just_scott Posted June 19, 2011 Posted June 19, 2011 HI about a month ago my girlfriend just left me ,no goodbye no letter nothing. it came out of the blue . here's my story i'm 47 now she's 50 .we met at work ,became friends.she was married, i was just out of a 11 yr relationship .she ended up getting separated ,during this time we never did anything more than hug hello and goodbye.She was moving belongings i helped her with that .ONCE the divorce was finalized we'd just hang out from time to time for about a month .we started dating exclusively. WE we're in LOVE big time .she's told her parents she's crazy about me ,told people she could never nor want to hurt me cause i was soo good to her unlike her x husband.we had a strong connecting . WE'VE had minor issues nothing big we never raised our voices to each other or got in shouting matches .SHE has 2 teenage boys from her marriage, the x bad mouths me so doesn't want me around the kids,she got her own place so she can see her kids.i understood all that . LATER into our relationship we talk she says she doesn't see us taking the next steps until both kids are grown 18, or 21 i'm o.k. with that and try to be supportive . NOW lately she seems distant from me ,her kids,work,her dad is ill etc all on her mind .i understand.THEN some flat out lies i've caught her in and when i did i bought them to her attention we discussed the issues one weekend she told me her son had a double header ball game and would see me after i find out their is no ball game,when i see her i ask her about it -she tells me she spent the day with her son ,i say cool BUT you could have just called and told me ,her reply she doesn't want to ''check in'' whenever plans change ,i say well just out of respect .the issue gets put to rest. ONE Sun night she comes over my place asks if i've had dinner yet i said i hadn't ,she cooks us dinner she's still acting distant towards me we small chat .she says she's fine. i had to go lend the neighbor an extension cord told her i'll be a min, she says o.k. i come back to my place my backdoor is closing she's in the parking lot ,i go after her ask what's wrong ,i get no reply .we get into a discussion ,she ends up going to her place , says she'll see me later in the week. I come back in on my counter is a box with all the jewelery i gave her , i call her no answer.next day i call at work she says she doesn't love me anymore, and isn't in love with me anymore and it's over .... I am shocked and hurt big time ,i try to make arrangements for us to sit and talk she doesn't want to it wouldn't change anything she says .I offer we go talk to one of the pastors we know she agrees great i think the morning of our meeting she calls me and cancels ,i ask what have i done ? she says i did nothing ,it's her .i ask her for an explanation she tells me their isn't one and doesn't always need to be one . I drop by her place to talk i tell her please help me understand this ,theirs nothing to understand we're not a couple ,i'm not your girl, we can be friends but just the kind that call each other once in a while to say hi . NOW i am moving and have some things of hers and stuff from here she likes .i call and ask her when she'd like to get them , she says she'll let me know i should take them and keep them for her , i say no problem . AGAIN i ask just to sit and talk with me so i can understand she stops by i read her somethings i've written she said it was nice ,i say i don't believe anything catastrophic happened between us that we can't talk about and work through she agrees BUT says she has nothing to sat ,i say i'm moving a new environment maybe good for us i'd like you to be a part of it, let me move get settled in invite you over we talk ,she says she'll check out my new place when she wants to, she's having fun doing what she's doing lately -i say i always wanted you to have fun with your kids,family,girl friends and then when your done with time with them we can have our time she doesn't want anything to do with me ,i did nothing wrong,i shouldn't think of her etc . AFTER 4 yrs together how can she just turn off her emotions ? we both agreed we weren't ''re bound'' relationships for each other,she agrees we fell deeply in love .NOW i call i get ignored , i leave a message -no reply I even said in the past when you messed up you asked me to forgive you and i have and you asked if i'd take her back and i have with open arms ,NOW i'm asking for just one chance and she says she don't know if she can do that .theirs been no contact or very extremely minimal for a month now . I am hurt,confused,sad,EVEN guilt i did something and broke her heart , i don't sleep ,or eat much , i don't feel much like doing anything. I hope and pray they'll be a knock on my door one night and it will be her and ready to talk and give us another try i still love her deeply she was my everything all i wanted was to make her happy and be supportive and give her unconditional true love .i know her girlfriends that don't even know me or met me even are in her ear and she's listening to them for some reason ,she's just not acting like the woman i met and fell in love with . scott Their is no chance of her getting back with her ex he is re married now .I believe she is either seeing someone else or has been seeing someone behind my back .
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