tigressA Posted June 8, 2011 Posted June 8, 2011 The name of a great article I found. The author asserts that smartphones are bad for relationships because: ~They are an easy and constant distraction from a date/SO ~They make it easier to keep secrets (like inappropriate flirting/cheating) and also uncover them ~They are a facilitator for miscommunication (mostly with texting) ~They make it very easy to connect without commitment--constant texting and IMing are easily mistaken for being a substantive relationship when there's little to no face-to-face contact. Ideal for players/multi-daters ~"The Game" has changed. Waiting 3 days to call isn't what we worry over now. With texting becoming the norm there is now no new appropriate time frame to respond to a question that pretty much requires an immediate answer ("What's up?"). Additionally, certain excuses to make one seem less available have become all but useless now ("I only just saw this", "My phone was off", "I was out") because most people have their phones with them all the time ~They make failed relationships harder to get over. With so many ways of connecting being available on a handy device that is usually with someone 24/7, it's easy to FB-stalk an ex or send them a text out of loneliness Discuss. http://bounceback.com/articles_details.php?id=11&article_id=386
alexlakeman Posted June 8, 2011 Posted June 8, 2011 Interesting.. I'll have to comment more later when I get home, but it does make life easier, and if you use it while on a date, that's the user's fault..
Andy_K Posted June 8, 2011 Posted June 8, 2011 Fair points, but what does this have to do with smart phones? I'm pretty sure all mobile phones have been able to text for well over a decade now...
proactivedreamer Posted June 8, 2011 Posted June 8, 2011 I think this sort of technology has in fact changed the way people interact with one another. However, I think that has to do with the fact that we are choosing to let it change the way we interact. I feel like our cell phones are suppose to help us stay connected, but, as we see, instead of doing that it is disconnecting people. Funny, my mother initiated an argument through text just yesterday. I was so frustrated by this and I did not want to participate. I think it is so weird, in retrospect, to witness two people sitting across from each other both on their phones. It seems so impersonal and sad. I think we all have to be vigilant about the way in which we use to technology and how we let it effect our relationships.
donnamaybe Posted June 8, 2011 Posted June 8, 2011 Welllll.... It's kind of like saying it's the gun that killed the guy rather than the person who pulled the trigger.
welikeincrowds Posted June 8, 2011 Posted June 8, 2011 Welllll.... It's kind of like saying it's the gun that killed the guy rather than the person who pulled the trigger. But both the man and the gun were essential components, which combined to effect the killing -- one is not more at cause than the other because you need both to explain the murder. Without the gun, the circumstances may have been different, non-existent, or impossible. And I'm not really talking about guns, I'm talking about text messages, I don't want to start a gun law argument, you can all keep your AKs.
Thatguyintx Posted June 8, 2011 Posted June 8, 2011 After reading the article and thinking about it for a bit, I am going to have to agree overall. I work and have worked in Information Technology for 16 years and love gadgets, but have to admit the use of web and game playing on the phone have changed interactions with people. Texting has also cheapened the communication overall. Very interesting read and looking forward to other's commentary.
donnamaybe Posted June 8, 2011 Posted June 8, 2011 I have a smart phone, and I manage to be courteous when I'm with people. One can be VERY discourteous with our without a phone, smart or otherwise. You can also own or even carry a gun without killing someone. That's the point I was trying to make. The only time I take a call when I have a visitor or I'm out with someone is if it's one of my kids, and then if it's not important I tell them I'll call them back later. We have a lot of construction in our area currently, and getting home can be a drag. Recently I was able to use the navigation on my smart phone (a mini-GPS) to help me find an alternate route. I've used it also to find a business I wasn't familiar with, and gas prices as they are, I've no desire to drive around unnecessarily. I just let the navigation direct me straight to where I'm going when I'm uncertain. I LOVE my smart phone!
Cee Posted June 8, 2011 Posted June 8, 2011 After reading the article and thinking about it for a bit, I am going to have to agree overall. I work and have worked in Information Technology for 16 years and love gadgets, but have to admit the use of web and game playing on the phone have changed interactions with people. Texting has also cheapened the communication overall. Very interesting read and looking forward to other's commentary. I'd love to hear your perspective. I am amazed at how technology have been moving at a blistering pace. I remember thinking that call waiting was the best invention ever. I had no idea that the internet and smartphones were around the bend. There has been controversy with every phone invention. When call waiting was invented, then people started using the line, "Oh that's my grandma calling long distance. Gotta run." Or people use to sneak voicemails so that they didn't have to talk to a person. While communication gets easier and easier, the need for silence and distance remains.
AmericanHoney Posted June 8, 2011 Posted June 8, 2011 (edited) Dude that article was amazing and so,so true! My ex was totally dependent on his smartphone. I could never read him ever:rolleyes: I would ask him babe is everything ok?? I haven't heard from you in awhile and he would say everything is fine. This game went on for a really,really long time and eventually he stopped caring and moved on. I sometimes wonder maybe if we had used the phone things would of been better?? I could of possibly found out by the tone of his voice things were slowly fading away or I could of figured out he had another girl on the side. Texting you never know if there is someone else because like the article said it is easy to hide things and with texting so many things get lost in translation. I should say smartphones are not evil because they are handy for maps,etc but when it comes to texting it does become evil. The article should of said texting and not point the finger at smartphones because they aren't the problem texting is. Edited June 8, 2011 by AmericanHoney
Thatguyintx Posted June 8, 2011 Posted June 8, 2011 I'd love to hear your perspective. I am amazed at how technology have been moving at a blistering pace. I remember thinking that call waiting was the best invention ever. I had no idea that the internet and smartphones were around the bend. There has been controversy with every phone invention. When call waiting was invented, then people started using the line, "Oh that's my grandma calling long distance. Gotta run." Or people use to sneak voicemails so that they didn't have to talk to a person. While communication gets easier and easier, the need for silence and distance remains. Not sure I have any insight to speak of, but I know that my usage of the technology has probably sabotaged the beginnings of a relationship or two. And contributed to the death of a LTR. As a very analytical person, I can sometime lose the nuances of a statement that I have made. Other parties have construed WAY more meaning than I intended. Or I have been the one to over-analyze a statement when simple tone of voice or a chuckle would have made the point. Also, I have a job which requires constant access in case of customer outages. My phone and email have interrupted dates and special moments that really caused issues later on. One I know of, my then-SO and I were in the heat of working through an emotional issue. She was charged up and on the verge of a complete meltdown. Phone rings, email notifies me, customer down issue. I have to immediately drop into work mode and log on to begin problem resolution. Frankly, the relationship could not handle the constant interruption. Just today, this article got me thinking of cell phones when they were mounted in your car or even worse, bag phones. AH! Those were the days!
oaks Posted June 8, 2011 Posted June 8, 2011 The name of a great article I found. The author asserts that smartphones are bad for relationships because: ~They are an easy and constant distraction from a date/SO This one just requires self restraint. When my date arrives I turn my phone off or silent and put it away, and now it doesn't distract me or her. Hopefully she'll do the same.
motive2002 Posted June 9, 2011 Posted June 9, 2011 I feel old saying this but... THE YOUNGER GENERATION! When's the last time you saw a teenager without them being preoccupied with either their cell-phone or iPod? Not only is it making communication between people a whole lot different, but it's also isolating people at the same time. No wonder younger people are getting more and more socially awkward. And let's not forget about the fact that whatever you say can be broadcast immediately to anyone who might know you. Don't ever write something you wouldn't want the whole world to see... Oh and text messaging.. my god.. people say things they would otherwise be too bashful to say over the phone or in person. "Sexting" comes to mind. Also, the inability to interpret mood, sarcasm etc.
johan Posted June 9, 2011 Posted June 9, 2011 Sometimes the smartphone is smarter and more interesting than its owner.
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