JHS Posted June 7, 2011 Posted June 7, 2011 (edited) Here's a survey: If someone you didn't know contacted you saying that he/she was an ex GF/BF of someone you are now dating or thinking about dating and that person is a psycho/liar/etc and you should stay away, what would you do? Would you: A) Ignore B) Think that the person really is a psycho C) Think that the ex (i.e., the person sending you the e-mail) is a psycho D) Fwd to or tell the person E) Other Thoughts? Has this ever happened? Edited June 7, 2011 by JHS
Mcnulty Posted June 7, 2011 Posted June 7, 2011 Ignore...that door closed for them, yours has just opened.
Author JHS Posted June 9, 2011 Author Posted June 9, 2011 Ignore...that door closed for them, yours has just opened. Thanks. But I was more trying to figure out how people would respond to such a communication, rather than how I should handle it.
Art_Critic Posted June 9, 2011 Posted June 9, 2011 C & A and I would keep my eyes open for a touch of B.. While not always but many times where there is smoke there is fire... But I certainly wouldn't give that person more weight than the person I was seeing or myself...
Ghosst Posted June 9, 2011 Posted June 9, 2011 I would be curious about it. I would ask the person I was now dating about the situation. People who repeatedly have stalkers generally have communication issues.
dng Posted June 9, 2011 Posted June 9, 2011 Thoughts? Has this ever happened? Never happened, but I would stay NC with the stalker and confront the main character. Any sign of avoidance, blame shifting or deflection of the conversation to sex or to me would prove the stalker right. In any case, this wouldnt bode well. Remember what everyone on LS says "he/she did it to them, they will do it to you, they did it to you, dont take them back, they'll do it again, etc", well...
Eeyore79 Posted June 9, 2011 Posted June 9, 2011 I would think that the ex was a nutter. Nobody in their right mind pesters an ex's new partner; most normal people are capable of letting a relationship go and allowing their ex's new partner to find things out for themselves. I'd probably also forward the email to my partner and ask them to explain, and remain alert for any odd behavior. Still, my main thought would be that the ex is a fruit loop.
Trovador Posted June 9, 2011 Posted June 9, 2011 I'd tend to B or at least to give some weight to the thought... if a person took pains to hand me some info, it's must be because said info it's important, or at the very least, he thinks it is... I'd never do that myself (spill the beans about my ex), but if her current bf asked me about her, I'd tell him everything... the good and the bad...
Elisa89 Posted June 9, 2011 Posted June 9, 2011 The ex of the guy I was seeing used to call me whenever she thought I could possibly be with him. When I actually was with him, I made him answer the call, when not, I ignored. She's been very persistent though, she's still calling me and I haven't seen the guy in almost three weeks. So in general, I would ignore the contact from the ex, but definitely confront the person I'm dating/seeing.
Author JHS Posted June 9, 2011 Author Posted June 9, 2011 Thank you all. Am interested in more responses. This happened to me in real life - my ex decided to contact a CLIENT of mine through FB. (Longish story but am happy to share the details.) The client didn't think to fwd the message to me on her own until I figured out that she was contacted. Now I am a little fearful that it might happen again - with someone new that I am interested in. Hard to thwart the unknown (I realize that sounds a little paranoid) so my comfort comes from hoping that if it happens, that person will at least give me a chance to sort of know about it and address it. The person who did it does indeed have some issues.
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