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When did this become a red flag?


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Posted

"You're my only one."

 

When exactly did this gain an insulting connotation? I guess I should cringe the next time my SO calls me his one and only. :confused:

 

Discuss.

Posted

That's odd. Did someone tell you this was a red flag? IMO, it's not a flag.

Posted
"You're my only one."

 

When exactly did this gain an insulting connotation? I guess I should cringe the next time my SO calls me his one and only. :confused:

 

Discuss.

 

It depends on the context and who says it. When you emphasize the word ONLY and it is said by someone you're not exclusive with, this is not a good sign. If your BF says it, totally different context and meaning.

 

Being with someone because you're their only option is not a compliment. Being with someone who decided to make you their only option is different.

Posted

Thanks. Reading the comment in context, now makes more sense. I can see her perception and it's possible it has validity. But I just don't happen to agree.

Posted (edited)
"You're my only one."

 

When exactly did this gain an insulting connotation? I guess I should cringe the next time my SO calls me his one and only. :confused:

 

Discuss.

 

Haha taken from my thread indeed

Edited by conehead
Posted

It depends on what the person meant. I think the poster meant it was a red flag in the sense that when the guy said it he meant she was his only one because he had no other options and thus was settling for her. I'm almost positive that's not what he meant when he said it, but I have been wrong before.

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Posted
Thanks. Reading the comment in context, now makes more sense. I can see her perception and it's possible it has validity. But I just don't happen to agree.

 

I don't agree either. I can't imagine someone saying that and really meaning that they have no other options. It's commonly known as something sweet and romantic that you say to someone you're dating.

Posted

Personally, I'd feel more warm & fuzzy being told that I was their "only one" than their "number one," which implies that there are others - but I'm the favorite.

  • Author
Posted
Personally, I'd feel more warm & fuzzy being told that I was their "only one" than their "number one," which implies that there are others - but I'm the favorite.

 

Again, agreed. I feel like being told I'm number one would be more conditional, in a sense--like "Hey, if you do something I don't like then someone else is #1, but as long as you're cool, you'll stay there." Whereas being someone's only one, to me, means that they don't want to bother with anyone else because they are so enamored with me.

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