axman463 Posted June 1, 2011 Posted June 1, 2011 (edited) Ok- So I was dating a gal, she and I had a ton of fun. We are very nice to one another, respect one another, enjoy everything together. She called me one day and stated that her and I are looking for different things. Well she had started bringing up marriage 3-4 months into the relationship. Naturally, I pulled away because I was still getting to know her and wanted to care for her more deeply. This put a nudge between the relationship (more stress), and over time coupled with a few other things, I started working more. I did this because she wanted a big wedding (which we would pay for) and a few other things that cost money. I know that there are reasons I get scared to get close (so I have taken the last 2 months to work on myself, seek professional help, and been reading lots of books). When is the right time to approach her? What is the best way to approach her? **We talked 4 days after she did it, I opened up and she stated that she was waiting for that for awhile. I tried a again a couple of weeks later. She denied the attempt. It has now been 3 more weeks and I still feel the same about her. I have been waiting 28 years for a woman like her and I am kicking myself in the butt for not paying better attention to her concerns! Any advise would be very helpfuL! Edited June 1, 2011 by axman463
Cee Posted June 1, 2011 Posted June 1, 2011 If she was putting marriage pressure on you 3 months into dating, she has issues. And she has no concept that love takes time and patience. I would walk away. She has growing up to do or she'll be another divorce statistic. In my opinion, the first months of dating are a period of getting to know someone, not locking someone in forever. What's her hurry anyway? When two people love each other that is the prize, not a wedding ring. I can't believe that she loved you that much to ditch you so quickly.
Andy_K Posted June 1, 2011 Posted June 1, 2011 Any advise would be very helpfuL! Stop and reflect on what's happened until you realise that you have indeed dodged a bullet here.
Author axman463 Posted June 3, 2011 Author Posted June 3, 2011 Cee- I agree to an extent. I put up a wall that I really couldnt bring back down once she started talking about that. It really put an something that wasnt needed in between her and I. On the flip side, without that and a couple other things, we would be doing very well. So you think stay away even though we are a pretty solid match?
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