red shoes Posted May 29, 2011 Posted May 29, 2011 An ex broke up with me via the email. Does he expect a reply? Or he (a coward since the breakup involved the email) would prefer NC from me so he could say heave a sigh of relief and say "good riddance?"
heartshaped Posted May 29, 2011 Posted May 29, 2011 I don't think it really matters about what your ex expects, but more so, about what you want. If you don't want to reply, don't. If you feel you need to reply for closure than do so.
Author red shoes Posted May 29, 2011 Author Posted May 29, 2011 Actually I'm over it. I'm just curious to know what he might think. I guess you can say I hope he feels the hurt from my NC.
Tayla Posted May 29, 2011 Posted May 29, 2011 I am 100% certain that your going NC will not create a tear to his eye. HE made his decision and chose to do it via email/text. That was his closure. Its up to you to handle it in a way that best fits the relations.
Author red shoes Posted May 29, 2011 Author Posted May 29, 2011 I am 100% certain that your going NC will not create a tear to his eye. HE made his decision and chose to do it via email/text. That was his closure. Its up to you to handle it in a way that best fits the relations. IDK. If I was the one doing the dumping over the email, I would still expect the ex to reply to find out more or have his say. If the ex doesn't do that, I would be curious, no?
HeavenOrHell Posted May 29, 2011 Posted May 29, 2011 What would you like to say to him, if anything? If you've nothing you want to say then I wouldn't bother saying anything just for effect. Sounds like you're not bothered anyway, so maybe just leave it, go NC and move on IDK. If I was the one doing the dumping over the email, I would still expect the ex to reply to find out more or have his say. If the ex doesn't do that, I would be curious, no?
Author red shoes Posted May 29, 2011 Author Posted May 29, 2011 I may not have been clear in my thread but I'm just CURIOUS as to what this ex might think about me not having responded to his break-up email. I'm not after advice on how I can feel better after the breakup. Maybe someone who has dumped some other person this way could shed light as to how they feel toward 1. no reply to the email 2. no begging for them to come back?
HeavenOrHell Posted May 29, 2011 Posted May 29, 2011 Why do you care about his response or lack of it though? If you want him back then it's ok to say that here and we can talk it through If you don't want him back then I'm not sure why his response/lack of it matters? What do you want his response at your lack of response to be and why? On the flipside; the person who's dumped would only be bothered about no response to an email where they finished with someone if they wanted the person they dumped back, otherwise they'll probably be relieved at the lack of response, or maybe a bit concerned that the person they dumped is ok, if they're a caring type. I may not have been clear in my thread but I'm just CURIOUS as to what this ex might think about me not having responded to his break-up email. I'm not after advice on how I can feel better after the breakup. Maybe someone who has dumped some other person this way could shed light as to how they feel toward 1. no reply to the email 2. no begging for them to come back?
Author red shoes Posted May 30, 2011 Author Posted May 30, 2011 Why do you care about his response or lack of it though? If you want him back then it's ok to say that here and we can talk it through If you don't want him back then I'm not sure why his response/lack of it matters? What do you want his response at your lack of response to be and why? On the flipside; the person who's dumped would only be bothered about no response to an email where they finished with someone if they wanted the person they dumped back, otherwise they'll probably be relieved at the lack of response, or maybe a bit concerned that the person they dumped is ok, if they're a caring type. I don't want him back but it would be interesting to know. Anyway, anyone else has an opinion?
bolase Posted May 30, 2011 Posted May 30, 2011 Yes! I have an opinion. I just dumped someone via email - the lesser of two options, the other being skype, but as our schedules allow skype once a month if that, I decided not to hold back my feelings. Judge it as you like. I was very curious to know his response - but that is because I broke up with him due to doubts in specific areas, so I explained this and kind of expected a response to my epiphany/decision about us (though I wouldn't have been mad if he'd just given me silence). He did reply and we have been in interesting debate over this issue (religion) ever since. I am still not sure if we are compatible, but I can't be with him long distance with these doubts. We both want to keep in touch at the moment. I think if your boyfriend gave you some kind of explanation then he would expect a response and be curious, but if you don't reply he'll get over it, I think.
Author red shoes Posted May 31, 2011 Author Posted May 31, 2011 Yes! I have an opinion. I just dumped someone via email - the lesser of two options, the other being skype, but as our schedules allow skype once a month if that, I decided not to hold back my feelings. Judge it as you like. I was very curious to know his response - but that is because I broke up with him due to doubts in specific areas, so I explained this and kind of expected a response to my epiphany/decision about us (though I wouldn't have been mad if he'd just given me silence). He did reply and we have been in interesting debate over this issue (religion) ever since. I am still not sure if we are compatible, but I can't be with him long distance with these doubts. We both want to keep in touch at the moment. I think if your boyfriend gave you some kind of explanation then he would expect a response and be curious, but if you don't reply he'll get over it, I think. How was his reply? My ex gave an explanation but to me any explanation is just an excuse (even if it's valid), especially done via the email. I'm sure he got over it since he didn't contact me either.
VicJay79 Posted May 31, 2011 Posted May 31, 2011 RedShoes, I think it would help if we could 'read' the e-mail he sent. Lets be honest its the best way to decide what course of action to take. An ex broke up with me via the email. Does he expect a reply? Or he (a coward since the breakup involved the email) would prefer NC from me so he could say heave a sigh of relief and say "good riddance?"
Tayla Posted May 31, 2011 Posted May 31, 2011 Since your feelings are not to be considered lets consider that A: He broke up. B: He did it his way. C: He is not expecting or seeking your view point. There is that clear to understand? Ohh and thats my objective stance on this matter as a person who got dumped this way. I had to learn that no matter what I would say back doesn't change the "action" that preceded it, which was his desire to break up. So why care what he thinks after that or convey how I felt, the damn was broken and the damage is done. Clean it up and move on.
HeavenOrHell Posted June 1, 2011 Posted June 1, 2011 Ok, let me put it another way, if someone dumps someone by email and the dumpee doesn't respond, then the dumper (if they care at all-some don't) will either be relieved that the dumpee isn't begging and whining and making a fuss, OR their ego will be bruised and they might think the dumpee couldn't care less. Or they might think the dumpee is too upset or angry to respond. Most will probably just feel relieved though. No begging for them to come back=same answer. Why not just admit you give a s*** what he thinks about you otherwise you wouldn't be asking us about it. I may not have been clear in my thread but I'm just CURIOUS as to what this ex might think about me not having responded to his break-up email. I'm not after advice on how I can feel better after the breakup. Maybe someone who has dumped some other person this way could shed light as to how they feel toward 1. no reply to the email 2. no begging for them to come back?
Author red shoes Posted June 1, 2011 Author Posted June 1, 2011 Thanks for all your replies. I was chatting with a few friends the other day about our exes and this came up. Believe what you will about my mindset. It's just a thread. Chill.
HeavenOrHell Posted June 1, 2011 Posted June 1, 2011 We've all wanted to know what was going on in our ex's minds at times, it's natural. Glad you're moving on ok though Thanks for all your replies. I was chatting with a few friends the other day about our exes and this came up. Believe what you will about my mindset. It's just a thread. Chill.
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