invalidteratoma Posted June 7, 2011 Posted June 7, 2011 If you have the patience to read this.. I appreciate it and any help you can give me. It's not THAT long. So basically, I met this girl last semester, and she turned out to be everything I could ever ask for in a girl. She has some difficulties though. She is OCD, and in her words it is torture for her to go home from college for the summer, due to her OCD, which has all stemmed from a reason at home. She hasn't been talking to me much, which concerns me.. but every time she texts me, which is usually every 4 or 5 days, she is asking me how I'm doing, and she recently told me she misses me. I feel I'm reading WAY too much into the situation, but for some reason it's just been so difficult for me to accept she probably just needs time to figure herself out. She's told me we were meant to meet, but at the time(a month ago) when she told me this she said just not right now is she ready for me. She's incredibly independent and could land any guy she wanted to on a moments notice but for some reason found comfort in me. A month ago we had an argument that lead to me ending up saying typical too much too fast things(learned my mistake). I think made her feel stripped of her independence, but she came back with the whole "I am a firm believer everything happens for a reason, and I believe we were meant to meet". She's said its something in my nature that she can't explain that makes her feel comfortable with me. Before we left for home for the semester(she lives probably 6 hours away), she snuck a sweatshirt of mine home, and we left on a good note, but not in the way we were all semester. I've been in love before, and I've never fell so hard, and felt so comfortable and right with a girl, and she apparently feels the same way about me. But this summer, the excessively limited contact, it's confusing me. I understand she's dealing with a whole load of bull at home, and she's independent and wants to solve her problems on her own.. but why does that stop her from being able to talk with me as much as we did before? There is no other guy in the picture. She's convince she's most likely gonna end up alone, as ex's have told her in the past, but I dont have a problem with her problems, I just want her to find comfort in me, cuz we're both so happy when things are like that.. and i've never felt so rewarded and been so happy with someone. She's told me she's gonna come visit me, which most likely will be in a month.. but i suppose I'm just so confused as to why she's not talking with me now. Will things be ok, or is this leading to her letting go and proving to herself she's better off alone? And how should/can I prove to her I'm someone she can trust, like she believed before things started to go in limbo?
SxB Posted June 7, 2011 Posted June 7, 2011 If you have the patience to read this.. I appreciate it and any help you can give me. It's not THAT long. So basically, I met this girl last semester, and she turned out to be everything I could ever ask for in a girl. She has some difficulties though. She is OCD, and in her words it is torture for her to go home from college for the summer, due to her OCD, which has all stemmed from a reason at home. She hasn't been talking to me much, which concerns me.. but every time she texts me, which is usually every 4 or 5 days, she is asking me how I'm doing, and she recently told me she misses me. I feel I'm reading WAY too much into the situation, but for some reason it's just been so difficult for me to accept she probably just needs time to figure herself out. She's told me we were meant to meet, but at the time(a month ago) when she told me this she said just not right now is she ready for me. She's incredibly independent and could land any guy she wanted to on a moments notice but for some reason found comfort in me. A month ago we had an argument that lead to me ending up saying typical too much too fast things(learned my mistake). I think made her feel stripped of her independence, but she came back with the whole "I am a firm believer everything happens for a reason, and I believe we were meant to meet". She's said its something in my nature that she can't explain that makes her feel comfortable with me. Before we left for home for the semester(she lives probably 6 hours away), she snuck a sweatshirt of mine home, and we left on a good note, but not in the way we were all semester. I've been in love before, and I've never fell so hard, and felt so comfortable and right with a girl, and she apparently feels the same way about me. But this summer, the excessively limited contact, it's confusing me. I understand she's dealing with a whole load of bull at home, and she's independent and wants to solve her problems on her own.. but why does that stop her from being able to talk with me as much as we did before? There is no other guy in the picture. She's convince she's most likely gonna end up alone, as ex's have told her in the past, but I dont have a problem with her problems, I just want her to find comfort in me, cuz we're both so happy when things are like that.. and i've never felt so rewarded and been so happy with someone. She's told me she's gonna come visit me, which most likely will be in a month.. but i suppose I'm just so confused as to why she's not talking with me now. Will things be ok, or is this leading to her letting go and proving to herself she's better off alone? And how should/can I prove to her I'm someone she can trust, like she believed before things started to go in limbo? "It's not THAT long." It's not that long but it's an eye gauging block of f*ucking text that's like trying to hike through the Appalachian Mountains trying to read it, I lost my place only like 10 times, I need a compass. And I think also I saw 2 Black Bears and 1 Mountain Lion. Anyway about your question IF I read your post correctly: By Kimberly Pruitt June 9, 2009 | Issue 45•24 Kimberly Pruitt I really like you. I do. You're so nice, and sweet, and you listen to all my problems and respond with the appropriate compliments. But, well, I don't really see a relationship in our future. It would be terrible if we let sex destroy this great friendship we have where I get everything I want and you get nothing you want. Don't you think? I knew you would understand. You always do. We're so perfect as friends, you know? I can tell you anything, and you know you can always come to me anytime you need to hear me bitch about work or how ugly I feel. You wouldn't want to ruin a friendship like that just so you could be my boyfriend, and have me look at you with desire and longing in my eyes, if only once—would you? Of course not. Well, if we started dating, it would only complicate this wonderful setup I've got going here. It's just…you're like my best friend, and I would hate for something you desperately want to change that. I mean, sure, we could go on some dates, maybe mess around a little and finally validate the six years you've spent languishing in this platonic nightmare, but then what? How could we ever go back to the way we were, where I take advantage of your clear attraction to me so I can have someone at my beck and call? That part of our friendship means so much to me. No. We are just destined to be really, really good friends who only hang out when I don't have a boyfriend, but still need male attention to boost my fragile and all-consuming ego. Anything can happen once you bring romance in. Think about how awful my last relationship was at the end, remember? The guy I'd call you crying about at 3 because he wouldn't answer my texts? The guy I met at the birthday party you threw me? I had insanely passionate sex with him for four months and now we don't even talk anymore. God, I would die if something like that happened to us. Plus, ick, can you even imagine getting naked in front of each other? I've known you so long, you're more like a brother that I've drunkenly made out with twice and never mentioned again. It'd be way too weird. And if we did, then whenever you'd come shopping with me, or go to one of my performances or charity events, or take me for ice cream when I've had a bad day at work, you'd be looking at me like, "I've seen her breasts." God, I can't think of anything more awkward that that. Oh, before I forget, my mom says hi. Anyway, you would totally hate me as your girlfriend. I'd be all needy and dramatic and slowly growing to love you. If I was your girlfriend, I would never be able to tell you all about the other ******* guys I date and pretend I don't see how much it crushes you. Let's never lose that. That's what makes us us. Don't worry. You're so funny and smart and amazing, any girl but me would be lucky to date you. You'll find someone, I know it. And when you do, I'll be right by your side to suddenly become all flirty and affectionate with you in front of her, until she grows jealous and won't believe it when you say we're just friends. But when she dumps you, that's just what we'll be. Best friends. Friends forever.
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