LjHappyDays Posted June 15, 2011 Posted June 15, 2011 I'm just curious, I started sleeping with this guy about a year ago... (only for about a month) I have recently split up with my ex and obviously it happened again, i'm curious when you guys sleep with somebody on a regular basis, is there actual feelings? (im not saying i want there to be) Im just wondering because its sharing a bed, laughing talking etc, surely there has to be something there ? Not Just sex???? HHmmmmm Thanks in advance guys !
TimothyParadox Posted June 16, 2011 Posted June 16, 2011 Is this some kind of joke? I never even knew sex without love was possible. I wouldn't even consider it.
jabo0112 Posted June 17, 2011 Posted June 17, 2011 To be honest with you it all depends on the guy and the timing (probably a combination). It also depends on how you approach the situation. Is there more than just sex involved? Does he ever imply he likes you away from the bedroom? For some guys it can totally just be a booty call. If a cute girl calls him and its a guaranteed lay, then it is what it is. For others, these types of things only happen with people they have feelings for. Then it is up to you or him to see if there is more to it. I'm not sure about the kind of guy this is so I can't tell you more.
Author LjHappyDays Posted June 17, 2011 Author Posted June 17, 2011 Timothy - Thats Sweeeeeet! Jabo - Your right yeah, well its like we have a laugh etc, the thing that annoys me is when he like kisses me on the head and cuddles upto me.... which is weird for me cos im only used to BF's doing this? I dont no i think there could be more to it, but its sooooo awkward bcos he knows my ex and although they arent the best of friends its still bloody awkward. And hes like ''stay the night dont go'' But i no not to look to deep into it!
spiderowl Posted June 18, 2011 Posted June 18, 2011 Yes, guys can be affectionate when they are mainly interested in sex. I don't know what proportion of guys are like this but some definitely are. If I'm being cynical (and I am sometimes), I'd say that some of the guys who are interested in more than just sex aren't really very affectionate either and I wonder if they are drive more by the need to possess than to love. There is a big difference.
carhill Posted June 18, 2011 Posted June 18, 2011 OP, it's a human question. Can you fµck a guy and not feel anything akin to love and emotional attachment? From reading your post, it sounds like you can. Hence, there are members of the male gender with similar psychologies. Find them. Be happy.
jabo0112 Posted June 21, 2011 Posted June 21, 2011 Carhill....you have to be one of the most straightforward and true people I've ever met and I've only seen a few of your posts. It's appreciated! No beating around the bush and to top it off you are spot on. Me personally, I don't get off on just the sex. Even if it is not meant to be something long term, I still enjoy the intimacy. If it isn't the same for you LJ...then Carhill is right...find someone who isn't into the intimacy!
Author LjHappyDays Posted June 21, 2011 Author Posted June 21, 2011 Yeah thats correct, i think its definately the need to posses and have something they want rather than love.
wny Posted June 26, 2011 Posted June 26, 2011 Coming from the gay male perspective, I can say I've encountered many people in my life and friendships that I've learned are only interested in sex for sex. In fact, bringing "emotions" into it literally drives them away because they don't want "complications." That doesn't work well for me. I have to have an emotional bond of some kind to someone or things just don't work (physically). I've learned to see sex as something more than the hearts and flowers stuff of cheesy date movies. There are people having sex because it feels good, period.
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