Denial in "Betrayed Spouses"

[RepairMinded]

Even funnier is when some people who claim to have you on "ignore" insist on posting in response to your thread--you know, responses to posts they supposedly haven't even read.

[John Michael Kane]

Wow, like this wasn't going to turn into a trainwreck right from the word GO. All aboard. Thank heavens his posts don't appear to me due to the magic of an ignore list.

 

Yikes.

 

For someone who's "ignoring" me, they certainly can't resist taking a peek at what I post.

[reboot]

Even funnier is when some people who claim to have you on "ignore" insist on posting in response to your thread--you know, responses to posts they supposedly haven't even read.

 

You still see them when people quote them.

[John Michael Kane]

Even funnier is when some people who claim to have you on "ignore" insist on posting in response to your thread--you know, responses to posts they supposedly haven't even read.

 

Exactly! Too silly!

[RepairMinded]

You're right. But how foolish would it be for me to try to tell someone about divorce when I've never been through that process?

 

How foolish is it for you to give reconciliation advice to BSs and WSs where the affair involved serious sexual infidelity, when you have never been through that process?

 

 

That would be like you trying to walk someone through marital reconciliation.

 

It would be like someone who has never experienced sexual infidelity nor had to recover from it trying to walk someone through marital reconciliation from sexual infidelity.

 

 

I participate in the reconciliation threads, I participate in threads where the goal hasn't been decided, and I will leave the threads where divorce is decided for people with experience in such matters to post in.

 

If your wife had committed sexual infidelity on you even one time, you would have divorced her, no questions asked. At least according to my understanding of some of your previous posts. I didn't see you telling kidd (for a recent example) to divorce his wife because of her sexual infidelity.

 

You're deliberately encouraging victims of serious sexual infidelity to remain married even though you would not have tolerated the same in your own relationship. If you would not have tolerated that misery in your own life, what is the justification for repeatedly counseling others to do so?

 

Have you considered that you might take a simlar tack? If you see that they've decided to reconcile...realize it's outside of your knowledge base and leave those threads for those that have done so? Participate in the ones where they've either chosen to divorce or are still trying to decide?

 

Why don't you apply YOUR standard to YOURself, and stop posting in threads which involve sexual infidelity, before you ask others to apply your standards to themselves?

[RepairMinded]

You still see them when people quote them.

 

This is JMK's thread. He started the discussion. What is the point of putting him on ignore, yet reading his thread anyway, but only to read responses to his posts, and actually then responding to the responses?

 

It's trolling pure and simple, and you know it. If you don't like JMK or his opinion then it's simple: don't participate in his thread.

 

It certainly makes no sense to jump into the thread for the sole purpose of insulting him, without even bothering to read his posts. On the other hand if there's something that he actually posted that you take issue with, feel free to blast away.

[silktricks]

Ahh here we go. Just what I've been waiting for.

 

See folks? She basically said she never called me bitter, even though she just called me bitter.LOL

No. I didn't call you bitter. I said it appeared that you haven't moved on. But maybe you have moved on. Maybe this is just you.

 

There are no "pluses" in reconciliation. Only sloppy seconds and future pain that pushes folks to the brink of insanity.

Of course there are pluses. The fact that you cannot see them doesn't mean they don't exist.

 

 

Then why call me bitter? Evidently I'm not, since I have eliminated the threat that was behind my back. So in conclusion, it must be those who choose to stay in miserable relationships.

I didn't call you bitter. You choose to repeatedly claim I say things I do not.

 

 

 

Oh no don't back out. You specifically stated I was bitter, which is untrue.

I specifically did NOT state you were bitter.

 

 

 

But on a technical note I don't understand what you're stating about me leaving "stuff" behind. I didn't leave anything behind so you're still implying I'm somehow bitter because I chose to divorce her.

:lmao: Is English your first language? I ask because you don't seem to understand it.

 

 

 

This is exactly what I'm talking about. You don't honestly know if your husband will not cheat again, since it's evident that he cheated before, which shows most likely he'll cheat again.

Actually I honestly do know that he will not cheat again.

 

Complete denial at it's highest.

 

Both cheated. Just because one shows remorse doesn't mean he won't cheat again.

There was a lot more than mere remorse involved, but I wouldn't choose to air it here, and certainly not with you.

 

 

 

And see you've convinced yourself that somehow you're at fault for his cheating. You may not have dealt with the problems before, but you didn't go off and cheat when times were hard. He did, and it looks like he's trying to use that as an excuse to cheat on you, and you're accepting it.

:lmao: :lmao: :lmao: uhhh, no. I was in no way at fault for his cheating. He cheated. He owned it. What I said is that our marriage is now much more satisfying for both of us.

 

Denial.

Yes, you are in denial. I feel sorry for you. But I won't play anymore.