TheVSilent Posted June 6, 2011 Posted June 6, 2011 Like they will never meet anyone that "gets" you like your ex? I mean I was with her for 5 years and it feels like I will never be that comfortable again. I'm 26 and I really don't even know where to start to meet anyone new.
GivenUp0083 Posted June 6, 2011 Posted June 6, 2011 Like they will never meet anyone that "gets" you like your ex? I mean I was with her for 5 years and it feels like I will never be that comfortable again. I'm 26 and I really don't even know where to start to meet anyone new. I totally feel like that. I was single for 4 years before meeting my ex and I felt like I looked for so long just to find her and it's hard to think I'll find anyone ever again. How do I deal with this? I stopped caring. I went to a party last weekend, and usually I would be looking for single girls to introduce myself to and meet them. Instead, I just had fun, got a little enthusiastic about the flippy cup game, and I had two women approach ME and talk to me. I didn't hit on them, I made friendly conversation. Basically not giving a rats ass about dating or meeting someone is the way to go. It's such a stupid and torturing process, why even put yourself through it? What's the value of the outcome? Just do what you want to do and have fun. If someone finds you then great, but being the one to find someone is bull**** and I won't be doing that again.
california15 Posted June 6, 2011 Posted June 6, 2011 Yes I feel like that 100%. I'm not even attracted to anyone else and have no interest in being with anyone else and sometimes I feel like its never going to get better and I'll never be in love again. but then I look at the ex before this most recent one. At the time, I couldn't imagine finding anyone else other than him but we broke up and I found the most current ex and once I started dating him, I realized he was better than the first ex and that i'd never would have met him if I was still with the first guy. So, as much as I can't imagine being with someone else, that no one will be the same as him, that I'll never again have the closeness I had with him with another man, history shows me its not the case. the feeling is normal
superchiefs Posted June 6, 2011 Posted June 6, 2011 Like they will never meet anyone that "gets" you like your ex? I mean I was with her for 5 years and it feels like I will never be that comfortable again. I'm 26 and I really don't even know where to start to meet anyone new. I am in the same boat. Just got out of a 5+ year relationship 6 weeks ago, I am 31 and I dont really know where to go to meet new people either. I have been branching out by contacting people from my past, but a lot of them have left town so they arent really available to do anything with me anyways. My biggest problem is that while I feel strong a lot of the time, I keep having weak moments where I end up contacting my ex either by online chat, email or phone. There are just too many avenues of communication available and she keeps on accepting all of them and responding because she feels guilty about dumping me.
pippa02 Posted June 6, 2011 Posted June 6, 2011 I definatly feel the same, four months ago my firstlove broke up with me after four years! Now I just feel like I am never going to find anyone as good as him, and that the new relationships I have will never be as good as it was with my ex. its been four months and I still don't really have any interest in other guys! i guess it just will take time, and will happen when you at least expect it
Kilty Posted June 6, 2011 Posted June 6, 2011 As human beings we dont like change particularly when you have been used to something for a long time. You have heard the sayings like embracing change is a good thing - that may apply with work etc but not when it comes to relationships. Best evidence of that is that there are thousands of cases where you hear of people that have been in horrible abusive relationships being depressed over the break up instead of rejoicing that they are free. Silly isnt it ? Also humans would rather be lazy if we are given the choice. We were comfortable with our ex's and now we have to go through finding someone we get a spark from followed by the chasing & impressing (which can take ages with no guarantee of success) before we can get that comfortable again with someone new and the thought of it makes us cant be bothered lol. We would prefer the easy option and rather imagine we can get our ex's back and everything would go back to the way it was with all the problems that caused the break up gone - which is fantasy Surely there is some truth in that if we are honest
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