talkboxier Posted June 2, 2011 Posted June 2, 2011 Let me start of with some of the problems that have been bothering her for a couple of months. First off, I have been neglecting her alot lately and I will admit it. I go to the gym almost every night with my friends, and leave her to drive herself and our 2 year old boy home, which is about a 40 mile drive. I constantly do alot of computer work for other people, and always putting her on the back burner. We have a had couple arguments about 7 months ago. But we haven't really been fighting. My wife just told me about 2 weeks ago that she doesn't love me an is not emotionally connected to me anymore. She says she still cares for me, but she cant keep faking that she loves me. She told me a week prior from this event that she loved me. How can this be? Later I begged and pleaded for her to stay. Promising marriage counseling, changing, doing anything I possibly could to keep her. When i first said that, she said she was confused about the situation and asked why I had a complete 180 on our relationship. I told her because I love her and that i realized my mistakes. She said she had to think about it. I wanted to leave her alone but we lived together. It was so hard seeing her every day, know that I couldn'd touch her, hold her, tell her that I love her. I started getting panic attacks and continued begging her. Later she said she didn't want to try. I asked for a trial separation for a couple of months, Which she agreed to. After a couple of days I asked her if this is something she is willing to do. She said no, and that she just wants a divorce. She moved most of her stuff out already, and she is getting the rest soon. Now we have to juggling around with one car and our baby back and forth. It is very hard. What should I do in this situation?
robf1971 Posted June 2, 2011 Posted June 2, 2011 So do you know who the other man is? Yep sounds like if you start digging you will find something is rotten in Denmark.
Author talkboxier Posted June 2, 2011 Author Posted June 2, 2011 There is no other guy. I have secretly been throught her phone as well as her facebook. I found absolutely nothing.
missmyhusband Posted June 2, 2011 Posted June 2, 2011 It may not be another man at all. You said it yourself you have been neglecting her. I know how she feels and she probably just needs time to cool off . My husband told me for 3 weeks Its over and to move on and after 22 days he's here right now..there's hope..if u really love her don't give up...I basically became a stalker and wouldn't go away and now hes here..I dont know if hes moving back yet...
Iconoclast Posted June 2, 2011 Posted June 2, 2011 Talkboxier. Reboot's post is rather blunt. But, if Love Shack were a casino, i'd be a very rich man by betting that she's seeing someone else, even with the limited info you've given. It's just patterns, and odds. So what you need to do is investigate (you're tech savvy), and rule out another man. Because your actions will need to take entirely different courses depending on that outcome if you want to save your relationship (no guarantees). Additionally, if she's seeing someone else, and you want to continue your marriage, you need to take action ASAP.
Author talkboxier Posted June 2, 2011 Author Posted June 2, 2011 We have had a lot of ups and downs in our relationship. I used to the the sensitive, romantic lover. She has done somethings that made me close up and harden my heart. Which was the WRONG thing to do. I know my mistakes. I love more than life itself and strongly believe in making marriages work. I am willing to do anything to get her back.
robf1971 Posted June 2, 2011 Posted June 2, 2011 But, if Love Shack were a casino, i'd be a very rich man by betting that she's seeing someone else. What a great analogy..
Author talkboxier Posted June 2, 2011 Author Posted June 2, 2011 I don't want to be the stalker type, But I just went through her facebook, and still nothing. I haven't found anything at all about another guy.
Author talkboxier Posted June 2, 2011 Author Posted June 2, 2011 So another man is not in the picture. What should I do now?
jaymz Posted June 2, 2011 Posted June 2, 2011 You need to look harder, things can be deleted. Dont check the phone, check the phone bill. Dont check facebook, look at the history. Check her bags, pockets, purse etc for reciepts. Check bank statements, credit cards and look for cards you didnt know about. Have car tracked, put voice activated pen in car or her bag. If you get the ILUBNILWU speech, odds are, she is with someone else.
Author talkboxier Posted June 3, 2011 Author Posted June 3, 2011 hacked onto her cell phone carried account. called every unfamiliar number in there. not one guy. went through every email address. she has a couple. one of which she never sorts through, and its receives all updates from facebook. nothing. absolutely nothing. not one trace of a man at all
coolheadal Posted June 3, 2011 Posted June 3, 2011 What's up with these wives telling us that. I hate it when they say they don't love you anymore but like to be friends still. Friends! How is that going to work Friends. Marriage is gone and your partner has left the coop! How are these women starting this trend all we man get shell shock over this and don't know how to handle it. Most of us wasn't train for this let down. I had married for keeps not for the divorce greed.
Author talkboxier Posted June 3, 2011 Author Posted June 3, 2011 Thats exactly what she said. She wanted to be friends. I think she only wants that to use me and make everything easier on herself.
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