kleenex123 Posted June 8, 2011 Posted June 8, 2011 He holds my past against me. The past was that i've went clubbing once(my only once) and got drunk. And on the way out, two of my boy friends held me to stand up because i tripped and fell down. Therefore there were two pictures, one of which, a pic which looked like i was enjoying myself, dancing; and the other one, of the two boys holding me up - my arms on their shoulder and their hands round my waist. But it was merely helping me to stand up. It isn't anything to do with horniness. We're traditional asians and we don't do physical contacts with opposite sex. He feels that i've broken his trust. But i did not cheat on him or anything. He has been holding that against me since last year. For details of the story it's here : http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t281507/ We're in a long distance relationship now he's studying in US and next year i'm going to go over for him. Pursue tertiary education there. Should i? I'm so afraid that by then he can't get over it still and holds it against me. I feel that if he doesn't get over it then it's the end of the relationship.. I really need advices. THanks!
fltc Posted June 8, 2011 Posted June 8, 2011 Sorry, no help here. As you were told in your previous thread, it's his issue and he's the one that has to deal with it. I agree, if he can't the relationship should end but, again, it's his decision.
coolheadal Posted June 9, 2011 Posted June 9, 2011 Tough call, but you can't change his heart and feelings. I know if I was him I would be feeling the same. Some guys can look the other way and some can't.
willowthewisp Posted June 9, 2011 Posted June 9, 2011 (edited) Some guys can look the other way from what Cool? This girl hasn't done anything wrong? Maybe this is a cultural thing, but from your other thread (admitidely I have not read all of it, I'm sorry I only had a few miniutes) it seems your BF is a bit controlling, the clevage thing in particular stands out. He is happy to ask you out, be your BF comment on your FB that the picture is gorgeous, but as soon as you are in a relationship with him he starts saying to cover up and telling you you are bad and accusing you of things you haven't done. In a Western relationship that is called being controlling and abusive, whilst he has a right to say he was unhappy about you asking the male friend to sleep on the bed, you are young and you did not think, it was perfectly innocent and since then (a year) your BF has decided to stay your BF and you two have lost your virginity together. Your BF should not, therefore, still be going on about things that are in the past and dealt with, if he was really that bothered he should have ended things with you then, not still be holding it over you as a way to control you now. Like I said perhaps this is a cultural thing, but if I were you hunny I would tell your BF you will not be treated like this, either he accepts you as you are and TRUSTS what you say or the you don't see any future together with him. Obviously say it in a more understanding way. That is what I would do but like I said maybe it is more difficult in your culture? Edited June 9, 2011 by willowthewisp
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