IceIceBaby Posted June 11, 2011 Posted June 11, 2011 My boyfriend is an executive chef at a restaurant. He works very long hours and often at night since dinner is often the busiest time. He just rolled out a new menu and for the past couple of weeks he's been working all nights. I work M-F 9-5. At this point, we only see each other once a week. Usually Saturday night when he gets out and then Sunday during the day. Now he's been working more and I haven't been seeing him until 9 or 10 on Saturday night because that's when he gets off work or that's when the event/wedding is over. And he's also been having to go in on Sundays for a while. Now I'm miserable and I'm not really sure what the point of this relationship is anymore. He's so busy that normally I only talk to him on the phone for about 10 minutes each day and I barely see him. What's the point? I hate to nag him about it because it's work, but this is just not working for me. And he'll find time to leave work to play hockey. And he was able to take all of next week off to go fishing. I've been begging him for months to take a 2 or 3 day small trip with me and he can't find the time. And the thing that makes it worse is that we both live at home. We're way too old to live at home, but we both just moved back to our home state just over a year ago after renting in NYC. So we're been living home to try and save to buy houses of our own. So it's not like I can go to his house and wait for him to get home and spend a couple nights during the week with him. I just don't know what to do anymore. I love hanging out with him and want to see him more but it's just not possible. Is anyone else with someone who works alot? How are you handling it? Thanks!
vsmini Posted June 11, 2011 Posted June 11, 2011 This is too weird. My BF and I live in NYC right now and are thinking about both going back to our home state (we're both from said state but met each other out here in NYC) so we can save. I have a pretty good job here lined up but he has a job back in the midwest where he could earn a really good amount of money and save a bunch so we can move and get a home together (which will be in another state). I'm hesitant because I know this job, though it pays very nicely, will keep him working 12-18 hours a day.....and that will be tough. Best scenario money-wise: I stay here in NYC and earn with my job and he goes back to MI and works. Sounds like we'll probably see each other just as much flying back and forth. So strange how our situations are/will end up being similar. ANYWAY: Good news is that he sounds pretty committed to you by working hard to save money for a home. Has marriage been talked about? It is important for him to have his fishing trips and such but you need to be a priority - this goes with out question. Put your foot down honey. You deserve to have a substantial portion of his time as the fish do. Have a serious talk with him about it.
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