vsmini Posted June 23, 2011 Posted June 23, 2011 I personally don't believe it. I also thinks it gets people in a lot of trouble. Meaning, they ignore a lot of crap behavior because the story of "love at first sight" just sounds so lovely. I also know about 50% of the people who claimed love and first sight ended up having horrible break ups - but that could be just chance and the way relationships work out and I understand that. I just want to hear someone's perspective on how or why you really believe in it. I consider love at first sight to be - quite literally "at first sight" or anything under 1 hour of conversation with them. So what's your case for love at first sight?
oaks Posted June 23, 2011 Posted June 23, 2011 I believe that love at first sight can happen, but I don't believe that when it does happen that it's a guarantee of a good long term stable relationship. I believe it's happened to me on more than one occasion, but only one resulted in a relationship (the others were with people who weren't available) and that relationship lasted many years. I don't go out looking for or expecting to find love at first sight with my current dating and I won't discount potential partners simply because it isn't there because I don't think it's essential for me to find it in order to have a loving stable relationship. Not sure if I answered the question.
Eve Posted June 23, 2011 Posted June 23, 2011 Only happened once. I fell for my Hubby from the moment I heard his voice. Same with him with me. Strangely, I knew exactly what he looked like too even though it was a telephone conversation. He asked me to marry him within two weeks and we had not yet met in person. At the time, I did really consider that I could possibly be going crazy and so stayed away from him!!! Although we spoke everyday, exchanged photos and silly letters etc, I did not agree to meeting him for three months. Dunno if this is rare or common if the whole history of people are taken into consideration.. but it happened with us. I found it a bit scary to be honest. I would say that this is risky stuff for some who have a lot of issues... and I have heard mainly of similar stories ending very badly. I did read a story similar to mine very recently though and knew exactly what the writer was describing. Take care, Eve x
tigressA Posted June 23, 2011 Posted June 23, 2011 (edited) Only happened once. I fell for my Hubby from the moment I heard his voice. Same with him with me. Strangely, I knew exactly what he looked like too even though it was a telephone conversation. He asked me to marry him within two weeks and we had not yet met in person. At the time, I did really consider that I could possibly be going crazy and so stayed away from him!!! Although we spoke everyday, exchanged photos and silly letters etc, I did not agree to meeting him for three months. Dunno if this is rare or common if the whole history of people are taken into consideration.. but it happened with us. I found it a bit scary to be honest. I would say that this is risky stuff for some who have a lot of issues... and I have heard mainly of similar stories ending very badly. I did read a story similar to mine very recently though and knew exactly what the writer was describing. Take care, Eve x So romantic Sigh... It happened once for me...online. I came across a guy's profile and I was instantly like "WHOA". Tingles all over. Quite literally at first sight. We had ridiculous chemistry right off the bat, but he was in a player phase (he was dating one of his coworkers as well) so I ended things with him after 2 dates because I knew I would get my heart broken if I didn't. It didn't happen with my current BF (though I do adore him more than any other living ), but he says it happened for him when he saw me. To sum up, I believe in it, but it is definitely not necessary for a successful relationship. It should be low on the list, or not even on the list. Edited June 23, 2011 by tigressA
Author vsmini Posted June 23, 2011 Author Posted June 23, 2011 Oh man - now we're talking love at first sight VIA online profiles? HAHA this has to be the future!
Eve Posted June 23, 2011 Posted June 23, 2011 Oh man - now we're talking love at first sight VIA online profiles? HAHA this has to be the future! Thanks Tigress.. and thanks for sharing.. LOL, I think I felt things so astutely because I have a history of missing key signals being given. Most of the time I just think people are being nice and don't even consider if they fancy me, unless they say it outright. I found this even more difficult to gauge within the dating club scenario. Hubby is the same so we would probably have missed the opportunity without all the fireworks that went off initially. At the time I had just about got used to being single and he was looking for a friend. I liked his profile because it didn't have any expectations and was very short and really funny.. but I can still now remember how I felt the very second that I heard his voice... man! We have never stopped talking since.. Take care, Eve x
daphne Posted June 24, 2011 Posted June 24, 2011 No, I don't really believe in it. I believe in lust at first sight. I've experienced that before. And it usually ends up in flames. I think believing in fairy tale ideas about love can make us think that the headiness of sexual chemistry is a great substitute for the real thing. I think real love takes time. It seems to last longer too.
zlatnapolja Posted June 24, 2011 Posted June 24, 2011 I personally don't believe it. I also thinks it gets people in a lot of trouble. Meaning, they ignore a lot of crap behavior because the story of "love at first sight" just sounds so lovely. I also know about 50% of the people who claimed love and first sight ended up having horrible break ups - but that could be just chance and the way relationships work out and I understand that. I just want to hear someone's perspective on how or why you really believe in it. I consider love at first sight to be - quite literally "at first sight" or anything under 1 hour of conversation with them. So what's your case for love at first sight? When I met my BF, I was still dating my ex. The relationship with my ex was dead already for multiple reasons and I already told him that I wanted to give it a last shot, but that I didnt think it would work anymore because he had hurt me too much. So then I met my BF and the first thing that I thought was 'oh ohhh', because there was such a big attraction right away and I knew I would fall in love with him. I don't know about LOVE at first sight, I do think that there can be an extremly big attraction and an intuitive feeling that it will end up in a great love.
zlatnapolja Posted June 24, 2011 Posted June 24, 2011 When I met my BF, I was still dating my ex. The relationship with my ex was dead already for multiple reasons and I already told him that I wanted to give it a last shot, but that I didnt think it would work anymore because he had hurt me too much. So then I met my BF and the first thing that I thought was 'oh ohhh', because there was such a big attraction right away and I knew I would fall in love with him. I don't know about LOVE at first sight, I do think that there can be an extremly big attraction and an intuitive feeling that it will end up in a great love. I want to add, that I didnt give in to this feeling right away (of course), but after 3 months I broke up with my ex bf and my current BF and I got together.
D-Lish Posted June 24, 2011 Posted June 24, 2011 That happened to me with my recent ex. I was head over heels the moment I saw him. Alas, our relationship started out like a firecracker and ended in disaster and heartbreak for me.
TheLawmaker Posted June 24, 2011 Posted June 24, 2011 I don't believe in love at first sight. If it was real, the crushes I have had would have loved me back. They didn't, so it doesn't exist.
Woggle Posted June 24, 2011 Posted June 24, 2011 I believe in lust at first sight but real love takes time to build.
Confusedalways Posted June 24, 2011 Posted June 24, 2011 Consider me in the camp of love at first sight believer Truthfully I think it's hard to believe in it online until you experience it yourself. Though my current boyfriend and I did not meet online, I've been down that road before....
mogul Posted June 24, 2011 Posted June 24, 2011 I believe in love at first sight to an extent. Maybe I'm just a hopeless romantic. Rarely do I see a girl that makes me go "wow". Wow and hot to me are completely different. Hot is more lust and common. When I see a girl that is "wow", she embodies confidence, beauty, and just a certain demeanor about her that makes me want to get to know her. Crazy how I come to that conclusion after a quick glance but true. When I see a girl that has that "wow" factor, she is usually a good mix of cute and hot and has the look that I'm going for and has it together. Rare, last time I had one of these moments I turned her in to a serious relationship.
Stockalone Posted June 24, 2011 Posted June 24, 2011 (edited) I don't know about LOVE at first sight, I do think that there can be an extremly big attraction and an intuitive feeling that it will end up in a great love. I agree with this. That said, there is obviously no guarantee that the other person feels the same way or that it'll last forever. So what's your case for love at first sight? I am a believer. Edited June 24, 2011 by Stockalone
Eternal Sunshine Posted June 24, 2011 Posted June 24, 2011 I do believe in it, although it didn't happen like that with my current boyfriend.
welikeincrowds Posted June 24, 2011 Posted June 24, 2011 Whatever the hell it is, it's pretty amazing that this is something we are capable of, isn't it? There is this one girl that I see around the city sometimes. Imagine that -- in a city of 8 million people, there's a perfect stranger I "see around". She is astoundingly beautiful. Yet there's a lot of "beautiful" people here, some even astoundingly so, and you expect it, like you'd expect to see flowers in a garden. It's not just that she has a symmetrical face -- there's something about her. At least, to me. Incidentally, not every time I see her, is it by her face. I have come across her from behind on more than one occasion (???) and have noticed what she's wearing, or her hair, which is never in the same style, and she has defined for me what shampoo commercials refer to as "shine and bounce". I swell up and think "Wow, now that girl, she glides, she is special" -- and as an independent thought, each time. Then she turns the corner and I see her face, and holy lol what do you know, it's actually that girl, that ****ing girl. More than once this has happened. It's pretty eerie, actually. Like maybe this is evidence of me being programmed by like a government hypnotist, and the next time I see her I'm going to go into some kind of trance and rob a bank or something. Wait, right? This is what we're talking about, everyone's had this **** before, right?
gatzbycap Posted June 24, 2011 Posted June 24, 2011 I definitely believe in this. It happened to me, and the girl I fell in love with was oddly nice. No crappy bahavior in any way. Turns out that she didn't feel the same way, but it happens. At the time, I was more upset over her, but that was 2 years ago. We're still friends, and I still love her unconditionally, and I remember the moment I saw her. Every detail. I don't have a photographic memory, but I can remember that extremely short amount of time in vivid detail. I'm pretty sure I could even draw it out. That's why I believe in it.
Nexus One Posted June 24, 2011 Posted June 24, 2011 I always first have to know some things about a woman before I'm able to crush on her, so love at first sight is not something I believe in personally. Immediate physical attraction is possible, but love? I don't think so, not even for guys, because otherwise we would be crushing on women we see on billboards on the sides of roads, yet we do not.
Eternal Sunshine Posted June 24, 2011 Posted June 24, 2011 I basically believe that you can be strongly physically attracted to someone at first sight. Then, as you get to know them - you can find out that you have tons in common and it gets deeper. In retrospect - people call it "love at first sight". BUT it is even more likely to find out that you have nothing in common and it all crushes and burns. In retrospect - people call it infatuation.
EasyHeart Posted June 24, 2011 Posted June 24, 2011 I think ES summed it up nicely. The notion of 'love at first sight' is just a symptom of a more general problem: watering down the meaning of 'love'. You can't love someone that you don't know, and getting to know someone takes time. So if you put any real meaning to the word 'love' besides lust or attraction, then you can't possibly love someone at first sight. "Love" at first sight isn't love; it's just hormones.
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