Author kleenex123 Posted June 8, 2011 Author Posted June 8, 2011 John, he did, too. Those were all long before we got this close. He took revenge on the clubbing incident by going out with his classmates & took pictures, with his hands round their waists. Two girls, in his "embrace". And there was also once when he & his classmate for 8 years, apparently a girl who allows physical contacts and makes out with random guys, he drove this girl up to a resort. Only two of them in the car. Others took the bus. The reason he drove was that only the two of them weren't allowed to stay there. But still, he should've known better that i'd be disturbed too. But i've forgiven & forgotten those. And i honestly didn't see the point of taking revenge. Love really isn't about that..
Untouchable_Fire Posted June 8, 2011 Posted June 8, 2011 John, he did, too. Those were all long before we got this close. He took revenge on the clubbing incident by going out with his classmates & took pictures, with his hands round their waists. Two girls, in his "embrace". And there was also once when he & his classmate for 8 years, apparently a girl who allows physical contacts and makes out with random guys, he drove this girl up to a resort. Only two of them in the car. Others took the bus. The reason he drove was that only the two of them weren't allowed to stay there. But still, he should've known better that i'd be disturbed too. But i've forgiven & forgotten those. And i honestly didn't see the point of taking revenge. Love really isn't about that.. Kleenex... Ignore the turds who are just giving you cookie cutter advice. Your relationship isn't necessarily toast. Here is the deal... Your BF has low self esteem and it is causing him to be insecure. Additionally he literally loves you so much these incidences just drive him crazy. Guys develop thicker skin to this kind of stuff over time. We are naturally VERY territorial when it comes to our women. This manifests itself in many different ways... especially when we are young. Don't just throw away something awesome, just because of some youthful insecurity. That said... this is mostly his issue. I assume you have apologized and explained these situations to his satisfaction, so it's no longer a trust issue. Right? He needs to get himself to the point where these incidents feel meaningless to him. I honestly believe that it will come in time... so long as he TRUSTS YOU! Also... I highly applaud you not giving up! It shows great character. Keep in mind that people change over time and you two need to communicate better to grow together and not apart. When in groups, make sure to provide him a good amount of attention. If you ignore him for another guy then your priorities are way off kilter. That type of behavior would make me seriously reconsider you as a long term partner. However... at 17 you both need to be flexible towards minor mistakes. It seems you have that flexibility much more than him. I had 2 friends in highschool that were so crazy jealous/insecure that they couldn't function in a relationship. Today they have both been happily married for 10+ years and no longer struggle with that. One helped invent Hulu.com and the other works for Intel. Age, experience, and success just increased their self confidence to a point where the insecurity went away. I applaud you for your beliefs and what you are trying to do! I hope this helps!
Author kleenex123 Posted June 8, 2011 Author Posted June 8, 2011 untouchable_fire please tell me that you're still here. ;( now, we're on it again. he said that the trust is broken. he's been saying that whenever he thinks of those pictures, he feels all the negative connotations i can think of. he said that he doesn't mean he wants to leave me, but if i want him to, he will, since he was never good enough for me. and he's been to a psychiatrist cause they said that he has depression. he said he'll visit the doctor later and kept calling and texting. what do i do now? ;(
Author kleenex123 Posted June 8, 2011 Author Posted June 8, 2011 But i really did nothing else besides going and drinking. And i truly regretted it already and it won't repeat again. He keeps banging on the point that his pasts were before we met but mine was when we had something on. But i didn't even cheat on him or any sort.
P&R Posted June 8, 2011 Posted June 8, 2011 But i really did nothing else besides going and drinking. And i truly regretted it already and it won't repeat again. He keeps banging on the point that his pasts were before we met but mine was when we had something on. But i didn't even cheat on him or any sort. I saw your post in the LDR forum... You said he went back to his country to study but I didn't know you were still in a LDR. He sounds like a naturally insecure person and that will only be amplified by distance. I know since I was in a LDR for 4 years. What country does he live in?
Author kleenex123 Posted June 8, 2011 Author Posted June 8, 2011 I saw your post in the LDR forum... You said he went back to his country to study but I didn't know you were still in a LDR. He sounds like a naturally insecure person and that will only be amplified by distance. I know since I was in a LDR for 4 years. What country does he live in? he lives in the US at the moment. i'm planning to go over soon right after i finish high school. i'm really helpless. what can i do? he said that he can't get over the filthy images in his mind. to be frank, i agree that the pictures weren't nice. they were terrible, indeed. but pictures last for one second. and i don't know why doesn't he believe me on that. i'm not the type of girls who would allow physical contacts. he was my first. and i don't know what else can i do. because i really hadn't cheat on him or not. i will never do that. but he just kept saying that. the trust is gone. what should i do now? end it? And he's like, "you're a girl, why can't you care about your reputation? Even if you can't, do care about mine alright?" and he said, "probably i don't deserve you. i don't love you enough, in return for your love you have for me. i'm not saying that i want to leave. but if you want me to, i'm happy to do so, since, i was never good enough for you.. let me know if you want me to do so alright? love you." i really don't know what else can i do. It's been haunting us for more than half a year. This is totally tormenting. I won't mind if the condition is gradually improving, but it isn't. It seems like he choose to brood over the past. I don't know what does he want. I stopped replying but he kept calling and texting and asked if i'm alright and said that he loves me and what not. I strongly believe that he does love me a lot a lot but this incident just haunts him too badly. But point is i really hadn't do anything which had betray him. We've made love with each other, lost our virginity to each other. He too had a past which was much worse before he met me but he just kept banging on the point that clubbing incident was after we had something on. But i really didn't cheat on him or betray him. I feel that i'm out of ways to save this relationship. There'll always be stg between us. I'm really helpless. However, if i broke up with him i won't get another bf another as we've made love. I'd be "contaminated" - if we broke up. I can't accept making love with two persons. So i just want this relationship to work out. I don't know what can i do. Ignore him for a few days to think about it? I don't know.. This isn't any puppy love thing we're both really really serious. He just can't bear to think of the "filthy" picture. sorry that i'm spamming posts everywhere. i'm literally going crazy....
Ouroboros Posted June 8, 2011 Posted June 8, 2011 I am sure you know what you are doing and best of luck to you.
Author kleenex123 Posted June 8, 2011 Author Posted June 8, 2011 Ouroboros, if it were you, what would you do? If you desperately don't wanna lose this man. He loves you too. He's just bothered by the filthy images. And i'd really wanna know what should i do now, to help him & make him not disturbed anymore.
P&R Posted June 8, 2011 Posted June 8, 2011 Please... for your own good cut the marriage talk. If you're serious about your Christian beliefs then you should know that the Bible looks down on divorce. I know this because I, myself used to be Christian. These verses I'm about to post essentially tell you that you only get one shot at marriage, except in the case of cheating. Can you go celibate for the rest of your life if your marriage with him fails and he doesn't cheat on you, or will you cast aside your beliefs and live in sin? Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her. And if a woman divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery. - Mark 10:11-12 Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge. Hebrews 13:4 And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery. Matthew 19:9 Now... tell me, if this is how your boyfriend is going to be... will you be able to live with it? He has shown that he is immature, and insecure. I know this because his first reaction when he saw your clubbing photo's was to take revenge. In a healthy relationship your partner wouldn't look to project his insecurities onto you. Will you truely be happy living with such a person? I can tell you right now that you won't judging by the tone that you are writing in.
Author kleenex123 Posted June 8, 2011 Author Posted June 8, 2011 But wouldn't it be the same? I've committed fornication if i don't marry him. And if i do, fornication isn't present because Exodus 22:16-17 gives instruction on what to do if an unmarried, unengaged man has consensual sex with an unmarried, unengaged woman: "If a man seduces (implies consent) a virgin (or a woman of marriageable age) who is not pledged to be married, and sleeps with her, he must pay the bride-price (or marriage present) and she shall be his wife" Isn't it so? :S And we truly truly love each other..
Ouroboros Posted June 8, 2011 Posted June 8, 2011 There is nothing we can do to change your mind about continuing a relationship with him and there is nothing you can do to make him no longer feel what he feels.
P&R Posted June 8, 2011 Posted June 8, 2011 But wouldn't it be the same? I've committed fornication if i don't marry him. And if i do, fornication isn't present because Exodus 22:16-17 gives instruction on what to do if an unmarried, unengaged man has consensual sex with an unmarried, unengaged woman: "If a man seduces (implies consent) a virgin (or a woman of marriageable age) who is not pledged to be married, and sleeps with her, he must pay the bride-price (or marriage present) and she shall be his wife" Isn't it so? :S And we truly truly love each other.. [FONT=Arial][sIZE=-1][COLOR=#0000b7]"But if ... evidences of virginity are not found for the young woman, then they shall bring out the young woman to the door of her father's house, and the men of her city shall stone her to death with stones..." [/COLOR][/sIZE][/FONT][FONT=Arial][sIZE=-1][COLOR=#060606](Deuteronomy 22:20,21)[/COLOR][/sIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][COLOR=#060606][/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][COLOR=#060606]Does this mean you should be stoned? [/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][COLOR=#060606][/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Arial][COLOR=#060606][/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][COLOR=#060606]An Ouroborus said... It looks like you have already made up your mind. [/COLOR][/FONT]
Author kleenex123 Posted June 8, 2011 Author Posted June 8, 2011 There is nothing we can do to change your mind about continuing a relationship with him and there is nothing you can do to make him no longer feel what he feels. thanks, i know you're saying this for my own good. just let me give it another try, alright? the end of this year when he's back, we have 3 months together in the same city. i'll sort it out with him by then and if he can't stop feeling that way, i'll leave him, and not go over to US. thank you so much for your effort and time.
P&R Posted June 8, 2011 Posted June 8, 2011 "But if ... evidences of virginity are not found for the young woman, then they shall bring out the young woman to the door of her father's house, and the men of her city shall stone her to death with stones..." Does this mean you should be stoned?! Anyways it looks like you have already made up your mind. Good luck. (first post was jacked up due to font colors)
Author kleenex123 Posted June 8, 2011 Author Posted June 8, 2011 [FONT=Arial][sIZE=-1][COLOR=#0000b7]"But if ... evidences of virginity are not found for the young woman, then they shall bring out the young woman to the door of her father's house, and the men of her city shall stone her to death with stones..." [/COLOR][/sIZE][/FONT][FONT=Arial][sIZE=-1][COLOR=#060606](Deuteronomy 22:20,21)[/COLOR][/sIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][COLOR=#060606][/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][COLOR=#060606]Does this mean you should be stoned? [/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][COLOR=#060606][/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Arial][COLOR=#060606][/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][COLOR=#060606]An Ouroborus said... It looks like you have already made up your mind. [/COLOR][/FONT] million appreciations to you too, P&R. thanks so much for the effort and time on my thread. i guess, i'll just wait until he's back? i'll give it one last try?
eerie_reverie Posted June 8, 2011 Posted June 8, 2011 These are NOT your issues. Can you imagine the future with someone like him? How will you go to school and have a job, where you have to interact with other guys? He is so insecure he is going to find fault with everything you do.
Author kleenex123 Posted June 8, 2011 Author Posted June 8, 2011 he just told me a story about his schoolmates raping girls at parties after the girls are wasted and here's our conversation. him--> alright dear. its fine. dw thats the reason why im like so harsh and sensitive on you not going to these sort of places? its because ive heard so much and seen so much tahts why i dont want you to end up like those victims. so innocent. yes, your reason might be for exposure... but there might be guys there who aren't there for exposure. they want to get laid. thats their motive. thats why i was so angry when you said you got drunk or wasted or whatever your condition is. you say that no one touched you that night and stuff, ok i trust you. and i know you were there with a bunch of friends, and you were constantly with them, never left them.. but its just... i dont know? haha. i just dont wanna see my own girlfriend ending up like those innocent girls who go there just for leisure or fun. and ended up like that. love you. *as i was typing* baby, dont need to type so long. i dont think it'll help much anyway. its been bugging me for like what, more than half a year already. if it was meant to be forgotten, i'd have forgotten it long ago. me--> yeap i understand this. that's why i'll never ever go again, trust me on this. i'm sorry for going, truly am. if i knew you didn't want me to go, i wouldn't have gone. i care about what you think, a lot. since day 1 when you told me that you didn't like me to expose anything(be it intentional or unintentional), i've became really really cautious and alert bout it and i've considered like ten times before wearing anything already. and since day 1 when you told me you feel neglected that i text(with girls) when we're together, i've stopped texting her whenever i'm with you. minor stuffs like that, but these do show that i do care right? i really do care a lot baby. i'm really thankful to God that i have someone who cares so much for me, baby. i just hope you understand that we weren't as close that time and i didn't really know what's on your mind. if only i knew, i'd avoided everything which would make you disturbed, even by a tiny. i don't want that. i was really blunt & insensitive, and as i've told you before, i was never actually in a relationship with somebody and i don't know the correct way to treat my boyfriend right. no doubt they have gave you a number of 30 of guys who they think used to have something on with me. but the truth is, there wasn't. i could tell you the truth that i was merely friends with all of them. they were some of them who were after me but i've made it very clear that we're only friends. out of the thirty, i wouldn't hide this truth from you, the only two persons who i've liked were A & B. and with the both of them, our communication is only through texting and msn. that's why, i really didn't know how to consider all those elements that i have to care about someone's feeligns and stuffs. all i knew is that i love you a lot a lot a lot but i didn't know a relationship isn't just about love. there were too many elements which i've failed to consider, just because i was unexperienced. i know that doesn't give me an excuse to be insensitive, but i don't know either. i really didn't mean to let you down in any sense, in any where. i'm sorry that i haven't been perfect, but i really have been loving you with my best. and i'm trying to be the perfect one to you. i'm really trying very very hard, baby. so, what does this imply? :S. sighs. he is insecure & protective but he has really good intentions and just doesn't want me to get hurt.
Ouroboros Posted June 8, 2011 Posted June 8, 2011 thanks, i know you're saying this for my own good. just let me give it another try, alright? the end of this year when he's back, we have 3 months together in the same city. i'll sort it out with him by then and if he can't stop feeling that way, i'll leave him, and not go over to US. thank you so much for your effort and time. Try it as many times and as long as you want. There is the chance I could be wrong. You'll only be happy by going after what you want no matter how miserable it makes you. Having someone else dictate your life to you and denying yourself will make you as upset.
Author kleenex123 Posted June 8, 2011 Author Posted June 8, 2011 he replied this. alright dear. just wished that none of these ever happened. thought you were smart enough to be sensitive enough to know not to go, because i've told you about my past, and you know how much i regretted it. i thought you'd treat that as a living example, to learn from and not to go to those type of places. fair enough, you know why i didn't stop you from going? for three reasons: firstly, i thought you were smart enough not to go, as ive mentioned earlier, i thought you were intelligent and rational enough to not go. secondly, fair enough, you went... i was disapppointed to be honest. when i learnt that you wanted to go. fair enough, you went.. and i trusted you that you wouldn't drink. you never mentioned to me before that you drink. so, i just accepted the fact that you went and not drink. dont tell me there was nothing else to drink there. you can choose not to drink. and you told me you were forced to dirnk and forced to go. i wont buy that ok? part of you, definitely wants to go. if not, you wont willingly follow them there. besdies, they even stayed at yr house the night after clubbing. so yea. hospitaliity. and lastly, if you did drink, i thought you'd know your boundaries and everything. i thought you'd know your limits to when to stop drinking. and whats worse is, you exaggerated the drunk-ness. you acted hyper intentionally. i dont see the reason why for. i don't know how and when i'm gonna forget about this. oh btw, i've seen picts of you and the group at the club on facebook. think it was posted by your friend. not sure if its still around. just saying. love you. sorry that im appearing offline because i cant hold back my tears. sorry that im crying now. you say you're hurt whenever i insult you and stuff.. but i'm equally as hurt. cant hold back my tears any longer. it breaks my heart to see these things done by you.. btw, sorry for bringing up the things which i heard myself, and get disturbed after that.. sorry. im terribly sorry. its not that i want too as well. when im not happy, you're not happy as well. and i dont believe that our relationship is transparent as we say it is.. i'm not doubting. but i believe, some things are made up.. not all. but some. just to make it sound better.. love you. i really don't know what else can i do anymore... i didn't reply him.......
BetheButterfly Posted June 8, 2011 Posted June 8, 2011 he replied this. alright dear. just wished that none of these ever happened. thought you were smart enough to be sensitive enough to know not to go, because i've told you about my past, and you know how much i regretted it. i thought you'd treat that as a living example, to learn from and not to go to those type of places. fair enough, you know why i didn't stop you from going? for three reasons: firstly, i thought you were smart enough not to go, as ive mentioned earlier, i thought you were intelligent and rational enough to not go. secondly, fair enough, you went... i was disapppointed to be honest. when i learnt that you wanted to go. fair enough, you went.. and i trusted you that you wouldn't drink. you never mentioned to me before that you drink. so, i just accepted the fact that you went and not drink. dont tell me there was nothing else to drink there. you can choose not to drink. and you told me you were forced to dirnk and forced to go. i wont buy that ok? part of you, definitely wants to go. if not, you wont willingly follow them there. besdies, they even stayed at yr house the night after clubbing. so yea. hospitaliity. and lastly, if you did drink, i thought you'd know your boundaries and everything. i thought you'd know your limits to when to stop drinking. and whats worse is, you exaggerated the drunk-ness. you acted hyper intentionally. i dont see the reason why for. i don't know how and when i'm gonna forget about this. oh btw, i've seen picts of you and the group at the club on facebook. think it was posted by your friend. not sure if its still around. just saying. love you. sorry that im appearing offline because i cant hold back my tears. sorry that im crying now. you say you're hurt whenever i insult you and stuff.. but i'm equally as hurt. cant hold back my tears any longer. it breaks my heart to see these things done by you.. btw, sorry for bringing up the things which i heard myself, and get disturbed after that.. sorry. im terribly sorry. its not that i want too as well. when im not happy, you're not happy as well. and i dont believe that our relationship is transparent as we say it is.. i'm not doubting. but i believe, some things are made up.. not all. but some. just to make it sound better.. love you. i really don't know what else can i do anymore... i didn't reply him....... If I were you, I would reply to him something like this: "God has forgiven me. God, who forgives the sins all of all who ask and truly mean it, has washed me clean. I have already told you I am sorry and I'm not going back to do that, not because of you, but because I personally do not want to. You have 2 choices. You can just give this matter over to God and let it go, and love me and enjoy my love and be at peace together, or you can not forgive me and keep letting this past that God has forgiven me for eat away at your heart and let bitterness and fear and distaste color every thought of yours towards me, and we will no longer be a couple. What choice are you wanting to take? If you need time to pray about it and think about what it is you truly want, and if you do truly love me and forgive me, like God does, then I will give you time."
BetheButterfly Posted June 8, 2011 Posted June 8, 2011 (edited) But wouldn't it be the same? I've committed fornication if i don't marry him. And if i do, fornication isn't present because Exodus 22:16-17 gives instruction on what to do if an unmarried, unengaged man has consensual sex with an unmarried, unengaged woman: "If a man seduces (implies consent) a virgin (or a woman of marriageable age) who is not pledged to be married, and sleeps with her, he must pay the bride-price (or marriage present) and she shall be his wife" Isn't it so? :S And we truly truly love each other.. First of all, Exodus 22 is for the Israelite people of long time ago, from the time of Moses. Many Jewish people of today continue to follow the Law of Moses, though they consider each and every case and make sure to understand the heart of the Law. The Law is more than just commands, and people obeying the Law are to love God with all their heart, mind, soul and love others. As Jesus says, loving God and loving others are what the Law is all about. The Law's purpose is to protect people from harm and to lead them to God. The Law you quoted is not to you, in that you are not an Israelite girl who this happened to. I don't know if you remember another part of the Law of Moses, but Joseph could have had Mary publicly disgraced if he wanted to, before he understood concerning Jesus. However, Joseph was a good and righteous man, and did not want to disgrace her. That's one thing that's so important about the Law... is the heart. Matthew 1 (NIV) " 18 This is how the birth of Jesus the Messiah came about[d]: His mother Mary was pledged to be married to Joseph, but before they came together, she was found to be pregnant through the Holy Spirit. 19 Because Joseph her husband was faithful to the law, and yet[e] did not want to expose her to public disgrace, he had in mind to divorce her quietly. 20 But after he had considered this, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, “Joseph son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary home as your wife, because what is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. 21 She will give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus,[f] because he will save his people from their sins.” About fornication, you had sex before getting married. A few reasons God wants you to wait until after marriage are the following: 1. Sex is a strong connection and bonds the couple. If you have sex before marriage, then you have created the most intimate bond people have with each other. Many women especially, who are considered the heart of the home, feel this intense connection more than some men do. Sadly, in many cultures of today, sex is just seen as a lustful sport, with both women and men being toys. Sadly, the strong connection that supersedes physical is not understood by many people today, which is why some people go from one person to another, throwing a person away when they are tired of him/her. God did not make sex though to be like that, but rather, a uniting experience for a couple for life. 2. Babies, as you know, are a gift from God that sex can bring. It is interesting how God made sex to be the method of reproduction for the great responsibility of having a child and taking care of a child. When a couple waits until after marriage to have sex, the family commitment is in place. It is easier for a father and a mother (since both are needed to "make" a baby) to raise a child than just one parent. The father and mother should be a team, a unit that raises the child together. This is God's ideal. Though sadly through difficult circumstances, many times this doesn't happen. It is hard yet doable for single mothers or single fathers to raise their young. A happily married, loving couple taking care of their kid(s) together is the ideal if possible. About having sex before marriage, since you take your beliefs seriously, just ask God to forgive you. God knows your heart. God loves you and forgives you and He doesn't want you to live your life in shame. You don't have to marry this man in order for God to forgive you. If you've asked Him, then God has already forgiven you. You do not have to work hard to try to make this man forgive you for whatever he is holding against you so he will marry you. No. Jesus says to come to him all who are weary and heavy-laden. He will give you rest. Matthew 11 (NIV) 28 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." Peter, an apostle of Jesus, says 1 Peter 5 (NIV) " 6 Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. 7 Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you." Edited June 8, 2011 by BetheButterfly
sally4sara Posted June 8, 2011 Posted June 8, 2011 I do not believe in your god but I do know your dogma. Bethebutterfly speaks true in that your scripture says your god will gladly forgive all. You say you believe the words of your religion. If you really do feel you did something wrong, you know to ask forgiveness is to receive forgiveness. Your god will not hold it over your head and speak down to you, harass you for what he has already forgiven to further make you feel bad. And you know to believe your god is greater than all so why do you put up with treatment your own god would not put you through just to be with someone lesser than your god? Does your BF know something your god does not? Is your BF's judgement more correct than your god's? Does your BF have some moral authority above that of your god? If you are to want to be with this boy, do you not want him to believe in your god as well and walk that path through life with you? How can he if he intends to walk with you thinking he knows better than your god's judgement and forgiveness?
BetheButterfly Posted June 8, 2011 Posted June 8, 2011 You say you believe the words of your religion. If you really do feel you did something wrong, you know to ask forgiveness is to receive forgiveness. Your god will not hold it over your head and speak down to you, harass you for what he has already forgiven to further make you feel bad. And you know to believe your god is greater than all so why do you put up with treatment your own god would not put you through just to be with someone lesser than your god? Does your BF know something your god does not? Is your BF's judgement more correct than your god's? Does your BF have some moral authority above that of your god? If you are to want to be with this boy, do you not want him to believe in your god as well and walk that path through life with you? How can he if he intends to walk with you thinking he knows better than your god's judgement and forgiveness? True. Very powerful words Sally4sara. Profound meaning
Author kleenex123 Posted June 8, 2011 Author Posted June 8, 2011 Thanks guys, for spending time reading my story and actually putting in efforts to reply & give me advices. You guys were right. He kept banging on the point saying that i've ruined his trust, in fact, i did not. There weren't any trust to start with. We've sorted things out. I've told him the truth, that i feel that he was never ever able to trust me since the start. And i've explained to him my family's upbringing was that we're educated to be really particular about physical contacts since we're Christians. He was the first person i've had physical contacts with. I could stand in a crowd of sluts and watch them make out with random guys/their boyfriends and i wouldn't join them. Because i find it filthy to have physical contact with anyone besides the person whom you're prepared to spend your whole life with. After tonight's conversation, he finally realized that he hasn't trusted me since the start. Anyway, i can't blame him. Because he was brought up in a school which claims to be more "westernized", and the students there do boobs-groping & lap-dances everyday. He feels that all girls are stereotyped to be like that. Besides, his first impression of me was from my so-called best friend, who was materialistic and wanted to have him as her bf because his family is very well-off. She insulted me and badmouthed me and made up stories which made me sound like a girl, desperate for guys. Guess all these had not stop us from getting together. It just triggered the trust issue. Regardless, we're getting it right back on track now. I've told him that if he can't trust me & my personalities, then maybe he should reconsider about our plans of getting our engagement ring. He said that he'll work on the trust issue. And i've told him to have a flash back bout every single expression of mine when he took away my first kiss and what not, saying that he'll never ever find those reactions on me if it wasn't me first. He understood and he felt extremely guilty. He asked me to dump him, thinking that he doesn't deserve me. But i've told him that this realization isn't too late yet. So yeah, things are finally fine now. After a year of awful torments. Thanks guys. Appreciated every single comment up there. BetheButterfly, God will remember that you've lived & glorified Christ, helped a young Christian girl here, with His words. Praise the Lord. Thanks everyone, so much.
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