Is it worth it?

[Nukulus]

Well, I had a 5 hour long drive this afternoon to sit with my thoughts and I really started to question things.

 

I'll give a bit of background. I just got a job in Cincinnati and moved out here roughly a month ago. I am on a dating site and am currently emailing/texting a few back and forth. I have not met up with any of them because I have been busy trying to get settled, new job, etc.

 

As you could probably tell I am also single. I don't mind being single, I'm actually quite content, and in most cases I have an amazing time being single. Take this weekend, I went back home to visit family and friends and ended up meeting this amazing girl. We hit it off and spent most of the night together (doing practically everything but full on intercourse). This is a girl I'd be highly interested in getting to know, but unfortunately (as it often is for me haha), as luck would have it she lives closer to the east coast. So we are 10-12 hour drive from each other. Chances are we will probably never run into each other again which is real shame if you ask me.

 

So this leads me to my question. I am happy being single, but I think I am also in a position of wanting more for my life, something more significant, more stable. However, I am hugely worried that if I start dating someone just to be dating SOMEONE then I might miss out on something amazing. I know most will be thinking that I'm just one of those "grass is always greener" but I'm not. I'm worried about becoming one of those people that just has to be dating someone, because they can't be alone. Like whether the SO is an amazing soulmate type or if they are just someone around to keep them company. The reason why this worries me, is because if I become committed to someone then that's it. I won't stray. I will break up with someone before I do anything like that. I mean I have a hard enough time wrapping my head around talking to multiple girls at once that I haven't actually met yet.

 

So people of LS (those that are always in a relationship and those that are perpetually single) Do you think it's worth it? Do you date people just to be dating them, even if you don't think anything will work out in the long term? Say if the person your dating is good but not great or amazing?

 

I think for myself, so that I can be sure, I'm not settling for anything but amazing. I think this is one area in my life where I don't want to settle for mediocrity. If that's the case I'd rather stay single.

 

Sorry for the long winded thoughts/rants, but I'd love to hear your opinions on the subject.

[thatone]

you sound like me 10 years ago, to be honest. nothing but short term dating, month or two relationships at most, when i was in my 20s. if there was a better job opportunity somewhere else, even perceived opportunity, i was gone and had no intentions of taking anyone with me.

 

looking back on it, that was a mistake. there were quite a few very good prospects for long term relationships in those years that i passed on.

 

what you haven't figured out yet, because it takes until your mid to late 30s to figure out, is your opinions about life will change. professional success and freedom isn't enough. if you care to take my word for that, do yourself a favor and date more. you don't have to desperately seek a wife, but don't eliminate possibilities just because you can.