Lilmisus Posted June 23, 2011 Posted June 23, 2011 Last Thursday I met Mr. Cute Guy, and since Sunday, it's been agreed that we'd meet up for lunch tomorrow. Though I complained and over-analyzed his interest in me, and why he was texting me so much so soon, now I can't help but over-analyze is seemingly lack of interest and texting me. After Sunday, the texts pretty much stopped after he asked me not to bail on him tomorrow, and after I told him I was on my way to work. He sent the last message, and I took it as a sign that he was leaving it open for me to text him next, which I did the next day. We sent a couple messages that day, but he didn't reply to the last one I sent (asking how the beach had been). Since then, I hadn't heard from him till today, after I texted him a simple "hey!" I asked if he still wanted to do lunch tomorrow, and he told me yeah, as long as I was still up for it, to which I said sure. So, he suggested Mexican, and I said that it was fine. Didn't answer the question of when and where though... I just don't know if I really want to go out with him tomorrow. I don't know if it's because of the lack of texts and contact, how I'm unsure of his motives still, or because I'm just not ready to date again yet, though I thought (think) for sure I was. I mean..what does it mean that his consistent texts (including good morning ones) just stopped? That he found my thread on here the other day and decided to slow things down? Part of me wonders if my friend's boyfriend told him things about me that turned him off...which is very possible. Is this just nerves and over-thinking that's killing my enthusiasm that I had for tomorrow, or what? I know I already promised to not bail on him, so what's someway to get my mood back up about tomorrow and to just chill about things?
Imajerk17 Posted June 23, 2011 Posted June 23, 2011 I love reading the women's threads on here, because they give a lot of insight. It's still interesting to me how the women on here will read way too much into something small (such as his texting less) and make way too big a deal about it, and ignore huge red flags. Maybe he is texting less because he has a life and he will see you tomorrow? Go to lunch with him tomorrow. You will find out more about him in one hour than you will in 100 loveshack posts.
Author Lilmisus Posted June 23, 2011 Author Posted June 23, 2011 I love reading the women's threads on here, because they give a lot of insight. It's still interesting to me how the women on here will read way too much into something small (such as his texting less) and make way too big a deal about it, and ignore huge red flags. Maybe he is texting less because he has a life and he will see you tomorrow? Go to lunch with him tomorrow. You will find out more about him in one hour than you will in 100 loveshack posts. True true. I over think many things in life though, so this isn't the first time (and will definitely not be the last time) that I've done it. I'm just unsure right now if I even want to get to know him. I mean, he seems like a nice guy and all, but if it is that he's lost interest, it's most likely because my friend's boyfriend told him how I'm a "good girl" and how I "don't do anything wrong" like he's told another guy that I was talking to..which caused him to lose interest, and that guy actually told me how he told him. And yeah..I know he has a life hahaha, it's just strange to have a guy wake you up with texts one day asking about you, then the next day, not even responding to your messages. I would have been 100% fine if he didn't even start texting me, and just asked me out and kept it quiet till tomorrow, but when someone starts then stops something..ya gotta wonder why. I just need to get re-excited for my first of many dates since my ex.
Ruby Slippers Posted June 23, 2011 Posted June 23, 2011 OMG you are overanalyzing TEXTS! Sorry, don't mean to laugh, but it seems so ridiculous to a non-20-something. But I DO understand the nerves involved in your first time 'back to bat' after a while. I overanalyzed the hell out of his every move, too. It's just self-protectiveness. It's soooo scary to deal with a man again after one has let you down so hard. But get to it, Soldier Jane. These days, we have to be strong!
Author Lilmisus Posted June 23, 2011 Author Posted June 23, 2011 OMG you are overanalyzing TEXTS! Sorry, don't mean to laugh, but it seems so ridiculous to a non-20-something. But I DO understand the nerves involved in your first time 'back to bat' after a while. I overanalyzed the hell out of his every move, too. It's just self-protectiveness. It's soooo scary to deal with a man again after one has let you down so hard. But get to it, Soldier Jane. These days, we have to be strong! Surprisingly, the texts are the least of my worries, and aren't really one, but I thought I'd throw them in there as a "maybe that's why...?" scenario I think it really has to do with I don't know what he's looking for, and if he already knows (due to our friend) that I'm not it, then that could be why the texts stopped. I've already have had more than enough guys tell me that they found out I was "too good" for them to date. Would suck to have it happen again, after we already have planned out a date and when it's only tomorrow. Plus yeah..having one guy let me down so hard, then finally dating again, makes me really really iffy and scared about things. My ex even told me I was "too good" and "deserved better" and all that bs. I'm sick of hearing it by now, just because I don't drink or do drugs and actually have a future planned out.
oaks Posted June 23, 2011 Posted June 23, 2011 I asked if he still wanted to do lunch tomorrow, and he told me yeah, as long as I was still up for it, to which I said sure. So, he suggested Mexican, and I said that it was fine. Didn't answer the question of when and where though... So why not surprise him by planning the date yourself and calling him up to tell him the details?
Author Lilmisus Posted June 23, 2011 Author Posted June 23, 2011 So why not surprise him by planning the date yourself and calling him up to tell him the details? Well it was decided on some Mexican place that I still don't know the name of, at 1 o'clock. He told me he'd let me know today, but so far no word from him. Last night, my friends helped get me pretty excited to be going on this date, but now..an hour and a half away, I'm not feeling it anymore. I don't know why...but for some reason, I'd seriously just be okay chilling at home, or taking a friend up on her offer of doing lunch instead today. I know that neither of those are options though, since I'm definitely not the type to stand someone up, but still...I don't know what to do to re-enthuse myself..again.
Cee Posted June 23, 2011 Posted June 23, 2011 I suggest that you don't take your emotions seriously. If all of us only followed our hearts, we'd probably stay in bed and skip work in the morning. Or we'd only do stuff when we were happy. Emotions come and go and I read research that a typical emotion only lasts for 1.5 hours. So what that means is that your current emotion will be gone by the time you have your date. In a way, it's good you feel down now because likely your emotions will rise over the next hour. I am a highly emotional person and I treat my feelings like children. When they are bothersome, I tell them to run off and play. And I go on with my day. Have a good date today
Author Lilmisus Posted June 23, 2011 Author Posted June 23, 2011 I just got back from the date. I enjoyed myself, he was good company and it was awesome to talk to someone who is just as sarcastic as I am, and who looked at me like I was beautiful the entire time All in all, it was a good date, minus the fact that there was a movie going on behind him that had a sex scene in it, that was hard to ignore. Thankfully..he didn't turn around But, we ended with a hug, and him telling me that he'd like to take me to the movies sometime, and we decided that once we realized what our schedules were like next week, we'd try to make plans. He offered me to come along to the beach with him, and teach me how to surf (right after lunch), but I didn't have my suit, and didn't really want to..so that was a no go. I'm glad I went though.
oaks Posted June 23, 2011 Posted June 23, 2011 I'm glad I went though. I'm glad you didn't flake on him, too.
Author Lilmisus Posted June 23, 2011 Author Posted June 23, 2011 I'm glad you didn't flake on him, too. He said he was sure I would He was ready to wait a really long time, with a beer and everything just in case. Made me wonder if it happens often, which would be surprising since he's so cute and nice. But I would never do that, even though I did joke around with him about it, and wasn't sure if I wanted to go.
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