Unbalanced Posted June 9, 2011 Posted June 9, 2011 (edited) Over the past month and change my girlfriend has fainted about 3 or more times while she was alone. She tells me about these episodes and it really worries me especially because when we first started dating about 2 months ago she told me that she has fainted a lot, but hasn't in over 6 months. She is currently doing this new diet which I am thinking might be contributing to this where she eats less than 800 calories a day with little to no carbohydrate consumption. She is also anemic which makes me worry even more about her health choices. She refuses to see a doctor or do any kind of lifestyle change that may result in less frequent fainting. We are supposed to go cliff diving together this weekend, and I'm becoming really afraid that she may just faint at the wrong moment and really injure herself... She is only 21, and I feel like she should not be going through these episodes, and they are really beginning to worry me and make me feel anxious...I don't want to seem like i'm nagging her, but I wish there was something I could do to help and she has currently been sick for over a week with headaches, chest pains, and congestion. she was given antibiotics, but she just hasn't been disciplined in taking them continuously... Edited June 9, 2011 by Unbalanced
Citizen Erased Posted June 9, 2011 Posted June 9, 2011 Her diet is very unhealthy. 800 calories a day, plus being anemic, and I am surprised she's only fainted 3 times.
alethean Posted June 9, 2011 Posted June 9, 2011 Hey, I'm quite anemic, and it sucks the life out of me as is. I can't imagine not having a balanced diet on top of the condition. Idk, it looks like your gf doesn't take her health all that seriously. Has she told you why she won't see a dr.?
Cee Posted June 9, 2011 Posted June 9, 2011 It sounds like she has an eating disorder. No person would starve themselves to the point of having symptoms unless they had a compulsion to do so. I suggest you get support from a professional. She may not see a doctor, but you can talk to someone who specializes in these disorders. There are factsheets on the internet about what very low calorie diets to the body. Maybe she can get scared into seeking help, but I doubt it. I'm sorry that there isn't more you can do, but try to maintain your own health and balance during this difficult time.
stepka Posted June 9, 2011 Posted June 9, 2011 Do you know her parents? I think you should contact them. I know if I was her mom I'd want to know so I could get her help. And yeah, I'm anemic too and it will make you faint and losing too much weight can cause you to become anemic or more anemic than you already were. My dd went on a crash diet once and got severely anemic and about half of her hair fell out so you can tell your gf that--maybe vanity will cause her to get help. She should at least take iron pills and B-12 and a stool softener with them b/c they will really constipate a person.
denise_xo Posted June 9, 2011 Posted June 9, 2011 She's clearly not taking her health seriously at all and apart from communicating your concerns clearly there's unfortunately not much you can do about it. I would cancel the cliff diving, though, for safety reasons, but that might also give her a little wake up call.
carhill Posted June 9, 2011 Posted June 9, 2011 If she refuses to see a doctor, how did she get the antibiotics? IMO, the syncope, combined with her diet and refusal of medical care, indicates an eating disorder and/or some form of body dysmorphia; a combination of physical and psychological issues. Obviously, she needs a medical and/or psychiatric professional to make an accurate diagnosis. TBH, short of her family intervening, there's really little one can legally do if someone is hell bent on ruining their health/life. Just ask the partners of any alcoholic or drug addict. I'd definitely tell her family. Caution: Families can sometimes be weird about this kind of stuff, so don't be surprised if you end up under the bus. Still, it's the humane thing to do, IMO. Show her love and support, but refrain from taking on her condition emotionally. It's her issue. As suggested, cancel the cliff diving, citing your concerns. Take positive actions yourself. She can react how she reacts. Accept that. Good luck
stepka Posted June 9, 2011 Posted June 9, 2011 Another thing is that if she has been drinking a lot of diet soda, that could contribute to the fainting since aspartame has been known to cause some (including me) to have seizures, which in my case looked more like fainting than a grand mal seizure. I'm with Denise--don't take her cliff diving--too dangerous, and be sure to tell her why. I'm also with Cee--it sounds like an eating disorder. And not taking her antibiotics is just plain socially irresponsible.
Dorie Posted June 9, 2011 Posted June 9, 2011 She's self abusing sounds like. Perhaps it's an eating disorder, yes but not taking the medication suggests a lack of motivation to self care in many facets. I wish you luck in having a heartfelt talk. Expect some resistance initially but don't be put off. Allow your words to sink in and for her to digest them (poor choice of words) for a few hours.
Jaytb Posted June 10, 2011 Posted June 10, 2011 Over the past month and change my girlfriend has fainted about 3 or more times while she was alone. She tells me about these episodes and it really worries me especially because when we first started dating about 2 months ago she told me that she has fainted a lot, but hasn't in over 6 months. She is currently doing this new diet which I am thinking might be contributing to this where she eats less than 800 calories a day with little to no carbohydrate consumption. She is also anemic which makes me worry even more about her health choices. She refuses to see a doctor or do any kind of lifestyle change that may result in less frequent fainting. We are supposed to go cliff diving together this weekend, and I'm becoming really afraid that she may just faint at the wrong moment and really injure herself... She is only 21, and I feel like she should not be going through these episodes, and they are really beginning to worry me and make me feel anxious...I don't want to seem like i'm nagging her, but I wish there was something I could do to help and she has currently been sick for over a week with headaches, chest pains, and congestion. she was given antibiotics, but she just hasn't been disciplined in taking them continuously... Does her breath smell sweet? Cause that can mean she's in ketosis, where the body is burning fat for energy. The brain has a preference for glucose for energy and can't process fats, but without any glucose, it'll switch to ketones. That can cause headaches and nausea. You should get her to at least eat some carbs (not sugary stuff but grains and such), it'll help her headaches a bit. I think she should at minimum eat about 1500 calories a day, *bare minimum*.
spiderowl Posted June 10, 2011 Posted June 10, 2011 She's putting her health at risk for some reason. Is she afraid of doctors? You could ask her what she thinks they would do, to see if she explains her fears. Anaemia or her diet could be responsible or she could have some other problem, like a faulty heart. Whatever the cause, it sounds like she needs help but is she willing to get it? It could be she is anorexic. It sounds like she is exercising very strict control over food, the amount she eats and the type. If so, this is not good news as she is likely to resist any attempts you make to try to get her to eat better or to see a doctor. She is actually fainting - and regularly it seems - so something's not right. Anaemia alone could do this but the diet could make it worse. Basically, your girlfriend is taking big risks and is likely to end up in hospital. I'd suggest you talk to an eating disorders helpline in confidence, to see if they think this is an eating disorder and if they can give you any advice. But, do not assume it is; she could just be going through something and thinks her diet might help. Your girlfriend is telling you about the fainting but at the same time is in denial about what might be causing it. This is putting you in an awful position. I think you are entirely justified in refusing to take her anywhere where she may risk serious injury if she faints and also in giving her an ultimatum. Tell her you are worried about her, that fainting means something's wrong and she needs to see her doctor. If she ignores all this and continues to complain of fainting, then you need to decide what to do. You could ignore the complaints and refuse to pay attention, just not taking her with you to risky places or you could insist she see a doctor or you will have to leave. Explain that her behaviour is risky and it is painful for you to watch and that you don't want to have to watch her making herself sicker. Good luck! Sounds like you'll need it.
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