harual21 Posted June 29, 2011 Posted June 29, 2011 My boyfriend broke up with me a few weeks ago. It came out of the blue – we had an argument, he asked for space, I reacted like a typical female and pushed, he eventually broke up with me saying he needs time to sort himself out. He took me out to dinner a few days after the break up so we could “talk”, he told me he needs a break and would like to see me again after I get back from a girls holiday in Europe at the end of August. He told me he needs to be alone to get his life together and this is not about seeing other people, however, we are single at this point. I’ve seen his facebook account and by the looks of things he is chasing hook-ups. It was implied to me, very heavily, by a 3rd party that something had happened during our relationship between him and her… I questioned him last week (Monday) and he denied it and then became frantic that I was leaving his life forever. He text me Thursday saying a simple “I miss you”. A very drunk me bumped into a very drunk him in the early hours of Sunday morning in a nightclub, he was standing right next to me but ran away when I tried talking to him – we exchanged heated words. I text him Sunday questioning his actions and he said he was just freaked out seeing me. I asked him to tell me to stop loving him and leave him alone and that is exactly what I will do – I then said “is this just a break or are you over it? I am beyond confused”. His response was “it’s a break”. I have left him alone since. I love this guy, really. I’ve done a lot of googling lately trying to get my head around things and everything in regards to being on “break” is sounding negative. This “break” or “break up” has been happening now for about a month and I am hoping it would be easier for him to have just told me to leave him alone if that’s really what he wants. My head is a mess and it is absolutely horrible . Does it sound like this is just a break? Am I being completely naïve?
Exit Posted June 29, 2011 Posted June 29, 2011 Pretty unfair to you. This basically allows him to breakup with you, but he gets the chance to see you again at the end of summer and see if he changed his mind, or if he still feels the same, it won't be any problem for him to just say "yeah sorry, we're done". It's up to you if you even want to leave that door open to see him in August. He claims this isn't about seeing other people but it would seem that he is at least looking for physical companions. Worry about August when it arrives, but for right now, just disappear, don't chase, don't beg, let him see that you don't need him, even if it is the hardest thing in the world for you to do.
PegNosePete Posted June 29, 2011 Posted June 29, 2011 He told me he needs to be alone to get his life together and this is not about seeing other people, however, we are single at this point. What a load of balls. Why does he need to be single if he doesn't want to see other people? It's the typical excuse of someone who wants to go around acting like a single person, which by the sounds of it, is exactly what he is doing. So he wants to go and spread his wild oats and then come back to you after a few months, and you'll be waiting with open arms. Are you OK with that? It could also be a reaction to your girls holiday in Europe. If he thinks that you're going to be off with single girls doing single girl things (ie. chasing guys) then he might be giving you a free pass since he wants a free pass himself too. But I think it's more about him than you. in a nightclub, he was standing right next to me but ran away when I tried talking to him – we exchanged heated words. WTF!!! He was obviously up to something that he didn't want you to see. Three guesses what that could have been. I would have fun in Europe and when you get back, find someone better than this loser, who will respect you.
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