eleanorhurting Posted June 10, 2011 Posted June 10, 2011 6 months several dates later and im still hurting over my ex. I still miss him I would give everything that I do not have to do everything differently and have him back. I dont know what to do anymore i have gone to counseling I have "dated" other people over the last 2 months... I just dont think I'm ever going to find anyone like him again. And it kills me it was all my fault. I cry everyday. I am studying for my board exam and I am a wreck Around March I was able to "get better" and stop being a depressed mess and I started going out there and meeting people but it has honestly been so dissapointing... it just makes me more angry part of me just wants to accept that I'm going to live a lonely life for a long time where I am constantly reminded of what I foolishly lost. When I was busy doing a million things everything was great Now that I am stuck in my room every single day studying for this stupid test, things are not so great.
0hpenelope Posted June 11, 2011 Posted June 11, 2011 Your healing will take time. What a hard lesson to learn... I empathize with you, the pain of your loss, especially when you know you're in the wrong, is sharp right now. Have you worked on forgiving yourself? Did you do something good for yourself today?
skibum Posted June 11, 2011 Posted June 11, 2011 I have my Boards next Wednesday and I told myself I wouldnt get on here but I figured since Im about to go to bed itd be fine since Ive been studying all day. Theres another poster on here who took his boards a few weeks ago and its funny how the Step seems make getting over the ex so much harder. I dont know your story but I can empathize with you how sitting in a room all day makes it tough to focus on the work. I got dumped by the gf of over 5 years about a month and a half ago and it made studying so much more difficult. But I am not going to let her selfishness affect my score. I kno once its over Ill wish I spent less time thinking about her and more on the test. In the end Ive learned from reading stuff on this site that its all in you. You cannot depend on someone else for your happiness and once you realize that they are not in charge of your success and joy it makes it eassier to work on yourself. I hope you can focus and do well and believe me I understand how difficult it is. Sorry if this doesnt make sense Ive been cramming First Aid all day and am well on my way towards going crazy from all this studying. Itll be easier once rotations start and the test is out of the way. Minor speedbump
Author eleanorhurting Posted June 11, 2011 Author Posted June 11, 2011 its funny to hear someone say first aid here!!! im sorry to hear this happened so close to your date. mine happened way back in december...i just have had a hard time letting go...and when im stressed i remember how my bf used to be my cheerleader and my security blanket and i think of how things would be less ****ty if i had not screwed up our relationship and it just makes me more sad. im trying i really am. good luck on your test and im sure you will find someone new with time.
Author eleanorhurting Posted September 14, 2011 Author Posted September 14, 2011 Hi!!! I was looking at my old threads and I just felt it was right to announce that I passed my board!!!!!! I was heartbroken as hell and in the middle of dating somoene who was i was probably not supposed to be dating and I was frustrated all the time and blaming myself and just really really in a poop-hole. And I passed!!!!!!!! Huge accomplishment! Pat in the back for me I deserved it. Looking at this makes me want to move forward with my life. I hope it will for someone out there too.
ConfusedT Posted September 16, 2011 Posted September 16, 2011 congratz on passing the boards! also, i have been on 8 million dates &.... i still cry bc of my ex douchebag. dont feel bad, time will heal and we will move on!
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