the_special_one Posted June 18, 2011 Posted June 18, 2011 Ok, about one month ago I noticed an attractive woman that lives opposite me (it's just apartments where I live) and she came out on the balcony and I had asked her, what her name was - she told me and by the looks of things I thought I could develop a relationship. The next time I saw her on her balcony I went over and said to her; how about you take my number? She said no. So I said can I take yours - then she said why? I said to her - so I can get to know you, then she says I think I'm abit too old for you, so I said it doesn't matter, then she says well next time I'm out here you can chat to me! So I thought ok fine. Then a few days later I thought it was quite rude how I had asked for her number straight up like that so I bought a bunch of flowers and tossed it up on her balcony. She didnt see me do this but I know she realises they are from me. So then I see her a couple of days later but I dont say nothing and thats how it was for a while. Then recently after a while of not seeing her; I was outside my apartment and she came out at the same time, she was on the phone and she clearly saw me but acted like she never. Then she did something that made me think - she sat outside and she was messing with her long-dressed skirt showing off her legs - obvioulsy because she knew I was looking. What should I do when I see her next? Try to start a conversation? Or just leave it because she is just playing games? I dont know! But I actually want to develop a relationship with this person but I dont know if she is just cock teasing! Sometimes when I see her I dont feel I have the courage to talk to her because of what she might say but its getting to me now each time I see her. Some body Help!
Shaun-Dro Posted June 18, 2011 Posted June 18, 2011 Ok, about one month ago I noticed an attractive woman that lives opposite me (it's just apartments where I live) and she came out on the balcony and I had asked her, what her name was - she told me and by the looks of things I thought I could develop a relationship. The next time I saw her on her balcony I went over and said to her; how about you take my number? She said no. So I said can I take yours - then she said why? I said to her - so I can get to know you, then she says I think I'm abit too old for you, so I said it doesn't matter, then she says well next time I'm out here you can chat to me! So I thought ok fine. Then a few days later I thought it was quite rude how I had asked for her number straight up like that so I bought a bunch of flowers and tossed it up on her balcony. She didnt see me do this but I know she realises they are from me. So then I see her a couple of days later but I dont say nothing and thats how it was for a while. Then recently after a while of not seeing her; I was outside my apartment and she came out at the same time, she was on the phone and she clearly saw me but acted like she never. Then she did something that made me think - she sat outside and she was messing with her long-dressed skirt showing off her legs - obvioulsy because she knew I was looking. What should I do when I see her next? Try to start a conversation? Or just leave it because she is just playing games? I dont know! But I actually want to develop a relationship with this person but I dont know if she is just cock teasing! Sometimes when I see her I dont feel I have the courage to talk to her because of what she might say but its getting to me now each time I see her. Some body Help! How could you not have the courage to talk to her when you already did? You're jumping way ahead of yourself with the relationship talk. Just talk to her some more and slow down. You don't know anything about her to want a relationship, okay? Get to know her first before you consider moving to the next level of trying to take her out on a date or whatever. Relationships don't start any where within this time frame until both parties are comfortable enough to pursue this contract, so keep your pen and paper at home for now.
Author the_special_one Posted June 18, 2011 Author Posted June 18, 2011 Yeah true, but what am I supposed to say when I next see her? Hey can I get to know you?
Author the_special_one Posted June 18, 2011 Author Posted June 18, 2011 It will seem odd because the amount of times I seen her but said nothing!
SpiralOut Posted June 18, 2011 Posted June 18, 2011 You don't need to take her out on a date in order to get to know her. She is right there. Try asking her how her day was, what is she up to this weekend, isn't the weather lovely, etc. Just keep up the casual conversation whenever you bump into each other and maybe eventually she'll feel comfortable enough with you to want to spend more time with you. As a woman, I can tell you that she wants to go onto her balcony without being hit on. And if she's pretty, she probably has a lot of weird guys go after her so you'll want to be careful to not come on too strong, so she doesn't get the wrong idea. Just be casual and relaxed and treat her like you'd treat someone you're trying to become friends with and I'm sure you'll do alright. Good luck!
Author the_special_one Posted June 18, 2011 Author Posted June 18, 2011 To be honest I dont even beat around the bush - I just wana get straight to the point because what is the point talking and it really dont get you anywhere? I understand its important to build a rapport with some one before things progress but how will I know if things will develop?
Shaun-Dro Posted June 18, 2011 Posted June 18, 2011 To be honest I dont even beat around the bush - I just wana get straight to the point because what is the point talking and it really dont get you anywhere? I understand its important to build a rapport with some one before things progress but how will I know if things will develop? For one, stop wasting time here talking with us and get talking to her.
iris219 Posted June 18, 2011 Posted June 18, 2011 You're saying some really crazy things. What would possibly make you think this woman is playing games? I had asked her, what her name was - she told me and by the looks of things I thought I could develop a relationship. Huh? This makes no sense. How can you want a relationship with a person you don't know based on them telling you their name? how about you take my number? She said no. So I said can I take yours - then she said why? I said to her - so I can get to know you, then she says I think I'm abit too old for you, so I said it doesn't matter She was being very straightforward here. No games. She's not interested and told you so in a very upfront manner, and she was pretty nice about it too. She's asking you to not hit on her. I bought a bunch of flowers and tossed it up on her balcony. She didnt see me do this but I know she realises they are from me Is she psychic? I was outside my apartment and she came out at the same time, she was on the phone and she clearly saw me but acted like she never. Because she wants you to leave her alone. Or, she really didn't notice you because you're not someone she thinks about. Or, she did know about the flowers and it creeped her out. she sat outside and she was messing with her long-dressed skirt showing off her legs - obvioulsy because she knew I was looking. She was NOT doing this for you.
Author the_special_one Posted June 19, 2011 Author Posted June 19, 2011 (edited) LOL you must be the woman herself or psychic! Edited June 19, 2011 by the_special_one
Finch Posted June 19, 2011 Posted June 19, 2011 It doesn't sound at all like she's playing games. It sounds like she's not interested and is trying to avoid you. She did not want to give you her number, she did not want your number. She said she was too old for you. Instead of backing off you throw flowers on her balcony. That would make most women uncomfortable. It's quite probable that you are bothering her. If you keep this up she may start to feel harassed and file a complaint against you.
spiderowl Posted June 21, 2011 Posted June 21, 2011 You've got a thing about this woman and are probably seeing things through dodgy spectacles. She has said she's older than you so she probably thinks you are just a kid who is looking for sex. If you think about that, all the things you've done so far will just appear immature in her eyes. Yes, it was kind of you to get her flowers but if she thinks you are driven more by your penis than reason, she won't take them terribly seriously. She won't know what to say either. Does she thank you and encourage you, despite the age difference, or does she just ignore it on the basis that she can't be sure you sent them anyway? How much older is she? You see an attractive woman. She is probably wondering what a young guy sees in her and is suspicious. Do you really want anything more than to score here? Be honest with yourself? Women are astute and will suss your motives. Given that you are looking at her through your testosterone-fuelled spectacles, it's quite likely that when she was sitting on the balcony she was not deliberately showing you her legs. She was probably just sitting on the balcony and happens to be an attractive woman with nice legs. Do not assume that she is flirting with you - you want her to do this, it doesn't mean she is! If you want to get to know her, just talk to her like a normal human being when she's on her balcony. Be the kind, sweet, rational guy she'd like to get to know, not the sex-driven young guy she suspects you are. Get to know her as a person and if she grows to like and trust you, who knows how it will turn out. Don't assume that she is deliberately trying to turn you on though or she is seriously going to get fed up of your leering.
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