was still with her.
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