Nohbody Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 After reading around the LS forum, I think I've come to understand a bit more what happened to my ex when she went away (or maybe what prompted her to leave in the first place). I blamed my own problems, and while I guess that didn't help, I don't feel responsible for what happened anymore. I think she'll try to reconcile at some point. It might be wishful thinking on my part, I don't know. I've made the conscious decision to let her go... and so that's what I'm trying to do. Does anyone have any recommended reading, from LS or otherwise?
Fedor Posted May 25, 2011 Posted May 25, 2011 Wise decision on your part. Its hard not to dwell on the situation. I've let go with my current ex and now she wants me back. Sometimes though, people need to live with there decisions. She broke up with me so I'm going to make her live with it.. At least for now anyway.
Author Nohbody Posted May 26, 2011 Author Posted May 26, 2011 Thanks Fedor. Best of luck, come what may. I still wake up in the middle of the night thinking about her, missing her, etc. She's on my mind far more often than not... but making the decision has helped some. When my mind starts to wander, and the pain wells up from the deep places I have to stop it and say "I'm letting her go" and it's helped incredibly... for the last two days, anyway
Author Nohbody Posted August 8, 2011 Author Posted August 8, 2011 It's funny reading this, again. I boxed up all of her stuff out of my car and out of my room, and it's going in the mail to her parents' house on monday. No note. No desperate pleading message. There's a dreadful finality in this act. But that ghost of 'us' is getting dimmer and dimmer, and I can feel her dying inside of me... those impressions of her I held on to. I didn't want this to happen... but I'm finishing it... slowly. And every day my memories grow more distant, and the emotional gulf separates me from her. And there's nothing between us anymore but empty space. An abyss I've been staring into for a long time, now. Beginning to consider walking away.
fetish1980 Posted August 8, 2011 Posted August 8, 2011 i'm still trying to let my ex go and it's one week away from being 6 months since our split. I'm kind of scared as time passes because i still get moments when i'[m very lonely. My ex totally shut down and even moved out of our apartment, then she still wants us to be in a relationship after she put my heart in a vice grip. Fk that! She needs to learn that life doesn't revolve around her. And when it comes to my own self respect, she was crossing the line. I don't trust her to go back with her. fetish
lalalandman Posted August 8, 2011 Posted August 8, 2011 Don't worry about it bud! I'm on 5 weeks of NC and I will tell you: Time will heal. In the meantime, just do everything you can to make sure you heal properly. For me, I changed my phone number, my email, deleted my FB. I didn't just box up all her stuff. I tossed it all out. Anything worth money I put on the sidewalk with a "FREE" sign taped to it. I kept just one item. That's really all I was left with. Now, I'm not fully healed. It sucks because for the last week I've had a dream about her every night. And trust me, it's not like I want to have friggin dreams about her. But this entire summer has been a real fun summer. I've gone out with many many girls. I've had good times with friends. Got a nice tan and a new wardrobe. By the time this summer is over, I'll be heading to Chicago in September to visit my best friend for my birthday. It's gonna take some time, but just make sure you really truly let it go. You have to make the decision to close the door for good. And thinking she will come back is a big no-no. Even if she does, the last thing you want to do is convince yourself she will.
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