bml929 Posted May 29, 2011 Posted May 29, 2011 Sorry for my english. Hi guys. I had dated this girl 7 times in this past 6 weeks that i met online. We sleep together but we didn't had sex yet. When we go out, we hold hand and kiss. Everything was great until she ask me this question last night. We were on her bed and makeout (snuggling and lot of kissing). Suddenly, she said that she need to ask me one important question after she take a shower. When she come back, She jump on the bed and start to kiss me. After a moment, she snuggle on me and she is ready to ask me the question. She ask me what I thought about the current situation between me and her. I reply that it can have a great potentiel and we will see with time. She look at me saying that I didn't really answer to her question. So I joke that we should wrote a success story on the online date website. She laugh and I ask her...why that question and if she felt the same thing. She reply that her answer will be negative. So she tell me that about 2 years now, her #1 priority is her study (for her career), wanted to travel a lot and know more about herself. Because she's doesn't want to make compromise by being in couple. She want to accomplish what she want to do and to settle after that. Also, that she live her life the instant moment. She wanted to tell me this to make me clear about the situation. I reply that i understand and that i also live my life the instant present. And everything is ok. And we continue to kiss! (I felt that she was really relax after this conversation) She ask me if i wanted to sleep the night with her. By giving her a big kiss, I said yes i wanted to. (She had to work the next day so she have to wakeup early)(I didn't had sex ) She beg to sleep without my shift/tank top. I took off and she was like all over me with kiss. She touch my ass (she never grap my ass before) and I touch her breast. After a lot of minutes of kissing, we fall to sleep. This morning at 7am, she had to wakeup but wanted to snooze some time. During that time, we kiss and she kiss all over my body. She even gave me like a back massage. So at 8 am, i drove her to a subway train so she can go to work. When I was back at home, i started to re-think of what we talk last night. And I found really weird. So i start to analyze the situation. I give her space. We see once every weekend and one time, a thursday evening. We text each other once of twice per week to plan a date during the weekend. I'm not needy and my goal was to have fun when i'm with her. I really want to be with her and like her a lot. What I was planning to do is to invite her to my place and give her the greatest sex she never had. So maybe she might change her mind. So what you guys think about that? What should I do?
spiderowl Posted May 29, 2011 Posted May 29, 2011 My impression is that she likes you, she thinks she can have fun with you and would like a sexual relationship, but deep down she does not believe you are 'the one' and so comes up with lots of reasons why she needs to stay uncommitted. I have been there and said similar things. She does not want you to be hurt if you both play at sex and she wants to make sure you understand it might not last. She doesn't want you to get too emotionally involved, just enough to care about her as a friend and to enjoy sex together. In my case, there were good reasons why I did not see him as a long-term prospect. In my situation, it ended badly as he did get involved. Next time (if there is a next time), I will be blunt and tell him I won't get emotionally attached but I'm happy to have some fun if he is. In actual fact, I'm not likely to do this now because people only hear what they want to hear. By the way, your English is very good and a lot better than most English guys', so no need to apologise for it!
Author bml929 Posted May 29, 2011 Author Posted May 29, 2011 thanks for your opinion. I agree of what you are saying. It's just weird that this morning when we woke up, she told me that she just has a dream about us kissing. I will judge her by her actions not only by her word. Because, she paid most of our recents dates. Why would someone pay the dates and said that I don't want to commit. Anyway, I just have to enjoy every date I will have with her, keep my mouth shut about this subject with her and see what will happen afterward.
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