inandouttalove Posted June 14, 2011 Posted June 14, 2011 Its been 3 wks since there has been NC with my ex on his part .There was no formal breakup not a word about why or what happened just sort of stopped calling and totally ignoring me. A few days ago as I stated in another thread I had a moment of weakness and called him as this has been bothering me just trying to get an explanation of sorts why someone who treated me so wonderfullyand claimed we were going to marry even gave me a promise ring etc.. all of a sudden fell off the face of the earth. I did call and I heard his cell phone pick up (then I heard a click he just hung up) that was adding more salt to an already large wound. It hurt me but as the days go on (and there have been bad days where there have been constant tears, pain etc...I figure that I must leave it behind me. Would I even want him back in my life if he could treat me so cold.How could someone who told you they loved you everyday just ignore you and write you off so easily? Does he think that when or even if he does decide to initiate contact I will be there with open arms picking up right where we left off. He did this once before ignore me but it was for a few days and now its been 3 wks but im guessing he has a new(rebound) gf.He would have spoken to me unless someone else is taking up his time.I dont understand how someone whom you were close with can so easily turn on you.I didn't do anything either I was very nice and sweet and loving and caring. His moods are always that of hot and cold. I have been getting on with my life doing things that interest me keeping myself busy and now I have this kind of anger towards him because I am a good person and at least I deserved an explanation instead of him just being a coward .It would have been nice but that's the way it goes. I really don't have any need or want to call him I think him hanging up on me was the last straw. I am better than that than to wait around like some love sick girl. If he doesn't wanna be with me than its his loss. I have plenty to offer someone, and I deserve a loving normal relationship with someone who doesn't play games or isn't moody. I am better than that .He is a 35 yr old man who acted like an immature child . This is a lesson learned. If he ever does call I don't even think I want him in my life even if just on a friendly basis. What he did was awful and it hurt me but I'm strong I have been through a lot and this is just a bump in the road and I believe there are good people out there hidden among the dumpers of the world I just have to have faith.
Trovador Posted June 14, 2011 Posted June 14, 2011 Once I stopped responding calls and mails from a gf (by then my ex) and I realize now that she must have thought and lived the same you are doing now. You see, I never bothered myself to break up properly with her, although I think I wrote once to her asking her not to contact me anymore. I am not sure. Anyway, I disappeared from her life and refused all her eager attempts to contact me (boy, she was persistent!) until she got tired or she did realize fully that I didn't want anything to do with her. She must think of me as a cold, mean and coward son of a gun... But truth is she did it to herself. She knew how I hated that she went out with other guys (we were coworkers, so she "had to keep appearances and dilute the impact of going out exclusively with me"). I asked her not to do it, especially with a guy who had the shots for her. But she kept doing it. It was only after so many fights and the real danger of ending the relationship from my part, that she agreed to stop. Nominally. But she did it at my back, when I was on a leave. The guy himself told me, although I suspected it. She didn't answer my calls that day, she seemed nervous later... And that was it. I ended things my way. She never received an explanation or closure from me, but she must suspect (or that I'd like to think) why I dumped her the way I did... Not saying this happened to you... just sharing an anecdote and maybe, just maybe, showing that sometimes people just give up, without regrets or doubts, without bothering themselves to say goodbye...
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