CurlyIam Posted April 19, 2004 Posted April 19, 2004 How long do you think love lasts? As long as you feel the lust? As long as sex isn't boring? As long as he makes you laugh?
Papillon Posted April 19, 2004 Posted April 19, 2004 You're equating the wrong things to love, that's all I can say. Love isn't a Duracell, dammit. Old people who do'nt lust after each other's bodies anymore, does that mean the love is gone? Ditto the sex? I know many people who crack me up, but I don't love them.
Author CurlyIam Posted April 19, 2004 Author Posted April 19, 2004 Ok, here's why I post this. I have had this 4 years long relationship. Can't say I was too attracted to him (sexually speaking), but I was a virgin at the time, I didn't give it much tought. He was a wonderful, incredible,amazing guy, we know each other perfectly, he supports me and would do everything for me. But he didn't give me much room to breathe (he had this strong personality, would have tones of friends and we would go out partying all the time... I ended up alone in the process,as it was so much easier just being with his friends, no sacrifices necessary, still tones of fun etc), I started little by little to feel uncomfortable, to want my space. We lived together for like 2 years and... let's say I kinda lost my interest in him - still sexually speaking . He was still a great guy,we would talk about anything, communicate etc.... I dumped him. Why? because I didn't want to be 23 and stay with a great guy who my very well be my soul-mate, but for whom I didn't feel the butterflies in my stomach, or for whom I didn't fantesize about staying up and making love all night ( a bit too explicit, I know ) I mean ... long term relationships ... do they involve a different kind of love?
Papillon Posted April 19, 2004 Posted April 19, 2004 There is no checklist to what constitutes love. You will realise it when it's no longer there. The butterflies definitely disappear, but not the real love. Too many people equate the death of the butterflies with the death of love, and I hope you haven't made that mistake.
Arabess Posted April 19, 2004 Posted April 19, 2004 I would imagine MOST relationships get to a point where the ectasy and butterflies no longer exist. I know whatever it's replaced by or evolves into is supposed to be the the true foundation of the relationship. For some people a relationship which reaches this stage is more fulfilling to them. For others, it becomes down right boring. It's a personal call. For me, if I don't feel excited about rolling over to my partner in the morning.....I'd just as soon wake up alone. And do. It's not a preference for everyone though.
lostforwords Posted April 19, 2004 Posted April 19, 2004 How long does love last??? hmmm... depends on what state you live in i think.... for example if you live in Alabama.... 5 minutes.... Montana.... 273 hours..... Florida and Alberta.... as fast as you can say "Thank you" to the guy that buys you a beer and a chicken wing dinner... ROFL [color=blue]dedicated to my girly girl Arabess and myself ofcourse....[/color]
Author CurlyIam Posted April 19, 2004 Author Posted April 19, 2004 Yeah,thanks, Lostforwords... very reasuring answer... got any for people who don't live in the US?
lostforwords Posted April 19, 2004 Posted April 19, 2004 Curly, you cant put a time frame with love..... people dont get into a relationship with just a "2 year" expiry date..... love is what you make it..... it can be as passionate as you allow it to be or make it.... i really dont believe there is a true answer for this question....
Papillon Posted April 19, 2004 Posted April 19, 2004 Well, I guess you could replace the chicken wings with frog's legs, erm?
Author CurlyIam Posted April 19, 2004 Author Posted April 19, 2004 Please, I got a romantic invitation to eat... snails yesterday, so don't remind, me, will you?
lostforwords Posted April 19, 2004 Posted April 19, 2004 nothing wrong with snails.... mmmm never had frog legs but im always willing to try things once....
lostforwords Posted April 19, 2004 Posted April 19, 2004 Im with you papillon... i love escargot... but i also love a good wing too.... ah to hell with it.... just give me a damn sampler....
Author CurlyIam Posted April 19, 2004 Author Posted April 19, 2004 I would like to know why would you leave an otherwise good relationship... what exactly would make you get up and leave from one...
lostforwords Posted April 19, 2004 Posted April 19, 2004 who you asking? you asking why YOU would leave an otherwise good relationship?????? gee..... you would know that as well.... you obviously werent happy in your relationship.... everyone makes decisions they feel is right for themselves....
Papillon Posted April 19, 2004 Posted April 19, 2004 When your SO starts loving frog-legs and you hate'em with passion. No, seriously, Curly, it's a zero-sum game. Do you think you'd be happier single? If so, then go for it. It sounds like you've already made up your mind and are looking for justifications. You won't find them here. You will only know until after you actually made that leap.
lostforwords Posted April 19, 2004 Posted April 19, 2004 ..... or when the wing doesnt stir up deep desires of sexual tensions??
Author CurlyIam Posted April 19, 2004 Author Posted April 19, 2004 Not to worry, I already did.I thought it was an ancient history, I am seeing someone else now, but... he called today, you know, "that" kind of two hours long call and... he made me feel guilty. So I was wondering....
Author CurlyIam Posted April 19, 2004 Author Posted April 19, 2004 Originally posted by lostforwords nothing wrong with snails.... mmmm never had frog legs but im always willing to try things once.... I love snails myself...as long as they're happy living on the leaves in my garden, not on a freshly seasoned with garlic sauce in my plate, thank you very much!
Arabess Posted April 19, 2004 Posted April 19, 2004 Originally posted by lostforwords Florida and Alberta.... as fast as you can say "Thank you" to the guy that buys you a beer and a chicken wing dinner... [color=blue]dedicated to my girly girl Arabess and myself ofcourse....[/color] Too friggin funny! I have fell in deep passionate love many times over the 4th free beer!
Author CurlyIam Posted April 19, 2004 Author Posted April 19, 2004 So no 4-th beer, no love or are you just so disappointed that you're leaving the guy!
lostforwords Posted April 19, 2004 Posted April 19, 2004 hell im smitten at the first free beer.... and nothing says i love you more than a suicide wing dipped in ranch.....
Arabess Posted April 19, 2004 Posted April 19, 2004 Originally posted by CurlyIam So no 4-th beer, no love or are you just so disappointed that you're leaving the guy! Correct. No 4th beer....no chance of love. HAHA!
shamen Posted April 19, 2004 Posted April 19, 2004 I think that love changes over time. It can't be that crazy ecstatic feeling that you have in the beginning forever. Love becomes almost something simple... something that sits in your center (wherever you believe that is), reassuring, unlike the butterflies.
Author CurlyIam Posted April 19, 2004 Author Posted April 19, 2004 God, shamen, I so know what you're talking about... I totally forgot how that felt
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