Hohil Posted June 20, 2011 Posted June 20, 2011 This is a rather... Strange story so please bear with me. So I'm going off to college this fall. I joined the Facebook group for my class and major, and I friend requested everyone in it. A girl from it messaged me to say hey, and before I knew it we had a 3 hour long conversation. We talk for an hour or more almost every day (for the past few weeks) and we both agree that we have a hell of a lot in common. We enjoy the same music, have similar life philosophies, or can just chat about anything and everything for a long time. Before I knew it, I had fallen in love with this girl. It is not simply lust, even though she is pretty attractive, but I genuinely love the person she is. Even among my guy friends there is no one that I click with this much. I talk to her about things that I've never said to anyone else before. Now, she's a few states away so we won't be able to get together this summer. But she already said she wants to hang out with me this fall. I'm not really into the whole casual dating thing, so I wanted to ask her to coffee or something and then just straight out ask her to be my girl. This isn't a problem where I wouldn't have the guts to do it, I got over that hill a while ago and I could confidently ask out anyone that caught my eye. She definitely appears interested in me, usually she starts up the conversations and she "likes" all of the pictures of myself that I post. I'm a pretty attractive guy myself, but more importantly, we click on that mental level. So would asking her to be my girlfriend exclusively after we hang out that first night of college come off as too... Needy or desperate (can't really find the right word)? From what I can tell she doesn't really seem to be into casual dating either. So should I just go for it, based on how much I know about her already and obviously that we'll continue to talk over the summer? Help me out here, I really don't want to let her get away.
alethean Posted June 20, 2011 Posted June 20, 2011 No advice, but this is how one of my friends met her fiance about four years ago, through a facebook group the summer before she went to college. I actually think they became official before college started. I'm rooting for you!
TheCoolest Posted June 20, 2011 Posted June 20, 2011 No. Why? You have never even talked to her in person. You are an attractive male in college. Why go steady with a girl you barely see? Hell if i was you i wouldn't go steady with any girl period. Its dumb to date someone who you will never see. Especially in college. It will be hard for you to be faithful. It will be hard for her to be faithful. There is nothing but heartbreak in the future for both of you. Edit: Ahhh. Just read that over again. She is going to your college. Well that changes things a bit. I suggest that you still take things slow. There is no need to "go steady" the day that you meet her. Hang out with her for a few weeks first. See how she interacts with other people. Go on dates. Then decide if you want to go steady.
youngskywalker Posted June 20, 2011 Posted June 20, 2011 So would asking her to be my girlfriend exclusively after we hang out that first night of college come off as too... Needy or desperate?...........So should I just go for it? Yes, it would seem too desperate. Don't do that. Yes, you should go for it. When you meet up with her the only thing you need to worry about is showing her you had a great evening and you are interested in seeing her again. Set up the next date the same night or asap. The rest will follow if she likes you.
OldOnTheInside Posted June 21, 2011 Posted June 21, 2011 (edited) http://www.thatsweird.net/news39.shtml ^ That's a strange story. I've done what you are proposing in my younger days. How I met my now ex-wife (don't get me wrong, the marriage was a pleasant one overall). As with everything else in life, you can't tell the future, so you won't really know until you try it. Anyway, I would suggest that you not rush into things. Some girls don't mind what you are suggesting, but some will end up being scared away. Get to really know her first before discussing this. She may consider it to be desperate, she may not. You don't know. From what I can tell she doesn't really seem to be into casual dating either.Take that into consideration, but don't make too many assumptions. Edited June 21, 2011 by OldOnTheInside
Author Hohil Posted June 21, 2011 Author Posted June 21, 2011 Hmm thanks for the responses. I'm going to continue talking to her over the summer, and decide what to do from there. I'm more inclined to just go for it, because she seems to be the kind of girl that wouldn't be turned off by that kind of thing.
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