EgoJoe Posted June 26, 2011 Posted June 26, 2011 It sucks so bad. I can't even articulate it well. I feel dumb for ever being hopeful or positive after we talked on the 7th. Right now. I'm so glad it is unlikely she'll be calling anytime soon; if ever. I really wouldn't answer. If she emailed I wouldn't read it. I'm not kidding myself. Yeah I was pushy but the worst I got was one hopeful message and then asking how long she didn't want to hear from me. Passive aggressive contemptuous response = me realizing all of my gut instincts were correct and all of the little things I did to test for a response that I didn't want were for naught. I knew all along and didn't want to believe. I'm glad I sent her that message saying I didn't want her back. I'm glad she's so far away. Ugh. Love is blind.
Movingthrough Posted June 26, 2011 Posted June 26, 2011 I'm so glad it is unlikely she'll be calling anytime soon; if ever. I really wouldn't answer. If she emailed I wouldn't read it. This is the only beauty of anger stage. You really start to see that its not worth it. I still find myself getting mad little by little but i also find myself not caring at all, because if you are mad at someone then you shouldnt be with them. I would say that you are close to being completely done with it, once you start seeing the light and knowing you dont want to talk to them, it gets a lot better.
dicky_fish Posted June 26, 2011 Posted June 26, 2011 I think the anger stage is the worst of the lot of them. I keep coming in and out of it and all it does is leave me with a pit of rage in my stomach, then confuse the hell out of me because it really makes me question whether I ever really cared about my girlfriend, and even worse is it usually opens up the darker parts of your mind. I've been thinking some horribe, if not down right evil things that I could do to her to get back at her for what she's done to me, and it scares the hell out of me.
Author EgoJoe Posted June 26, 2011 Author Posted June 26, 2011 I'm just glad that the most I got was hopeful. I never cried on the phone I was truly honest about something that made me insecure. When she was saying it was "over" 'cus we "think different, i don't get her" etc. etc. but not saying if she ever wanted to see me again at all 'cus she's "broken" that the worst I got was exasperated. I'm glad that when I asked for a clear boundary etc. when she did something passive agressive I called her out on it. I'm greatful to Homebrew for telling me not to apologize even though I wanted to end on good terms. She became SO immature.
ShatteredDreams Posted June 26, 2011 Posted June 26, 2011 It's been month 4 of the break up, and I still keep coming into this stage. Even though the relationship was according to my psychologist "mutually abusive," I really did love her and believed her when she said she would never leave me for anyone. But she put me through hell, just to be with my close friend. At times I want revenge so bad, and my mind keeps going into very dark places. I tried very hard to keep her happy, give her everything she has because her family never would. What hurts the most is her saying she is a virgin to my friend, as if all the things I did for her never meant a thing.
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