Intricategirl Posted June 21, 2011 Posted June 21, 2011 Profession matters, but it's not the be-all, end-all. There are some doctors I wouldn't date because I'd have a hard time with their profession. For example, oncologist would be too difficult. I've briefly dated a locomotive engineer, and that was bananas getting calls at any hour of the day, being told to report to work in two hours. I've dated one and I'm chatting with a second male model. Now, I like to think I'm cute, but it takes a lot of confidence to know that your guy is "prettier" than you, and that he's got to cuddle up with other women and look longingly into their eyes. I've dated a guy who did maintenance at a nursing home, and the pay was crap, but he loved the old people, and it was very sweet. I want a dude that earns enough money that he's not constantly wanting something he can't buy. If the guy's wants and needs are minimal, that makes it easy. I've also dated a guy that made over $250k a year, but constantly worried that it wasn't enough. No fun. I want a guy that I see on a fairly regular basis, so if he has to travel on a moment's notice and I don't know when he'll be back, that's hard to maintain anything. I want a guy with motivation. Even the nursing home dude had motivation outside of that job, and owned his own businesses. The right convenience store worker would make the cut- the wrong lawyer wouldn't.
hannah01 Posted June 22, 2011 Posted June 22, 2011 I think so. Career signifies power and gives out an additional appeal to a man. Thus, career really matters in dating a guy...
Scottdmw Posted June 22, 2011 Posted June 22, 2011 There's a problem with asking women questions like this. At the end of the day, I think what a woman really wants is strong chemistry and attraction. If she experiences that with a man that's the most important thing. This attraction is completely separate from the woman's list of other “wants”. Often times a woman may want someone that shares interests, is nice, can support her, or whatever, but those wants are separate from whether she feels attraction, and the attraction is going to trump the wants most of the time. The problem is that a woman doesn't necessarily know why she feels strong attraction with one man or another. It's largely an unconscious motivation-- she either feels it or she doesn't but may not know why. Now, a particularly honest and introspective woman may be able to watch her own behavior over time and figure out what she truly responds to. She may even be willing to give that information out. However, there are a couple of things in the way of this. A big one is social expectations. Society puts a lot of pressure on women to want one thing or another. Right now it's considered extremely taboo for a woman to be a “golddigger”, if any woman admits to wanting this she would be shunned. On the other hand, people put a lot of pressure on women to “like nice guys” whether they really feel attraction for them or not. It is socially expected of women, so if you ask a woman whether she likes nice guys she may well say yes just because of that social pressure. She knows that if she says “no” she's going to get a self-righteous speech about how shallow she is. All this makes it difficult for a woman to be honest with either herself or other people about which men she's attracted to and why. Further, trying to generalize across all women is pointless. There are always going to be individual exceptions that don't fit the general rule. I do think it's probably true that many women feel attraction for high status men. The women may describe it as “confidence”, “ambition”, “knowing what he wants”, or some other phrase like that. If you ask a particular woman if that's true, she may give a variety of answers but your odds of finding out the true answer are not that good I don't think. Further, the high status thing is only one of a large number of attractive things. If a man is attractive in other ways he doesn't need it. Let's create an analogy with men's attraction, which tends to be more focused on physical features than women's. A lot of men like, for example, big breasts. However, there are some that like small breasts. There are others that don't care one way or the other and instead focus on a woman's legs. Why wouldn't we expect it to be similar with women, except that maybe they care about different things? Scott
Art_Critic Posted June 22, 2011 Posted June 22, 2011 (edited) I think so. Career signifies power and gives out an additional appeal to a man. Thus, career really matters in dating a guy... Where that breaks down is in the definition of career...ie: a school janitor has a career but would that signify power ? A woman might look differently when looking at dating prospects if one was a janitor and the other was a school teacher.. both good careers..both work in the same building.. Edited June 22, 2011 by Art_Critic
Lady vs Panda Posted June 22, 2011 Posted June 22, 2011 Where that breaks down is in the definition of career...ie: a school janitor has a career but would that signify power ? A woman might look differently when looking at dating prospects if one was a janitor and the other was a school teacher.. both good careers..both work in the same building.. Isn't it common to make a distinction between a career and a job?
tman666 Posted June 22, 2011 Posted June 22, 2011 Everyone knows that engineers make the best lovers...
tigressA Posted June 22, 2011 Posted June 22, 2011 Everyone knows that engineers make the best lovers... I am in full agreement with this. :love:
melodymatters Posted June 22, 2011 Posted June 22, 2011 From my teenage years to now (44 and widowed) I have ALWAYS responded to charisma, intelligence, charm, and a strong chemical/attraction bond between us. This has applied to people in all career fields. I think you MIGHT get a few extra points in the beginning with a "cool"job, but just like a hot, brainless bimbo the old saying " Pretty lasts for 15 minutes, then you better have something to back it up" applies, and applies equally for men with high status jobs.
vsmini Posted June 22, 2011 Posted June 22, 2011 Funny you should say doctor's get paid well because with the cost of med school loans and years of low paying residency jobs after med school - it takes forever for an average doctor to really reap the benefits of good pay. They work insane hours and 150K really isn't that much for what they do. I work with doctors who complain about their pay - it's really not worth it to be an MD anymore unless you A. Love the work and don't care about pay or B. Work in private practice and rake it in with a specialty (and also end up working 70 hours a week until retirement) Career used to matter to me in my low-mid twenties and now that I'm pushing thirty career does not matter to me. As long as the person enjoys what they do and they can pay the bills. Anything else is just extra and usually causes more stress than what it's worth. So what if someone is financially secure if it means it's at the cost of their daily well-being staying in misery?
LadyFlame Posted June 23, 2011 Posted June 23, 2011 I can honestly say that I don't care about a man's career/money/car(or lack of) etc. Much more important to me is the depth his mind can travel to, his sexual appeal and the comfort.
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