Unintelligent misogyny

[TheLawmaker]

I am having fun with the resident troll/misogynist, but the truth is that a man sounds incredibly unintelligent when he spews all that crap.

 

Yes, women go for bad boys. Not all women, but some. Yes, some women like abusers. Not all, but some. Yes, some women are drug addicts. Not all, but some.

 

It shows a very limited pattern of thinking when you apply a partial factor to all factors. It makes you look like a retard.

 

I may not have success with women, but it's not because I'm a "nice guy." It's because I haven't met the right person yet, or been put in that situation yet.

 

And sluts can have their bad boys. I will have a good girl, when she finds me and if she wants me.

[utterer of lies]

fu ck you.

 

It does have a way with words, don't you think?

[TheLawmaker]

It does have a way with words, don't you think?

 

Ah yes. So eloquent!

[Ouroboros]

The women I have known who date or are married have gone for guys with a chip on their shoulder. I haven't known her antithesis except in a romantic film or novel.

[Dust]

I agree with what was written in the OP.

[Mme. Chaucer]

The women I have known who date or are married have gone for guys with a chip on their shoulder. I haven't known her antithesis except in a romantic film or novel.

 

Does that encompass your mother, your grandma, each and every girl you went to school with (as your society compelled you to do), all your female teachers throughout whatever education you had, all the women you interact with on the Internets ... oh, but maybe you did not know all of these females enough to know what kind of relationships with men they've had.

 

To the OP - I appreciate your post. I think that the "resident troll" of whom you speak, though, spews equally on men and women. I'm pretty sure he's supremely loaded this evening.

[Ouroboros]

Does that encompass your mother, your grandma, each and every girl you went to school with (as your society compelled you to do), all your female teachers throughout whatever education you had, all the women you interact with on the Internets ... oh, but maybe you did not know all of these females enough to know what kind of relationships with men they've had.

My mother married a narcissistic rage-oholic. My father's mother divorced his father because he would get drunk and beat her. My parents were best friends with a couple who were instrumental in setting them up. The husband had a horrible temper and he has alienated everyone around him except his wife. His wife doesn't like him. My mother's mother's friend, one of the nicest women in the world, was married to a guy who liked putting his fist through a wall and getting drunk before he passed. My cousin likes the drink as well and in one of his stupors told his eldest daughter she was a mistake. He has become too drunkenly belligerent for them to live around anymore last I heard. Another couple my family was friends with the stepfather wouldn't allow his stepson to have an emotion and berate him if he showed any feeling in the least. He was very controlling when it came to anything his stepson did. I hope I don't have to list them all. It is a pretty lengthy list.

 

I was only referring to those I could actually know. People on the internet you can't know unless you set up a meeting. Have you ever done that? I haven't yet. Seems too risky.

[Stung]

The women I have known who date or are married have gone for guys with a chip on their shoulder. I haven't known her antithesis except in a romantic film or novel.

 

This is sad, but if it is your truth then all it suggests to me is that you need to broaden your horizons. Your corner of the world is dark and limited.

[gaius]

I haven't yet met a woman who is turned off by a strong man who expresses his strength in the right way. I have met plenty of women who realized that being with a not so strong man might serve their needs better and have ended up settling for one.

[Disillusioned]

I haven't yet met a woman who is turned off by a strong man who expresses his strength in the right way. I have met plenty of women who realized that being with a not so strong man might serve their needs better and have ended up settling for one.

 

I sort of agree there.

 

Being a homeowner with no debts can be a bad thing... to someone who doesn't know me personally, a woman would be a fifth wheel if all I need her for is an activity partner and a hug now and then.

 

Still, it would be nice to have someone who can appreciate me for being me.

[Lucky_One]

I find myself sometimes getting so angry when I read some threads here. The absolute hatred that people have for the other sex. It goes both ways, but IMHO it does tend to be more men hating women.

 

If I had my way, every child born would have a strong, loving, and healthy male and female to model good emotional behavior for them and raise them to be strong, loving and healthy adults. (In my more radical moments, I am also for enforced birth-control for all women until age 25.)

 

Instead we have young single mothers whose late childhoods are interrupted by the responsibilities of babies and who often are poor caregivers or who dump their child on older family members so they can go out and socialize. We have men who become strangled by the thought of having to help care for a mother and child, and who begin seeing all women as suspicious takers who only want to use a man for his money, his status, his connections. We have young women who are so desperate for the love and affection of a father that they turn to their young BFs and will have sex in order to gain love and affection, and who interpret sexual interest as caring. Often because of the nature of the teenaged brain, both boys and girls re impulsive and make decisions on very poor rationales and quirky brain impulses and hormones.

 

And then they are not forgiven for their wrong decisions or their poor impulse control. Women are branded sluts or whores, and then some men seem to think that they are now and forever fair game for being treated solely as a sexual dumpster, and women begin to resort to game-laying and manipulation. Men become hurt by women's behaviors, and so they look at women askance with distrust, and...and...and....

 

It is a huge downward spiral, and I am at a loss for how to stop it. I DO believe that the education of our young people begins at home, and I wish that the communications industries were ashamed of what they espouse as being trendy and in fashion. When I see the trash that passes for television entertainment, it shocks and saddens me. When I watch the parents who let their daughters walk around in ridiculously short skirts or whose sons speak to them disrespectfully, and whose kids constantly break rules and flout authority and skip school, I wonder what led them to have such poor boundaries and to be such poor enforcers of the responsibilities of parenthood.

 

I am so thankful for the accident of nature that led to me being born to the parents that I had, and for the kind and gentle upbringing that helped teach me to be a rational and responsible woman. I am so thankful for my XH, who tries his hardest with me to raise our son as we believe he should be raised, even though our marriage relationship did not work out. I am equally as thankful for my H, who loves my son deeply and wants him to grow into a responsible, strong man.

 

OP, you WILL meet that wonderful, "nice" girl; I wish you the greatest of happiness with her. And Disillusioned, there is a woman out there for you, too - I promise!

[milkmaterial]

ouro:

 

well no **** sherlock..look at what became of you

 

as for the other poster

 

keep believing you deserve the girl you really want (good girls) because they do exist and its just a matter of time.

[Feelsgoodman]

I may not have success with women, but it's not because I'm a "nice guy." It's because I haven't met the right person yet, or been put in that situation yet.

No that's just an excuse (and a rather lame one at that). If, at the age of 28, you're still waiting to experience success with women, it's not because you haven't met the right person yet. Rather, it's because you have no idea how to get women.

[Mme. Chaucer]

I haven't yet met a woman who is turned off by a strong man who expresses his strength in the right way.

 

That's been my experience.

 

Men (and women) who are "bad" are often acting out of profound weakness, which is not attractive to many.

 

I am not going to deny the allure of a certain type of "bad boy." If this wasn't reality, we would not idolize James Dean, Jim Morrison and Keith Richards. Some people are just magnetic for any number of reasons. Self confidence and the way a person carries themselves is a big part of it.

 

The archetypical "femme fatale" is the feminine version. Men know they're "bad" ... yet they are compelling and pretty much irresistible.

 

For those of us who do not fall into either of these romantic categories, it falls to each of us as individuals to be the best we can be while remaining true to ourselves, and to continue to hope, and to try to find others who will like us for the qualities we have.

 

Believe me, there are plenty of "bad boys" laying around the center of town, homeless and drunk, and in jail. Girls are not flocking to them.

[Mme. Chaucer]

My mother married a narcissistic rage-oholic. My father's mother divorced his father because he would get drunk and beat her. My parents were best friends with a couple who were instrumental in setting them up. The husband had a horrible temper and he has alienated everyone around him except his wife. His wife doesn't like him. My mother's mother's friend, one of the nicest women in the world, was married to a guy who liked putting his fist through a wall and getting drunk before he passed. My cousin likes the drink as well and in one of his stupors told his eldest daughter she was a mistake. He has become too drunkenly belligerent for them to live around anymore last I heard. Another couple my family was friends with the stepfather wouldn't allow his stepson to have an emotion and berate him if he showed any feeling in the least. He was very controlling when it came to anything his stepson did. I hope I don't have to list them all. It is a pretty lengthy list.

 

I was only referring to those I could actually know. People on the internet you can't know unless you set up a meeting. Have you ever done that? I haven't yet. Seems too risky.

 

Well, that is a pretty grim history and it is no wonder that you have such a jaundiced view, coming out of that. Still, it is your choice whether to carry on, or to go a different way. Which is available.

[Feelsgoodman]

Instead we have young single mothers whose late childhoods are interrupted by the responsibilities of babies and who often are poor caregivers or who dump their child on older family members so they can go out and socialize. We have men who become strangled by the thought of having to help care for a mother and child, and who begin seeing all women as suspicious takers who only want to use a man for his money, his status, his connections. We have young women who are so desperate for the love and affection of a father that they turn to their young BFs and will have sex in order to gain love and affection, and who interpret sexual interest as caring. Often because of the nature of the teenaged brain, both boys and girls re impulsive and make decisions on very poor rationales and quirky brain impulses and hormones.

This is what happens when, for decades, the concept of a traditional family (marrying at a young age, husband working, wife staying at home with the kids) is relentlessly attacked by feminists and their dupes in the government, media and academia as outdated, reactionary and stifling to women.

 

This is what happens when people are encouraged to be selfish and live for themselves rather than being family oriented.

 

This is what happens when you pass no fault divorce laws that promote infidelity and encourage the break up of families.

 

This is what happens when the family court system becomes so grossly unfair to men that getting married is seen as the equivalent of playing russian roulette.

 

This is happens when the largest social engineering experiment in human history fails.

[Mme. Chaucer]

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheLawmaker

I may not have success with women, but it's not because I'm a "nice guy." It's because I haven't met the right person yet, or been put in that situation yet.

 

 

No that's just an excuse (and a rather lame one at that). If, at the age of 28, you're still waiting to experience success with women, it's not because you haven't met the right person yet. Rather, it's because you have no idea how to get women.

 

How do you know, Feelsgoodman? Perhaps the OP's concept of "success with women" is completely different from your own.

 

OP, I am happy to hear a guy actually say that his challenges with women are not entirely attributable to being a "nice guy."

 

I promise you that there are plenty of women who will appreciate a nice guy - which is not to be confused with a doormat. A nice guy with strength. Like Atticus Finch in "To Kill A Mockingbird."

[Ouroboros]

This is sad, but if it is your truth then all it suggests to me is that you need to broaden your horizons. Your corner of the world is dark and limited.

 

Well, that is a pretty grim history and it is no wonder that you have such a jaundiced view, coming out of that. Still, it is your choice whether to carry on, or to go a different way. Which is available.

 

Listing it makes it sound worse than it is. It just is what it is. I have wondered if it was localized but then I come on the internet and find people who are as hurt. I have begun to accept wounded souls are universal, the norm, and apart of human nature.

 

Looking back on my childhood I don't recall many who came out untainted. The ones who seemed to I have wondered if they were the stabilizing force in a broken home like a load bearing wall.

[samspade]

I am having fun with the resident troll/misogynist, but the truth is that a man sounds incredibly unintelligent when he spews all that crap.

 

Yes, women go for bad boys. Not all women, but some. Yes, some women like abusers. Not all, but some. Yes, some women are drug addicts. Not all, but some.

 

It shows a very limited pattern of thinking when you apply a partial factor to all factors. It makes you look like a retard.

 

I may not have success with women, but it's not because I'm a "nice guy." It's because I haven't met the right person yet, or been put in that situation yet.

 

And sluts can have their bad boys. I will have a good girl, when she finds me and if she wants me.

 

First of all, you're calling people misogynists and retards. You mad dude?

 

Secondly, you are rationalizing your own behavior as a nice guy. Couldn't possibly be your fault that you don't have success with women, could it? Must be everyone else's - the sluts and the bad boys. Keep doing what you're doing and you'll keep getting what you're getting.

 

And of course there's the old trope of calling guys who get some "bad boys" and the women they get with "sluts." Bet if a "good girl" took you home and blew your mind, you wouldn't think she was a slut, would you? I hope when you find that so-called good girl, you don't question for a second how she got so good in bed.

 

Good luck waiting for the right girl.

[TheLawmaker]

To me, I see five causes and effects as to why I am single and have very little experience at 28:

 

1. The Christian/Virgin Phenomenon: Growing up, I was a Christian (and still am.) However, I heard the "wait until you're married" bit from my mom and from the church. I heard abstinence talks from my high school and teachers. I also figured that, if I met a girl who was mature and we clicked, then I would go after her. This ties into #2, but I'll cover that later.

 

Bottom line is, I figured everyone was waiting along with me. And when I found out that 75% of my high school left, not being virgins, I felt socially isolated.

 

2. The "Oneitis" bit: Yes, I put the pussy on a pedestal in high school. I always was going "she's the girl I'm gonna marry!", and then ask her out and obsess over her. This, in turn, would freak her out, and of course I would be rejected.

 

3. I hate rejection, and stopped asking out girls because of it: The reason I never "matured" with my classmates, and got a girlfriend my age, is because I feared rejection. I was a big nerd in HS, and got bullied and teased. As a result of this, I simply backed away from it, and stopped getting up the nerve to ask out women. This progressed into years of not asking out women.

 

4. Desperation and social anxiety: After I went to college for the first time at 22, I realized all my younger classmates were more sexually experienced than me. Some even had children. This made me freak out, and gave me social anxiety in general; I couldn't relate to people who were even a few years younger than me, so how am I supposed to relate to people my own age? Or women at all?

 

The final straw that sent me into a deep depression was realizing that my dorm roommate was going out and having sex with his college girlfriend, and also bringing back girls to our dorm. And I was so shy and socially anxious that I couldn't relate to the girls, or him, at all.

 

5. Where I am now: I have had several instances where a girl has given me a "green light" to ask her out, since high school. In fact, I probably have had a girl "come on to me" at least 7-8 times, maybe even more.

 

I've also been told I'm good looking, so that isn't the issue. The issue is that I'm 28, a virgin, and never kissed, and I feel embarrassed at my age for being that. So I don't ask out girls, and reject them when they make a move to me. All the while, I get depressed because I have nobody, and I want a girl to "break through" all the madness, deduce I'm a virgin with no experience, and seduce ME (yeah, like that's ever going to happen.)

 

So it's been a chain of 5 different events/key points, that have led to me being here. People like me. I generally am very social, and have lots of friends. They think I'm asexual, though, or gay and in the closet, simply because I don't feel comfortable discussing sex, and haven't had any girlfriends (for reasons I've already stated.)

[Feelsgoodman]

How do you know, Feelsgoodman? Perhaps the OP's concept of "success with women" is completely different from your own.

The is no "concept". It's all very simple and obvious. A man who spends 28 years on this planet is bound to meet women that he finds attractive (unless he is a hermit who lives in the desert). If he experiences no success with these women, he either has unrealistic expectations (playing way out of his league) or no social skills necessary to get women.

 

I have also read Lawmaker's other posts. It's clear that he is not celibate by choice and is very unhappy and frustrated with his lack of success with women.

 

I promise you that there are plenty of women who will appreciate a nice guy - which is not to be confused with a doormat. A nice guy with strength. Like Atticus Finch in "To Kill A Mockingbird."

I don't see how this is helpful. Atticus Finch is a fictional character from a novel. Lawmaker is a human being living in the real world. Obviously, the OP is doing something very wrong if he still can't get women at 28. I don't see how your feel good rhetoric is supposed to help him.

[Lucky_One]

I hope when you find that so-called good girl, you don't question for a second how she got so good in bed.

 

 

I'm good in bed. I certainly would not be considered a slut.

 

Good lord. Do you really believe that you can only be a good lover if you behave like a strumpet??

[Ouroboros]

You can't be skilled without practice.

[TheLawmaker]

My point was that a type of girl goes after a type of guy.

 

Sluts like bad boys.

 

How in the world does that refer to sexually experienced, healthy individuals? I'd say that a slut isn't a sexually healthy individual. Neither is a player.

[Ouroboros]

Does someone who will go after any potential partner have a type?