Untouchable_Fire Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 Not complaining really... but I'm kind of hitting a wall physically. I've been in relationships where there was lots of sex... but over short periods of time. This is just unrelenting... some days I feel completely worn out. It's averaging 3 times a day this month... up from last month which was like 2 times a day. I feel really weird asking this question because it feels like a great problem to have. When we were first dating she told me flat out that she didn't really enjoy sex. Then once we started having sex... her appetite for it has been slowly going up to the point where now I can barely keep up.... Literally. What's going on?
Feelsgoodman Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 If your d!ck is constantly sore, than you're probably doing it too much... On a serious note, too much sex in not a good thing as it drains your energy and leaves you feeling exhausted. Everything's good in moderation.
carhill Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 Yeah, rub it in My datapoint is, when I'm feeling more intimate, I feel more sexual, regardless of the 'number'. If/when there is time and mutual desire, sex follows. Perhaps the dichotomy between what she said and what she did is, in this case, 'female-speak' for 'you're abnormal and I want to ride you all the time'
Author Untouchable_Fire Posted May 26, 2011 Author Posted May 26, 2011 Yeah, rub it in My datapoint is, when I'm feeling more intimate, I feel more sexual, regardless of the 'number'. If/when there is time and mutual desire, sex follows. Perhaps the dichotomy between what she said and what she did is, in this case, 'female-speak' for 'you're abnormal and I want to ride you all the time' I think her previous relationships guys tended to pull away after sex, or made her feel that the relationship was all about sex. She has only been with about 4 guys before me... She seemed very inexperienced when it came to "her" pleasure. She was very against receiving oral sex... but has since totally changed her tune. Anyway... What do I do? Just buy some Viagra and go with the flow? Yesterday we had sex 6 times. Twice in the morning... 3 more times as soon as I got home and after dinner... and then she woke me up at 11pm for more. Grand total time had to be over 2 hours. There are some days now where it just refuses to work. I'm in pretty good shape and I spend at least 3 days a week in the gym. Any Ideas... I feel like I need help.
Cee Posted May 26, 2011 Posted May 26, 2011 Female point of view here. If she's having orgasms (virtually) every time you have sex, then all is well on her end. If she's not getting off, she may be using sex as a way to keep your attention. Or maybe she likes sex as a way of being close. If you are tired, how about give her a back or foot massage. Or have a tender talk while cuddling. Personally, I couldn't orgasm 150 times in a month. I would like to, but I don't have the stamina.
nyc_guy2003 Posted May 26, 2011 Posted May 26, 2011 How do you define one session of sex? When you shoot your load? Maybe you're shooting too soon and need multiple sessions to satisfy her once. If that's the case try lasting longer, that way you can do it less and still achieve the same goal of getting her off.
carhill Posted May 26, 2011 Posted May 26, 2011 Hey, post a thread when you got some problems The only thing I'd worry about is some sort of nymphomaniac hysterical bonding psychology. If she otherwise appears balanced, I wouldn't worry about it and just go with the flow, using cunnilingus and/or a vibrator on her when you get 'drained'. If frequency falls off over time, don't worry about that either. As long as you have good intimacy and shared love, it's all good.
SmileFace Posted May 26, 2011 Posted May 26, 2011 Hey, post a thread when you got some problems Yeah!
Sabali Posted May 26, 2011 Posted May 26, 2011 Unfortunately, you're still under-sexed. If no one is calling the fire department to pry you two apart, the sex glass is simply half full. Sorry.
chuckles11 Posted May 26, 2011 Posted May 26, 2011 Why not just talk to her about the problem and start telling her when you aren't in the mood? Tell her how many times a day you feel you can reasonably have sex. It may hurt her ego, but you will eventually stop enjoying yourself if sex always feels like an obligation.
Sabali Posted May 26, 2011 Posted May 26, 2011 Why not just talk to her about the problem and start telling her when you aren't in the mood? Tell her how many times a day you feel you can reasonably have sex. It may hurt her ego, but you will eventually stop enjoying yourself if sex always feels like an obligation. Yeah, the next time she asks to go another round just scream "I am not Sabali woman!"
Author Untouchable_Fire Posted May 26, 2011 Author Posted May 26, 2011 Female point of view here. If she's having orgasms (virtually) every time you have sex, then all is well on her end. If she's not getting off, she may be using sex as a way to keep your attention. Or maybe she likes sex as a way of being close. If you are tired, how about give her a back or foot massage. Or have a tender talk while cuddling. Personally, I couldn't orgasm 150 times in a month. I would like to, but I don't have the stamina. I am very certain she hits orgasm nearly every time we have sex. Foot and back massages along with tender talks and cuddling are very common in this relationship... the problem is that each tends to lead to sex. Why not just talk to her about the problem and start telling her when you aren't in the mood? Tell her how many times a day you feel you can reasonably have sex. It may hurt her ego, but you will eventually stop enjoying yourself if sex always feels like an obligation. I'm seriously ALWAYS in the mood. However... my body is starting to not agree. I am already turning her away at times... I phrase it as a self depreciating joke about my age. I never thought I would have this problem at 31.
oaks Posted May 26, 2011 Posted May 26, 2011 You've stepped up your, erm, exercise. Make sure you step up your diet so that you've got the energy to keep going. Nice problem to have!
NoReallyThatHappened Posted May 26, 2011 Posted May 26, 2011 That's a lot of sex!! Have you asked her why she is so into it and wants it all the time? I think wanting sex all the time is fine as long as there are no other deep seating underlying psychological issues. For example, does she think this is necessary to keep you around? I think it's important to communicate to her that your um, "friend" absolutely wants her all the time, but he might not be capable of sustaining this pace. Figure out what is reasonable for you to handle and ask if you two can ease down to having the amount of sex you can handle. I bet most guys here would love to have this problem!
sanskrit Posted May 26, 2011 Posted May 26, 2011 I have better things to do in life than have sex all day, so more than 7 times a week, I start to get bored and annoyed of it, and prefer 3-4 times a week.
tigressA Posted May 26, 2011 Posted May 26, 2011 In my current R, we had this problem--still do to an extent. I was raring to go multiple times a day (I think our current record is 6 times) and he was having trouble keeping up. He has had to sometimes turn me away. He explained to me that while I absolutely am desirable and he would love to be at my pace all the time, it just isn't physically possible for him. I understood and don't take it personally anymore if he turns me away. Just explain to her in a way that flatters her and still makes her feel desirable, and keep a pace that's more reasonable for you.
Cee Posted May 26, 2011 Posted May 26, 2011 Wait, maybe I have a solution. Take her out more and get exercise like running, biking, or swimming. Maybe you can wear her out so she drops off to sleep. Or perhaps encourage her to see her girlfriends and say, "Honey, have fun. Stay out as late as you want. I'll be pretending to be asleep when you get back." I'm sorry, I wish I had a better solution for this issue. I wish I experienced this issue.
Author Untouchable_Fire Posted May 26, 2011 Author Posted May 26, 2011 You've stepped up your, erm, exercise. Make sure you step up your diet so that you've got the energy to keep going. Nice problem to have! Good Idea!!! I noticed one day I had fast food and it really made me suck. I'm usually very energetic as a lover. That's a lot of sex!! Have you asked her why she is so into it and wants it all the time? I think wanting sex all the time is fine as long as there are no other deep seating underlying psychological issues. For example, does she think this is necessary to keep you around? I think it's important to communicate to her that your um, "friend" absolutely wants her all the time, but he might not be capable of sustaining this pace. Figure out what is reasonable for you to handle and ask if you two can ease down to having the amount of sex you can handle. I bet most guys here would love to have this problem! I try not to overanalyze stuff unless there is a big problem. If I were to make a guess... I think it makes her feel more intimate with me. Additionally... I'm not sure she had ever experienced an orgasm from intercourse before. That's just a guess though. When she has one it's super easy to tell because it's like someone turned on a faucet. Evidently that is something new to her. I don't think I'm doing anything special in bed... I think this comes from me adding in intimacy and romance. I think. In my current R, we had this problem--still do to an extent. I was raring to go multiple times a day (I think our current record is 6 times) and he was having trouble keeping up. He has had to sometimes turn me away. He explained to me that while I absolutely am desirable and he would love to be at my pace all the time, it just isn't physically possible for him. I understood and don't take it personally anymore if he turns me away. Just explain to her in a way that flatters her and still makes her feel desirable, and keep a pace that's more reasonable for you. Yes, that is pretty much what I'm doing too. Wait, maybe I have a solution. Take her out more and get exercise like running, biking, or swimming. Maybe you can wear her out so she drops off to sleep. Or perhaps encourage her to see her girlfriends and say, "Honey, have fun. Stay out as late as you want. I'll be pretending to be asleep when you get back." I'm sorry, I wish I had a better solution for this issue. I wish I experienced this issue. That does kind of work... We go hiking, mountain biking, swimming... ect on the weekends. She drops right to sleep when we get home... but she wakes up after an hour or so rearing to go. I made an appointment with my physician. I'm going to get some Viagra and see if that helps. I told her about that last night and she kissed me. BTW... I've had to almost completely stop drinking to prevent whiskey dick. This stuff is so embarrassing.
OliveOyl Posted May 26, 2011 Posted May 26, 2011 While a high frequency sounds great, such a high a frequency that meds (Viagra) are required sounds TOO high (given that you're a normally-responding male under middle-age).
sanskrit Posted May 26, 2011 Posted May 26, 2011 I made an appointment with my physician. I'm going to get some Viagra and see if that helps. Bad idea at your age IMO, you don't need it and there are definite side effects. She should moderate her appetite. Sex is not a "need," and it isn't a "drive" in the amounts being discussed here, it's an "appetite," and just like the appetite for anything else, pizza, ice cream, booze, watching sports, exercise, gambling, smoking, should be moderated by the person forming the appetite when it starts to have effects on their loved ones, not accommodated by the loved ones.
quietGuy13 Posted May 26, 2011 Posted May 26, 2011 I love sex and cannot have it cause i'm damaged. So all you guys are lucky
sweetjasmine Posted May 26, 2011 Posted May 26, 2011 Bad idea at your age IMO, you don't need it and there are definite side effects. She should moderate her appetite. Sex is not a "need," and it isn't a "drive" in the amounts being discussed here, it's an "appetite," and just like the appetite for anything else, pizza, ice cream, booze, watching sports, exercise, gambling, smoking, should be moderated by the person forming the appetite when it starts to have effects on their loved ones, not accommodated by the loved ones. Agreed. Going straight to medication is probably not a good idea. That's not what it was intended for, and there's nothing physically wrong with you for not being able to keep up with her. The human body is only capable of so much. You seriously have absolutely no reason to be embarrassed. Taking Viagra so you can have sex more than 5 times a day every single day is sort of like taking methamphetamine so you can stay up for 48 hours, sleep for 8, and then repeat all month long. The problem isn't your body being too slow; it's you wanting to force it to be faster than it can possibly handle.
musemaj11 Posted May 28, 2011 Posted May 28, 2011 I dont understand the concept of keeping a woman's feeling when turning her down for sex. Its just stupid. Expecting every man to be a horndog who is raring for sex 24 hours non stop is sexist itself in the first place.
sanskrit Posted May 28, 2011 Posted May 28, 2011 Expecting every man to be a horndog who is raring for sex 24 hours non stop is sexist itself in the first place. It's simply negative agitprop against men, portraying men as animals, pigs, dogs, who "think with their little head and not their big head." Dehumanizing men into beasts through cultural messages and reducing the male gender to its lowest common denominators, crooks, rapists, abusers, perverts, etc., is one of the greatest successes of the feminist left. Men joked about it too at first, but are starting to wake up to the damage these kinds of stereotypes do in real dollars and cents whenever a man has to go against a woman in court, or compete for a job. It's not funny any more.
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